Ask A Very Smart Brotha: My Man Wants To Meet My Exes…

October 16, 2013  |  

Kathleen: When asked to complete a task by a female (other than boss), why does the male ALWAYS do it when he is ready and not when asked…what is the rational?

DY: Obviously, this doesn’t apply to every man and woman, but generally speaking, men and women seem to have different standards of urgency. Basically, when you say “This needs to happen now!!!” we think “Eh. I’ll do it, but relax. It’s not that serious.”

(And yes, this has happened in every relationship I’ve been in—including the current one)

 

Wicole: If someone is protective of their cell phone, does it mean they have something to hide?

DY: No. They may just feel a certain way about people snooping around their stuff. Doesn’t automatically mean they have something to hide, though

 

Jessica: Why does a woman’s independence scare men out of a relationship?

DY: Saying a man is “scared” or “intimidated” of a woman’s independence is a just an easy way of saying “He wasn’t attracted enough to her.”

 

Kenosha: Do you think a man would give a second chance to someone who pushed them away due to insecurity and baggage?

DY: Depends on the man, obviously. But, I will say that men generally don’t give women “second chances” the way women do for men. It happens, sure. But, not often.

 

Lisa: Why do men always act is if they want a certain type.Turn around and choose the total OPPOSITE!

DY: Same reason some woman may say they want a certain type of man but only date the opposites. Basically, most people have no idea what they actually want until they get it.

 

Slim: Is crossing the “friendship line” ever ok?

DY: LOL, depends on what you mean by “Ok.” Seriously though, if you have a mutual attraction, go for it. Eff a “friend line”

 

Sugga: Why would your current man want to meet your ex’s?

DY: To measure wangs? Seriously, I have no idea.

 

Kelle: What are your views on friendship before a relationship? From your experience and counsel, would you say that relationships where both parties are friends first for a good period of time tend to last?

DY: What are your views on friendship before a relationship? From your experience and counsel, would you say that relationships where both parties are friends first for a good period of time tend to last?

 

Jamie: Why is it that when you meet guys initially they let their guards down to get you… After they start getting to know you and feelings start to progress they become guarded and sometime stubborn? Isn’t that backwards?

I believe as we become older we become more spiritually inclined and “some” connections we feel with another person don’t happen everyday.. Just like a parent can love their child before they are born…. and when they see them in the flesh it just connects the feelings that were already there…… Is it safe to say you can love somebody before you even know them but staying in love requires work?

DY: Although women are the ones who usually get called out for having trust issues, men have them too. And, when men act like that, it’s usually a way to guard themselves from getting hurt. And no, I don’t think you can love someone before knowing them. You can be in love with the idea of being in love with them, but that’s a completely different thing

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