This past week, Kim Kardashian shared with her Instagram followers a donkalicious photo of herself. While fans and boyfriend Yeezus approved, some looked at her photo with disdain. Our MadameNoire readers claimed her “look-back-at-it” selfie was “tacky and narcissistic.” Others noted her reputation with men and how she will never be wife material for Kanye West because of her attention-seeking antics. Most importantly, many who commented stated that her photo was not “mommy-like.”
As I read and listened to the commentary on Kim, I thought of my friends. Although we try not to take those selfies with our defined arms, legs and curves too seriously, we joke about the reason why some of us work out now: We desire to snap-back quickly after our future children have been delivered. Let’s be real, American society is fascinated with weight loss and sex appeal, especially when celebrity mothers are involved. Ashleigh Schmitz of Parade magazine writes:
“It’s no secret that celebrities bounce back from pregnancy faster than the average woman. After all, their schedules and job demands practically insist that they automatically zip up their size 0 jeans within a few weeks of their newborn’s first Instagram selfie. Who can forget Heidi Klum strutting down the Victoria’s Secret runway a mere 5 weeks after giving birth to her fourth child in 2009?”
As people continuously speak on what a mother should be or look like, it makes me wonder, where did we get these rules from?
Through social media and television we have come to know Kim as a media-opportunist. During the latest season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, she claimed that as soon as she delivered Baby North she would love to pose for Playboy magazine again. The Huffington Post reports:
“Kardashian’s insecurity about losing her sex appeal and cool factor during her pregnancy is something that has been explored this season on the show. In earlier episodes, Kardashian was seemingly obsessed with her teenage sister Kylie Jenner’s opinion on everything, and was on a quest to appear on her Tumblr as a sign that she was still cool.”
Although people may feel Kim K. has a marketed personality, her insecurity runs rampant in everyone. As my friends and I approach the height of our mid-20s, we have conversations about what it means to get older. Maturity means losing parts of yourself that you have grown accustomed to. During her pregnancy, Kim did not receive the friendliest feedback regarding her body size or fashion. Unlike the average woman who has given birth, Kim’s transition into motherhood was not only personal but also extremely public. As one of Hollywood’s “sex symbols,” she’s trying to figure out how to walk the line between being who folks know her to be, and developing into North West’s mother.
As people question her maternal instincts and what she should and shouldn’t be doing as a new mom, be reminded of Toni Braxton, who has two sons, contemplating if she too, should pose for Playboy during the second season of Braxton Family Values. And during interviews, mother and actress Paula Patton consistently discusses her sex life with husband Robin Thicke, even sharing how big his package is. Surprisingly enough, these women along with others have not been talked about as ladies missing the maternal gene. Or perhaps, there is no special gene that sets “real mothers” apart? When observing my own mother or aunts, I realize that being a “good” mom depends on how a woman chooses to develop herself, if she’s there for her child, nurturing the child (or children) and making sacrifices. Does one photo really have an impact on that? If you ask me, there’s not one way to be or act when you’re a mother, just as there isn’t one right or wrong way to be a woman.
Do you think Kim Kardashian is a good mom?