How To Avoid Getting Into A Dead-End Relationship

September 27, 2013  |  
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You’ll know a dead-end relationship when you’re in one, but the idea is to avoid falling into that situation to begin with. In case you haven’t mastered that avoidance tip yet, here are 14 ways to avoid getting into a dead-end relationship.

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Know the signs

There are some obvious signs that you’re in a dead-end relationship. It’s helpful to be aware of these signs so that you can avoid them in the future. Common signs include a lack of communication, boredom, the feeling that you’re settling, and so on. When you feel negatively about a relationship and you can’t see it going very far, clearly it’s a dead-end on the horizon.

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Know yourself

Are you desperate? Tired of being single? Looking for some physical activity in the sheets? Before getting into a relationship, take some time to figure out yourself as well as your purpose for dating. If you’re looking for something temporary or if you’re looking to fill a void, you can all but count on the fact that you’re setting yourself up for a dead-end relationship.

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Know your goals

Why are you in the dating world to begin with? What must have qualities are you looking for in a guy? What makes a man attractive to you? Without knowing your goals, wants, and needs while dating, you may inadvertently walk into a dead-end relationship, even if those aren’t your true intentions. Know what you want and know what your true dating goals really are.

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Remember your time is precious

Dead-end relationships are a waste of time. One of the last things you want to do is waste your time on a man and relationship that is doomed from the beginning. To avoid these types of relationships, remember that your time is precious. You don’t have to, nor should you, want to waste time on something that isn’t going to work. Time is precious, so it’s best to spend it on people who are worth it.

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Don’t hesitate to date around

No one says you can only date one guy at once, in fact you probably shouldn’t. One of the keys to avoiding a dead-end relationship is to date a lot of different people. Date guys who fit your ideal list but also date men who are a bit out of the ordinary. This will allow you to further narrow down the type of guy you want and avoid any serious relationships with people you don’t really want to be with. The dating market is always open.

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Get to know him 100%

Before committing to a relationship with a guy, it’s important that you get to know him 100%. Be sure that you know him inside and out before agreeing to get into a relationship. Blindly getting into a relationship without really knowing the guy can lead to all sorts of problems and, ultimately, a dead end relationship. Dating someone without really knowing him can be problematic.

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Avoid inner and outer pressure

Are your friends pressuring you to date this man? Do you get poked at for having been single for so long? Are you sick of being single? When you date someone out of desperation or because of pressure, it isn’t likely that the relationship will go well. Date a man because you want to and because you connect with him, not because you feel pressured and pushed to do so.

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Be okay with saying no

If you’re really not feeling a certain man that you’ve been seeing or if he’s been sending out a lot of red flags, don’t hesitate to cut him off then. Even if he wines and dines you in hopes of becoming something more, there is nothing wrong with telling a man no. Saying no will keep you out of trouble and it’ll keep you from wasting your time and energy on a relationship that is going nowhere.

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Ask yourself: are you relationship ready?

Being ready and prepared for a relationship is an important part of making a relationship work. If you’re not at the point in your life where you can juggle work, school, and a relationship all at once, you may want to reconsider. Getting into a relationship knowing that you’re already a busy woman will more than likely only lead to wasted time and a dead end road.

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Keep track of red flags

All relationships are bound to have a red flag or two, but in some instances, these red flags start racking up into the double digits. Keep a mental tab of the amount of red flags that this man has set off. If he acts really sketchy and entirely uninterested, you may be destined for a dead-end relationship. Some red flags can be ignored and forgiven, others are a true sign of warning.

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Learn from the past

If you had a dead-end relationship in the past, be sure to learn from it. Though history repeats itself, your dating and relationship history should not. If this new relationship feels like something bad you experienced before, don’t hesitate to break things off as quickly as possible. It’s best for the two of you.

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Don’t settle

Whether you’re unhappy, he’s unhappy, or both, the fact is that no one should settle just because. In fact, when you settle with a guy for one reason or another, it’s obvious that you aren’t in the relationship for the right reasons. Getting into a relationship because you’re lonely or because you want someone to romance you won’t allow you to fulfill your needs for very long. Settling often leads to a bad relationship.

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Make sure you connect on deeper levels

Relationships take a solid foundation in order for anything to last. If you two are only dating because you find each other attractive and because action between the sheets is good, don’t expect the relationship to go far. If you want to avoid a dead-end relationship, you need to make sure that you are able to connect with your partner on a deeper level. Physical likes aren’t enough to support and bond a relationship.

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Avoid unavailable people

Trying to be in a relationship with someone who is unavailable, in all senses of the word, will all but lead to a dead-end relationship. There’s no use in dating a married man as it’ll be a short fling and nothing more. There’s also nothing good to come out of dating a man who is emotionally walled and closed up. Find someone who is available emotionally, physically, and mentally.

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  • Marina Calis

    All of these are so true and everyone matched the last person I even thought of being interested in…This man was immature….and clearly not relationship material.So watch the red flags because they help a lot.

  • SK

    I think as women…we all are somewhat guilty of these things lol… (Sad but true.)

  • Marina Calis

    I wonder if people really read these articles? Like other’s I have let the media influence how I feel,what I do,who I date,how to wear my hair,my hair so much more…but the truth is we have to educate ourselves so that we know which of the stuff to listen to and what to filter.We really should listen very sparingly to media.These articles are put in place to prevent us from having a healthy,fulfilling life.What you see just may not be real.The media controls our minds and keeps us from fulfilling our dreams.The media even destroys marriages and relationships.If a person is uneducated and many of us are….then we wouldn’t know how to decipher the subliminal messages and give into the hype.

  • lashon123

    anyone have any advice for me… im currently going threw a possible break-up, this could be the end of something special, at least I thought was special.. its been 2yrs 9months,as of recently he has been getting text from other women, where he say he been etc don’t add up, it just seem so weird.. it breaks my heart that he could be stepping out, seeing and sleeping with other women..im just so heart broken,, we where friends first and it slowly evolved into something serious..we made sweet love several times, it was just me and him I thought until I seen a pic on fb with another woman with his arm around her.. he looked so out of place in the pics(2).. anyway I cried all night until I fell asleep.. does anyone have any advice on how I can slowly move forward from this? im hurting so bad..its just so deceitful and hurtful how he has done me :'( we’re like best friends, we get along so well.. for him to be doing me like this im just so confused

    • mojo

      hi lashon, i know it sounds hard to do but only time can heal you, however it is up to you to take the hardest step to move on. I had a break up with someone for 5 years and though he didnt cheat he was still emotionally and physically abusive. What helped me move on and staying busy with ME, working, focusing on school, hanging with friend and family. I also lost all contact with him, even though we we’re friends in the beginning we both changed so I outgrown him. It is important to know that there are plenty of men who will value you and not hurt you, but if you do not allow for these changes to happen you are making that sacrifice in staying in a relationship that is not good for you. I don’t know how old you are but trust me when I say 2 years is not that long so you have nothing to lose besides someone who you love. And even though you love them doesn’t mean you have to stay with them…

      • lashon123

        thanks so much, I went into night number 2 last night and it was hard.. today is number 3..i kind of figure that I will focus on something that interest me to take my mind off of him. and I am 28, he’s 27.. I just had never been as close as I had/have been close to him and I dated before him and it was so easy to move on from them. oh gosh, im so impatient to get to several months from now. what me and him had was like a little baby that we raised together. I thought it was just me and him ='( I feel like the walking dead right now as if im in mourning.. ok well thanks again