Help! I Can’t Have Achieve The Big-O Anymore!

August 13, 2013  |  

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From Essence 

Q: I desire to be in a healthy relationship that will lead to marriage more than anything but it seems impossible for me because of three words: premature ovarian failure. I was diagnosed with this condition in my mid 30s and doctors don’t seem to have many answers for it. I am now 42-years-old. It is impacting my life in ways that I wasn’t fully prepared to face.

This condition crept up on me like a thief in the night. I was in the middle of splitting with my husband, and I wasn’t keeping tabs on all of the symptoms that I experienced. I just knew that I didn’t feel like myself and I noticed the night sweats that seemed to keep recurring in the dead of winter. After we got divorced and I started dating again, I started taking notice more and more of the changes in my sexual health.  I had no sex drive, I had not had a period in six months, there was some vaginal dryness and my body ached. I felt like a little old lady in a 35 year old body.

I went to my doctor with my concerns they informed me that my blood work looked like that of an older woman that had been in menopause for years. I almost fell out!

I’m currently on medication for this, but my sexual desire is not what it used to be. I don’t get aroused easily or have orgasms. This frustrates most men that I have dated and they loose interest fast. Or, I end up putting off getting intimate with them because I’m very insecure about my predicament. Men always loose interest because they feel I don’t desire them. How should I handle dating new guys and intimacy moving forward? I don’t want disaster to strike again.

Read Dr. Sherry’s response  at Essence.com 

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