“White People Will Hate My Half-Black Child” White, American Mother Gives Bi-Racial Baby Up For Adoption
We all know that racism exists in America. It’s a known fact; but that doesn’t mean it can’t catch us off guard sometimes. Just today, CNN wrote a story about the rise in interracial, international adoptions. Specifically, European parents are adopting African American babies because they are often the last to be adopted in the states. Interracial adoption is always a controversial issue as some think a child growing up with parents of a different race won’t be able to relate to their cultural identity.
But on the flip side, some see interracial adoption as a way for their children to escape the racism that is so prevalent in American society.
Susan (last name withheld) of Florida decided to give her biracial son up for adoption in 2006 because of the racial discrimination she believed he’d face growing up in the United States. When she went to look at the potential families a social worker gave her three binders containing information about prospective parents. After she looked through the first binder she didn’t need to see anymore. The first contained a couple from the Netherlands. Susan felt a connection. “If my mother had lived, she’d look just like (the prospective Dutch mother).” Susan’s mother died when she was two months old.
Susan also wanted her son to grow up far away from the life she knew. She was a 30-year-old prostitute addicted to crack beginning a prison sentence when she learned she was pregnant. She did not know whether the child’s father was a man who raped her “for hours” or a drug dealer whom she “had done something with” one time, she said. But both men were African American, and she believed the child would face discrimination growing up in the United States.White people are going to hate him because he’s half black … black people are going to hate on him because he’s half white
Susan, birth mother who chose a Dutch family
“There’s too much prejudice over here. The white people are going to hate him because he’s half black, and the majority of black people are going to hate on him because he’s half white,” said Susan, who is Caucasian. “And then he’ll have to do extra things to prove what kind of a Negro he is, and extra things to prove what kind of a honky he is and I don’t want that. I did not want that for my kid.”
Even her own daughter, then aged 11, said “she would never accept that n***** child.”
Now, there’s a good chance that Susan just didn’t want to raise a child by the man who raped her or the drug dealer she did something with. Looking into this boys eyes, no doubt, would have been a painful reminder of some of the trauma she’s experienced in her life. It’s completely understandable and actually admirable that she would choose to give him to a family who could love regardless. The fact that she thought enough to pick a woman who would have looked like her mother is also endearing.
What I find very interesting though are Susan’s concerns about race. Judging by Susan’s daughter’s comments, she might be giving this child up because of her own prejudice or full out racism. And if that’s the case, even though it may sound pretty terrible, she still made the right decision.
Furthermore, does it strike anyone else as interesting that she, a woman who has most likely experienced her own fair share of discrimination because of her past, believes it would be complete hell for a black child to grow up here. In other words, as one Bossip reader put it: “You know life is a mess if a white crack head prostitute thinks the worse thing to be is black in America.”