He Divorced Me For Her And I Don’t Know How To Move Forward; Now What?

July 2, 2013  |  


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From Essence

Dr. Sherry,

My ex walked out on our marriage, divorced me for another woman and married her a few years ago. Since then we have been fighting like never before. There are times when we try to talk and he gives me hints that he is unhappy and he made a mistake, but then the blame game happens and the anger starts all over again. We were married for a long time, so I know him well. He has said this to me as well, but as far as I’m concerned, he made his decision. I don’t know what he wants from me. I get upset because the other woman plays him like a fiddle, pitting us against each other, and still to this day, he still cant figure out what she is doing. I still love him even when I don’t want to. He made a choice to be with this other woman, and now he is miserable. The worst part is, our children are just as miserable and angry at him too. What now?


See what Dr. Sherry had to say on Essence.com

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  • more

    good lord! pick ur self esteem up and get ur self another man smh!!

  • I would recommend she stop sleeping with him and move on with her life. You can love someone but recognize you have no business being in a romantic relationship with them.

  • kierah

    “The other woman plays him like a fiddle”? HUH? He’s playing you like a fiddle and apparently you like it. It’s not enough that he cheated and left you. He’s got to keep you dancing to his tune.

    He figured out how to leave you. He should remember the steps so he could leave his “miserable” life with her.
    The state of his marriage is not your concern. As long as being a good dad, that’s all you need to hear about his life.

  • FromUR2UB

    He’s happy enough. And he’s a manipulator. I’ll bet every time it seems like she’s getting over him, he shows up or calls or something. I doubt that he really wants her back, but likes the idea of her wanting him back, so he feeds that by offering her some remote hope that they can be together again. He’s going to ride that pony as far as it’ll go.

  • vallincia

    No one can rule your mind unless you allow the to. You, and only you, are in control of your mind.

  • IllyPhilly

    All I can say is, it gets better with time and as someone else told me, “Don’t let him live rent free in your mind.”