- You haven’t really gotten over your past relationship and it’s holding you back – Most people come out of relationships wounded to some extent. They may not have turned into bad people or they may not have been treated badly, but they’re slightly wounded. Sometimes, people are just emotionally drained after a relationship. Relationships are also like systems, each one operates in its own way. When you move on to the new relationship, you have to move on to the new relationship and leave the old one in the past. It’s not something you’ll work at, it’s something you just have to do.
- You change when you get in a relationship – Men aren’t the only ones who get comfortable in relationships, women do it too. It’s not even the comfort zone people who struggle, sometimes it’s the people who dial it up too fast. It’s those women who see everything from the point of being single to a relationship as a challenge and goal, but then once they are in a relationship, their eyes go immediately to marriage. It takes a lot for a man to commit in a relationship, if you turn around right away and start talking moving in together and marriage, he’s out. On the flipside, if you get way too comfortable in a relationship because you think that’s it’s harder to get out of a relationship than get into a relationship, you will soon find out just how foolish your thoughts are.
- You don’t change when you get in a relationship – “Relationships shouldn’t change you” – FALSE. Of course your relationship will change you, if anything, you’re no longer single and you need to behave like it. A lot of things are cool when you’re in the courting phase; you can go out each Thursday night with the girls for happy hour, spending time together is planned and not expected, you make the pursuit of a relationship a priority instead of the actual relationship. But then, you ‘re in that relationship and you realize that in order for the relationship to be successful you’re going to have to make some changes. When you don’t make those changes, he starts to think that the person he thought you would grow and develop into will actually never show up. (Note that I said, grow and develop and not change. I know you people will love to jump at an opportunity to think someone is trying to change you.)
- You make a great girlfriend, but not a great wife – Chile… Most women think that men sit around talking about money, h*es and rims. OK, we do, but we also talk about women who will make great wives versus great girlfriends. When men are talking about their relationship, they have this look on their face that’s almost to say, “She’s a great girl but she’s just not the one I’ll be with in the long run.” When the man comes to this conclusion, sometimes after he’s already in the relationship, he’ll try and wait it out for a bit. No matter how hard he tries, he’ll eventually admit to himself that there’s nothing about this girl that he sees long term and it’s better to be single than in a relationship just to be in a relationship.
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