Ask A Very Smart Brotha: He Wants To Wear A Cape During Sex…
My name is Kween and I need a lil bit advice and somewhat a reality check for today… I’m a lesbian in a relationship that has been off and on for almost 4 years with a stud who I love dearly. The only problem is she’s 26 and can’t hold a damn job…(smdh). I’m 31 and have 2 children… I provide very well for them but I feel like I’m supporting and catering to her too much… I really wanna just wash my hands but I’m afraid to be alone… In your opinion, what should I do?
Hey Kween (Is that your real name?), thanks for writing in. Now, I have been many things in my life—teacher, basketball player, spades champion, asshole, etc—but I have never been a lesbian. And, since I’ve never been a lesbian, I’ve never been in a lesbian relationship. Still, I can’t imagine lesbian relationships being that much different than male-female couplings. With that being said, I’ll give you the same advice I’d give a straight woman (or man). u won’t be able to continue the relationship unless she gives you some help.
If you feel like her lack of income/drive/ambition is hurting the relationship…then it’s hurting the relationship. There are some people who are okay with being with someone who doesn’t bring much to the table financially, and that’s okay. It’s also okay if you happen to be the type of person who’d like for their significant other to be able to pay something other than attention. Since you’re one of the latter, I don’t see a problem with letting her know that as much as you love her, yo
As far as the not wanting to be alone thing, that’s an understandable feeling. But, Kween, you’re a 31 year old woman. If you do decide to break up, you may be alone for a while, but chances are that you will eventually meet someone who you can be happy with. There are millions of other fish in the sea—Literally millions. The sea is full of damn fish. Some beautiful. Some with missing fins. Some who haven’t even been discovered yet—and don’t spend any more time holding on to a spoiled one just because you think you can’t catch anymore.