Third- Party Action: The Benefits of Couples Counseling Before Saying “I Do”

March 9, 2013  |  
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3. Learning to Fight Fair

It goes without saying that most people will have a spat or two with their partner at some point, especially if you’ve been together for a long time. When two people are passionate – or stubborn – it may be hard to get your point across or to listen to what the other person has to say. Discussing your disagreements with a therapist may help you both control an argument so that it doesn’t escalate too far. A counselor could also offer tools on how to fight fair, which means learning a better way to communicate so that one isn’t talking over the other and both parties feel like they’re being heard and both parties feel validated.

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  • Annie

    I’m 41 years old and my husband has recently told me that he wanted out of the marriage and he actually left a few days later, after 21 years of marriage…
    …After the initial shock wore off and I was able to think straight…

    …I was able to persuade him to give me and the marriage another chance…
    …I had to wing it with only the strategies in the “save the marriage” book

  • Jazmine

    Most couples only think counseling is for AFTER the marriage, not before…because they think if they need counseling before the marriage, then they shouldn’t be getting married. Which MAY BE TRUE!! We would probably have a lower divorce rate if people did this. Good advice

  • Nikki

    Where I live, the marriage license fee is $30 more if you don’t go to pre-marital counseling. I think it’s a great way to discuss topics that make you uncomfortable, such as finances or grounds for divorce-if any. The marriage counselor might bring up something that you may have forgotten to talk about, like TV or no TV in the bedroom.