From Black Voices
The holiday season for millions around the world is a time to celebrate with friends and loved ones, and it was once like that for the family of Phoenix Coldon, a missing Missouri college student who disappeared shortly before Christmas last year.
But time and circumstance have robbed the Coldon family of its joy and its desire to celebrate. Those feelings have been replaced by grief, sorrow and regret.
It was one year ago Thursday that Phoenix Coldon, then 23, vanished without a trace — 12 months since the missing woman’s mother, Goldia Coldon, has seen her young daughter’s face, 365 days since she and her husband have been able to smile, laugh or hug their daughter.
“We had no idea that we would be at Dec. 18, 2012, and Phoenix would still be missing. If someone had told me that I would have said ‘no, I don’t think so. We’ll be able to find her.’ But here it is, Dec. 18, 2012, and we are still no closer to finding Phoenix than we were on Dec. 18, 2011,” Goldia Coldon told The Huffington Post.
The past year, the Coldons said, has felt like a lifetime of fear and agony.
“This has been most stressful, awful thing my husband and I have gone through in our life,” Goldia Coldon said. “I’ve cried every day — every single day — since our daughter disappeared. I did not know that a person could cry that much.”
Phoenix Coldon was last seen at about 3 p.m. on Dec. 18, 2011, in the driveway of her family’s St. Louis County, Mo., home. Roughly three hours later, Coldon’s black 1998 Chevy Blazer was impounded by police after it was discovered about a 25-minute drive from her home, at Ninth Street and St. Clair Avenue in East St. Louis. The keys were in the ignition with the motor running and the driver’s door open.
Coldon’s tears are not the tears of a mother mourning a death. Her tears are shed for the unknown — the pain of not knowing where her daughter is or why she has vanished.
“I just cannot imagine what has happened to Phoenix,” she said in a shaky voice. “I don’t know the reason or the circumstances. We don’t know if she is alive, we just believe that she is.”
More than one holiday has passed since she disappeared. One of the more painful milestones for her family was her 24th birthday on May 23. There was no cake, no presents and no celebration, only a lonely reminder for friends and family that her disappearance remains a mystery.
“I often find myself going into her room and sitting,” Goldia Coldon said. “Most times I kneel beside her bed. There’s a cross above her bed and I just pray. I say, ‘Lord, I know you can hear me. I know you’re probably tired of me, but I have to do this and if you’re tired of me there’s only one way to get rid of me and that’s to let Phoenix come home’.”
Read more at Black Voices