How To Leave One Man For Another, And Not Make It Messy

24 comments
March 15, 2013 ‐ By Julia Austin
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Most of the time, there is no excuse to leave one person and jump immediately into a relationship with another. If you’re so emotionally prepared to be totally entwined with a new man, you have probably been emotionally checked out of your relationship with your current man for a while. And you should have addressed that a long time ago, instead of bringing things to the point where you just walk out for someone new. However, sometimes, you can think you’re perfectly happy in your relationship, and you just meet someone who changes everything. You see now that your current partner is not right for you, and you can’t un-see that. So what do you do?

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  • On_Point

    strong wh0redom in this post.

  • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

    I’LL TELL THAT MITCH, “IF U LIKED IT THEN YOU SHOULDA PUT A RING ON IT UH UH OH”

    • juice992

      i can tell by the post u put ur a pretty ghetto person lol

  • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

    MEN DROP WOMEN LIKE BAD HABITS, WITH ZERO REMORSE OR CONSIDERATION. UNLESS HE WAS TAKING CARE OF YOU, TELL THAT MITCH “IF U LIKE IT THEN U SHOULDA PUT A RING ON IT”

  • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

    Tell that nigha “DON’T BE A. DEBBIE DOWNER!” Ha ha lmaoooo! Y.O.L.O

  • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

    SMMFH if you ladies waste all this time on someone you don’t even want anymore!??! Fuuuug that MITCH!

  • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

    My beloveds, men will NEVER do all this for you. If they land someone hotter, you’re HISTORY! If you complain, they’ll label you a bitter, crazy STALKER! That being said, skip all these steps and scream, “YOLO you MITCH! Outta my way or I’ll reveal more secrets than VICTORIA! Ha ha lmaooo

    • http://twitter.com/UrFavoriteLatte Moka Latte

      Although I agree with you that men won’t do all this for women (most, anyways), two wrongs don’t make a right If I decided to do something so effed up as leaving one relationship for another, I would rather roll with the tips given than just say EFF IT. It’s already wrong anyway, but there is a way to do everything; and rolling out without a care in the world is worse. One thing that many that do these kinds of things forget, is that what goes around comes around. Even with the argument that men don’t do all these things to protect the woman they are with, that man who does those dirty deeds eventually has those dirty deeds catch up with them. The same goes for women who do those sort of things. I want to treat people the way I want to be treated. So, while they might not do it; if I were to do something so dirty anyway, I would want to not make it any worse.

    • http://twitter.com/UrFavoriteLatte Moka Latte

      I forgot to add that I do agree with you, too; that when a woman voices her opinion how a man has treated her, many will quickly label you as crazy, bitter, delusional, etc. Of course, that is their way of shifting the blame of their dirty deeds; so that they don’t look like the bad guy for screwing you over. Women do it to men, too; though. Men cheat, not all; but many. Women cheat just as much, but are better at hiding it. They have the typical habit of doing the blame-shift of he’s crazy, delusional, didn’t show me enough attention, too.

  • Honesty

    Don’t leave the one you love for the one you like, because the one you like will leave you for the one they love. No one has ever heard that saying? And as soon as you leave and things don’t work out, don’t go crawling back to what good you had before.

    • http://twitter.com/UrFavoriteLatte Moka Latte

      THIS!!!!! I have heard that saying, along with the other one of “all that glitters, ain’t gold”, and “the grass is not always greener”. I have seen it happen too many times. Then, most (whether man or woman) have the nerves to go back and beg the one they wronged for forgiveness and for them to take them back. The grass is green where you water it. Relationships take work, which includes: patience, respect, consideration, forgiveness, communication, love (of course); amongst many other things. Too many are unwilling to put in the work, and would rather just go the easy route of cheating, etc. The worse part is that many who cheat like to cite their partner’s shortcomings as the reason for cheating. How about putting on your big boy/girl pants and taking responsibility for your actions? How about just saying you cheated because you wanted to or because you were tired of the same person? No, it doesn’t sound so pretty; but it is far better than doing the blame-shift. The only person responsible for one’s actions is that person. If your partner’s shortcomings are a problem, discuss how you are feeling with them. If you do this, and try to work on things; and they don’t do anything to improve, break up with them. Yes, breaking up is hard to do; but give a person that you claimed to have feelings for at one time enough respect to do that (rather than lie and cheat). I’m sure the person would be mad, but would appreciate that in the long run; than they would finding out that the person they thought they knew deceived them.

  • bigdawgman

    Wait? You’re going to a relationship while you’re in another one? If you got to know the new dude that well already, aren’t you already cheating???

    • mrbigA47

      Thank you.

    • http://twitter.com/UrFavoriteLatte Moka Latte

      Yep, and it’s funny how the first thing said is to not get physical with the person; as you shouldn’t cheat your way out of a relationship, especially if you decide not to end it. Making an emotional connection with someone is cheating, too; and worse if you ask me. Physical lasts for a short time, while emotional lasts much longer. No one has any business being in contact with someone enough to even make an emotional connection, let alone make such an emotional connection; to the point of wanting to leave the one they are with for the other. I know cheating happens all the time, but giving tips on how to do it as mess-free as possible; is glorifying it. There is no mess-free way to leave one person for another. Heck, although possible; it’s hard enough leaving a relationship mess-free, period. No matter how long you wait to meet family and friends, because of how you got together; how you got together will present a problem. Whether it be in the beginning, a couple years down the line, or 5 years down the line. I’m sure there are some who can name a friend of a friend of a friend, who left someone for someone else and are happy. That is not the norm. It is unhealthy to leave one relationship for another.

  • CC

    Might I add, if the ex does find out about your pending relationship be sympathetic and understanding of his feelings. Just because you’ve decided to leave before leaving doesn’t mean he is at that stage yet so be considerate as you would want someone to give you the same courtesy…….

    • juice992

      haha u know from experiance huh how many have u left

      • CC

        No, a few of my exes have done that to me including my most recent and that was more painful considering he lied his way out of it. Some people don’t care if they damage someone as long as they get what they want. I’m a lover not a fighter. ;)

        • juice992

          sorry to here that and sorry for that comment

          • CC

            It’s okay, I’m good, you live and you learn…..

  • http://shockya.com/ Monique Jones

    I’m glad I haven’t been in this kind of situation yet.

  • Nope

    Not going to click through 15 pages, but women usually already have the next dude in play way before leaving the current one. Relationships and “relationships” are like monkey bars for most women, swinging from one to the next, and sometimes back again.

    • mrbigA47

      The “ready spare” is what makes the whole situation bad. Something should have been communicated before she emotionally “checked out” of the current relationship. Unless it was some monumental deal-breaking activity/action, the opportunity to rectify the situation should have been presented to the current “bird”, with her a willing participant, minus the “bird(s)” in the bush …

      • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

        Only a fool rolls without a spare, sir. Better safe than sorry! Ijs

    • http://twitter.com/UrFavoriteLatte Moka Latte

      The 15 pages was a bit much, as it was a bit repetitive. Some of the pages could’ve been joined together. For example, they could’ve said “wait to tell your friends and wait to tell his friends” on the same page. Or “wait to tell his parents” and “wait to tell your parents” on the same page. We know how the clicks thing goes, though; more money.

No thanks