True Life: The Worst Thing He Called My Love Below Was…

March 7, 2013  |  
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Perhaps because the female, reproductive sex organ is so hidden, so mysterious, so misunderstood that people all over the world try to find the perfect words and phrases to explain the wonder down under. Some of them are clever. Some are sweet and endearing. But some of them are a hot azz mess. We asked you, our Facebook and Twitter followers what were some of the worst things you’d heard people call a vag1na? The answers were some kind of hilarious. Check them out. By the way if you were unaware, the word vag1na comes from a Latin word meaning “sheath” or “sword cover.

Jacquis: Pu##y. Hate that word

Tracy: My mom used to call it secret private no no place

Miosha: Pink Cookies

Ken: The old people on my family say “giddy”…..smh

Lakesha: Chum – the ish deep sea fishermen throw off the side of boats to attract large fish – basically fish innards and ground up misc fish


Source: iStock

Janét: What about Poontang…..Ew!

Adrienne: I once heard this guy call this young girl’s ‘situation’ a hot dumpster in the summertime…true story



Faith: Meat curtains

Marie: I heard a woman call it a sugar bowl. What was really bad was that she was explaining “bad touch” to a little girl, and said how it would make her sugar bowl wet. Very disturbing.

Carol: Nazty cat trap!

Meka: Fur burger


Clynethel: Nappy dug out

Dorian: Wet wet! I HATE that!!


Source: Shutterstock

Cherie: Split tail. Ugh! heard that in a movie

Khanti: Fat rabbit…effin 2chainz



Dina: A male friend of mine loved to call it sugar walls

Giovanna: A split knish… –_–


Ash De Nor: I’ve heard a man refer to one as a one piece nugget w/ extra sauce. Disgusting.

Vickie: My co-worker said she met this guy who woke her “little girl” up. (It had been a while…)

Source: Ben & Jerry’s

Fannie: Chunky monkey

Lisa: Roast beef curtains if you have long inner labia.


Traci: Baconpuss

Sheletta: Koon pappy



Renee: Cherry pie… That sounded so perverted to me.. I cant eat cherry pie till this day due to him….

Sandi: Come-hole (I slapped the taste buds clean out of her)


Belle: Sweetness

Elizabeth: Situation like there is an issue added to it lol

Renata: “Good Good”……but I like this name

TrebeleClef: Its not what he called it, its what he did to it. He SPIT in mine! narsty A$$ n***a!!!

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  • Denetra Anderson

    Maybe “Treble Clef” was dry or maybe there was a taste he didn’t like so instead of stopping he just got it extremely wet to get rid of the taste.

  • Patricia Andry

    Cookies. Peaches.

  • P C


  • Fillmore

    Panty hamster

  • Sherm

    Bearded clam.

    • Sherm

      Maybe that one doesn’t make sense now that ladies don’t have hair down there

  • AJ389

    Just changed my name to Officially Grossed Out. Monkey is outrageously offensive.

  • ahh-ha

    My fam used to call it a quack quack.

  • tsuki2

    I remember Hoo-Ha being the term I heard growing up

  • Dani

    -_______- my cousin calls hers a coo coo hole

  • CoCo Lee

    My granny used 2 call it a Pocketbook lol… Didnt understand why until i got older lol

  • Boo

    my mom used to call it a frog 0.o

  • A friend of mine almost got divorced because he said his wife’s “honey pot” looked like a pork rind, so he was going to start using the name porky! AAhhhh!!!!!!

  • bigdawgman

    Dang, I’m surprised I didn’t see “stank”, “tuna”, “womb”, “guts”, “slit”, “wet doughnut”, etc. on here. Or maybe guys only say that around each other. And No! I do not use those terms.

  • BklynBedstuychica

    Bwhahhahahhaha these comments have me screaming at work!!!! Well growing up in Brooklyn and coming from a West Indian family I have always hated the word punani!!!! Blech!!

    • BklynBedstuychica

      Oh yes and I forgot some other terms I heard growing up and even now as an adult that I can’t stand like pum pum, fur burger, and oh yes my best friends Bajan grandmother calls it “the hairy purse”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMBO!


    Juice box, couchie, my grandmother RIP called it Goat…she would say “go wash yo goat” lol

    • bigdawgman


  • kierah

    A guy asked me when I would let him bust my “t#at bone”. Needless to say he never got within a foot of my “pretty”.

  • Starry Eyed

    when talking to my daughter’s I refer to it as “China”. got that from my wife and kids

  • Nappy Dug Out!! LOL they took it back to them Parliament/ Funkadelic days!

  • Dichu eba realy lub mehSteebie

    I hate derogatory names for something that represents us and supposed to be seen as beautiful and mysterious.

  • Bren

    Hot box and ILL-nana (barf…)

  • Janelle

    I HATE to hear a guy say “tw@t”.

    • bigdawgman

      I hate to hear ANYBODY say that! Or the C word!

  • FAMURattler85

    “Koon pappy”??! I just died. Lmao! I’m gonna start using that one. Anywho, my grandmother used to call it a “pocket book”, which got rather confusing since she also used the term when referring to her purse.

    • Dichu eba realy lub mehSteebie

      My grandmother called it the same thing lol! Must have been an old folks thing

  • boo

    Poon poon

  • Cokeland

    Crunch. Why the old lady to it as that but she.did lol

  • Spottieottiedopaliscous

    My cousin called her vagina a “goozy”. Smh

  • Duckface


  • JaneDoe

    I have had only one guy name my cooch “doe” bc he claimed he felt like playdoe.. He was a weirdo anyway..

    • It must have been extra dry boo! Would die if man said my cooter felt like clay.

      • OMG OMG OMG OMG your response just made my heart race! Bwahahahahahaaa

  • Kutta_MoFo

    I think ‘That Monkey’ is by far the tackiest, I mean who thought of that shyt? Cuunt is just disgusting and disrespectful.

  • cool

    Coochie is one of the most used in this region. I don’t think I care much for terms that are gross or degrading in any way

  • Sagittarius81

    My mom always refer vagina as “tee-tee” growing up.

  • Aaliyah Noelle

    Lmfao…. Naming a vagina….. NOOOO DONT DO THAT

  • Shay

    What exactly is a “VAGLNA”? Spell check, please!

    • Drew Smith

      I think they have to spell a number of words a certain way because of the content rules their web hosting company has in place.