Facing The Truth: Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused By Your Man

February 1st, 2013 - By Ashley Page

Even though emotional abuse doesn’t leave physical marks, it is said to be the hardest type of abuse to understand and escape. Emotional abuse can occur in the many relationships and for those impacted, stick and stones may break their bones, but words will never hurt them. Here are 15 signs that your relationship is emotionally abusive.

"Unhappy couple on a couch pf"

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He puts you down.

Us women love compliments, that’s a fact. If your guy talks down to you and makes you feel like less than who you really are, it’s time to reconsider. No man is worth losing your self-esteem or self-confidence over.

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  • lala x

    he failed that test. i ran. now im all alone
    and he failed that test ..but does it matter b/c he didnt really want me anyway n im all alone

  • RenJennM

    This was me last year. Pretty much all of it. He was belittling, condescending, smug, vile, argumentative, and could care less about how I was feeling or what I was going through. He once said to me: “My words will make you stronger. Ask my friend: she used to think I was really f***ed up, but now she’s used to it”. Had he been just my “friend”, maybe I would’ve gotten used to it. In fact, my friends and I often take verbal jabs at each other… all in jest, of course. But he was the guy I was in love with. When you’re in love with someone, you’re vulnerable to them, so their words and opinions of you cut deeper.

  • York

    Even though this article said the same thing using different wording in a few slides, it’s all true. I’ve been there, done that, and don’t plan on repeating the experience!

    I want to add that you should also pay attention to men who always want to tag along with you wherever you go, or want overly detailed explanations as to your whereabouts or plans for the day. It’s a form of control and really unnecessary if the relationship is healthy.

    • Babydoll 70

      I’ve been in my share of controlling relationships but I have a friend whose guy would call her and ask where she was and she told him she was in her car driving to work, well he asked her to honk her horn and to turn the radio up to prove she was in the car. No lie.

  • Gaylyn

    My mother is in an emotionally abusive relationship with my stepfather. It’s hard to sit back and watch her endure and not stand up for herself (she comes from an abusive background where her self esteem is broken amongst other things, but that’s another story for another day). I’ve watched him call her out of her name, scream at her and other things. During college it was the worst where she and I got into it because I stood my ground with him. Every time I did that or said anything about him buying me a car or the fact that she and him have set me up financially in case anything happens to her. No amount justifies any type of abuse. Things got so bad that I moved out to save my sanity. Now I’m back since by oldest brother died and I help her out with my younger brother (whose mentally challenged). She doesn’t know that the situation has had me in and out of therapy for years. Now to cope so that I don’t lose myself, I’ve turned back to God and seeking spiritual counseling. Even though I’m back at home due to my financial situation, I feel like God (through my spiritual counselor) has informed me that it’s time to put myself first and I’m going to have to separate myself from a dysfunctional family. She told that if my mother feels like having a huge house to leave to me in my will is more important than have a sense of self esteem through God than that’s her issue and at my age, I have to start putting myself first.

  • Plumbline

    If they say they love you, judge them by this measure. God has called us to freedom, not to be selfish, but free to love……..Get out of an abusive relationship especially if your not married yet……and be strong enough not to go back. Ask Jesus for protection, strength, and wisdom…..

    ……..1 Corinthians 13:4-7………..

    4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things………..

    ……Romans 13:10……..Love does no harm to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

    • Dolo

      I agree with you about judging your significant other by their measure.. I was in a emotionally abusive situation for a while but just removed myself from the situation.
      He asked me to marry him after 3 yrs and after looking back at those 3 yrs I asked him one question: what have you done for me in the the three yrs of this relationship to make me want to say yes to your proposal. Granted it wasn’t all bad but some some things hold more weight than others. He had nothing so with nothing said I knew enough was enough. When a man call himself being in love with you there should always be a level of respect for the other person that will make them want to treat that person like they mean something to them.

      • Plumbline

        Absolutley Dolo……You made the right choice, and gained insight and perspective from it. Sadly, many don’t. We need discernment more than ever in relationships these days…..God Bless…..

        ….Philippians 1:9…..
        And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment……