Resolutions Every Black Girl Should Make: No More Excuses

January 4, 2013  |  

I had a friend in college who would walk around spouting this one quote over and over again. He was a little extra in life, so initially I didn’t pay much attention to him. But eventually I started to listen and I realized what he was saying actually made a whole lot of sense. The quote, by Stephen Grayhm, goes something like this: “Excuses are tools of the incompetent used to build monuments of nothingness.” It goes on to say, “Those who use them seldom amount to anything.” I don’t remember him reciting that last part, probably because it’s a bit far-fetched. We’ve all made excuses at one point or another.

I can’t go to the gym because it’s too cold outside.

I can’t go to school because I don’t have enough money.

I can’t quit this job and apply for another because I’m too tired after work.

I don’t have the right qualifications.

They might not like what I have to say or offer.

We’ve gotten so good at making excuses that oftentimes we don’t even recognize when our reasoning is valid and when we’ve made them up to hide our own fear or insecurities. While I won’t argue that people who make excuses will never amount to anything, I will say that we miss out on what God has for our lives when we rationalize our way out of opportunities.

Earlier this week, at my church’s New Year’s/Watch Night service my childhood pastor encouraged the whole congregation and especially me by saying that if God has shown you something, or revealed something to you, He will be there with you as you go about the business of achieving it.

He said, if you have a vision or dream to be somewhere, you have to believe that God, if you believe, and…the universe if you don’t, will provide the provision to see that dream through. If you look at any success stories, you’ll notice that there’s almost always a level of sacrifice and a period of struggle before these individuals got to where they dreamed of being.

So in 2013, if you’re not a fan of resolutions, start paying more attention to your own mental chatter. What are you saying to yourself? Are the reasons why you can’t do something, real legit hurdles or are they ways to keep yourself from admitting that you’re scared to step out there, put yourself out there or take the risk of investing in yourself.

Everything might not go perfectly, it might not always go smoothly but instead of making yet another excuse, start where you are, use what you’ve got, do what you can.

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  • Pingback: La Scandaleuse » En 2013, je ne me trouve plus d’excuses !()

  • psylocke_2001

    Don’t hesitate, do. That’s going to be my motto from this point forward.

  • Na Na


  • desi

    Thank you so much mn! I needed this so bad!!! This touched my soul. Gracias!!!!!!

  • DTJ

    Last March I took my idea for a blog and turned it into a small business. My friend, a businessman, kept saying “you have something go with it. Just do it like Nike.” So when I purchased my license I was scared….as HAYELL lol but it was worth it. Now i’m pursuing my business management degree to be competitive against those that may not take me seriously. This article just made me remember that I made the right choice. I’m working to be my own boss!

  • Nickname

    Well put. Thanks

  • Kaori

    What kind of resolutions should Black WOMEN make?

    • TRUTH IS

      Does it matter what race?? Women face similar problems everywhere

      • Kaori



  • Random Girl

    Thank you for posting this article. This is exactly what I needed to confirm what God was already telling me. I’ve used excuses for way to long and have been getting in my own way.

  • How come articles like these don’t get millions of comments? Why? because MN readers only care about relationships and interracial relationships….

    anyway, I whole-heatedly agree! Its funny because I was actually saying this a few weeks ago…that i need to stop telling myself what i can’t do and just go for it. No more excuses. Im going to school regardless of the financial situation. Im gonna apply for scholarships, I’m gonna look for jobs everyday or every other day until i find one. It feels good to have this energy and motivation, especially for the new year.

  • Cece334

    Thanks for this encouraging article! I’m moving out of my own way this year. It’s all about thinking positively!

  • Cece334

    Thanks for this encouraging article! I’m moving out of my own way this year. It’s all about thinking positively!


    Kudos to me for hitting the gym in my lunch hr on one of the coldest day today. I am qualified I just need to find a new, challenging job and a second one on the weekend; or start my own business. I have the ideas just need to execute them. I need money to do my MBA. How can I go about that….its the harsh reality that I do not hv the $$ to do it right now. Accept me or keep it moving has always been my motto!! LADIES WE CAN DO IT!!!