True Life: I Wouldn’t Loan Him Money Until…

September 27, 2013  |  


Money is sensitive subject. And we all know how love makes us act. So what happens when you blend the two. We asked our readers at what point in a relationship would they consider loaning your partner money. We got some really interesting responses. See what they had to say.

Silky: I’m too compassionate so I can’t really say…smh

Bianca: After the wedding

Samantha: …When all the money is shared.

Erica: After marriage and that would be because we will keep our finances separate. And yes, a promissory note must be signed and notarized.

Ameenya: I’m married and we don’t loan each other money because the money is both ours it doesn’t matter who’s pocket it’s coming out of.

Yolanda: Never. I have a real complex about loaning people money, especially if they don’t use it for what they asked for it for; doesn’t matter if they’re blood or if we’re in a relationship…it would have to be an EXTREME situation.

Sabrina: Maybe after he loaned me some of his money! Lol

Kimmy: Heed the warning, never loan a dude money. Swipe his metro card for the train tho.

She’Ron: Y’all putting all these standards on whether y’all would, should, or could loan the money…but if these are the standards y’all use to determine this…isn’t that the standard you should use to determine whether they are “relationship worthy” and if not, why be in a relationship with them?

Camille: Never he’s a man and needs to figure it out! Women do it everyday…

Yomaira: Lol what? After marriage?! Yall all sounding single as heck. What kind of relationships ya’ll in that you don’t trust your partner to loan them money?!

Ella: When I realize he’s good with money and will not make it a habit. I don’t deal with humans who borrow.

Sandra: Gotta be able judge their character. For example, do they pay their bills on time, have a savings account, etc.

Sincerely: grrr… even in marriage I want to keep my finances separate.. it’ll be an ours, then a his and mines thing. LBKS (Laughing but kinda serious?) I think if your partner is good/responsible enough to mate with and is a mate of their word in other parts of life, it’s no problem loaning money.

Tea: My bf lent me money after 3 months for a family emergency and I was able to pay him back after a month. We are very close and have each others back. So I say only lend money if its important.

Nicole: Never. I’d give it before I loan it.

Vicki: Never…I can give you $20 though…lol

Shelly: After he dead in a coffin or crypt or urn.

Latia: Um . . .what part of the game is that? When you are in a serious relationship no money needs to be borrowed because you have each other’s backs.

Kenya: In the month of Neveruary!

Sonia: I would loan the love of my life money if I had it and he needed it. It’s about the type of person they are. If they are untrustworthy, unreliable, irresponsible then no, but if they are responsible are in need then yes. The time frame depends on how long it takes to prove they are those things.

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  • BklynPeach

    I am likely older than most of you, 60. After the age of 30 I did not date men who could not afford themselves. A grown man should have at least what I have . If a man does not have savings and investments, I assume he has a job or own a business, he is of no interest to me.

  • Marina Calis

    Once your married…all money should become ours however in the past it has not been that way for me…so in the future I would have to protect myself…but of course my husband would have access to what I have as long as I have access to what he has.

  • enlightenment

    Hell no, I’m not loaning anyone money. No one is taking advantage of me. Like others have said, the circumstance would have to be extreme. We all work way too hard to give the fruits of our labor away like that.

  • Ladybug94

    If I had his last name..other than that, he’s a man he can be resourceful and get money elsewhere. I’m old school, where men just don’t ask women for money unless it’s your wife.

    • Nope

      Are you also “old school” regarding gender equality?

  • Kath

    I would never have need to loan my significant other monies. I just cannot, in any way or form tolerate/date a broke dude.

  • Just saying!!

    I keep trying to scroll down to the list of articles on here on my phone and every time I get to a certain point it stops because a stupid advertisement pops up! Ughhhhhh

  • Megan

    Before I got married we didn’t loan each other money but he was starting his own business, after I encouraged him to go into business for himself. Times were hard starting off and I believed in him and what he was doing so if he asked I loaned, yes I received it back. Married 3 years and I don’t mind helping my husband when he needs it, I will always have his back just like he will always have mine.

  • Pingback: True Life: I Wouldn’t Loan Him Money Until… | Blackonomics Magazine()

  • stewwie

    Simple, i don’t lend any money to anyone which i expect to get back. If a friend needs money and I have some, I just give it to them. If they pay it back, fine; if not, fine.

  • Nia

    I don’t know. I don’t borrow money so I don’t like loaning it. We’d have to be together for a nice minute and it’d have to be an emergency. I couldn’t be with a dude who always wants to “borrow” money. A lot of dudes today are looking to be paid by women and I pay no man!

    • Ms. Kameria

      My thoughts exactly. I don’t borrow money from anyone….much less a guy I was dating, so I don’t like to lend it as well. If we are BOTH working hard, there shouldn’t be a need to borrow or lend money anyway. I know someone is going to mention “emergencies” (whatever those are…) but that is what “emergency accounts and savings accounts are for. I love your last statement as well.

  • FromUR2UB

    Why would I want to start that habit? I would consider $20 until payday. The first time someone doesn’t pay me all of it back, they burn the bridge and they know it.