Ask A Very Smart Brotha: We Just Found Out He Has Newborn Twins, Should I Try To Work It Out?

January 30, 2013 ‐ By


Erica: I just got into a discussion about what marriage is suppose to mean and I want a guy’s take on it. I say: Love is not unconditional and that everyone has dealbreakers in which they will leave a relationship or marriage. Including weight gain. Others say: If you’re married, then the only dealbreaker should be don’t cheat and don’t abuse me.

What say you?

DY: I say the best relationships/marriages are when you find someone whose dealbreakers match yours.

Denise:  At what age do men grow up ?

DY: The age we realize “continuing not to grow up” means “dammit, the pool of women available to me will continue to shrink until I grow up.” Some of us make that transition, and some don’t because their pool never shrinks. There’s no incentive to make the change.

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  • kierah

    To Rachael – ask your husband what you can do to make things better. Read The 5 Love Languages. You may be doing everything you can think of, but that doesn’t mean he’s programmed to respond to it. Find out what his love language is and speak it daily until you become fluent.

  • kierah

    “Still, you both need to take a big step back from this relationship—him because he needs to figure out how to feed two mouths, and you because nothing about “my new man has twin newborns by a different woman” is hot in the streets.

    I mean, if the roles were reversed and you were knocked up with twins
    and didn’t know who the dad was, do you think he would stay?”

  • anonymouse

    If you have to ask should you work it out with a man who claims that he just found out that he has newborn twins, then you are a damn fool. That’s all

    • wizdom

      Lmao. EXACTLY.