We Ain’t Saying You’re A Gold Digger — But This Behavior Makes You Look Like One

December 11, 2012  |  
"Gold digger pf"

Trying to evaluate if your priorities are in the right place while looking for love? Wondering why every guy you date eventually spooks? Or, are you just a real life gold digger, trying to be a little more stealth about it? Here are 14 behaviors that make you look like a gold digger — whether you are one or not!

black woman with friends

Your friends are gold diggers

You are judged by the company you keep, and while you might think it’s entertaining to keep around that girlfriend who has crazy stories about the trips and gifts her billionaire boyfriends buy her, any man you may date will be terrified of that friend — and, as a domino effect, terrified of you. They’ll assume you’re just a GD in training!

"Couple having drinks at a restaurant pf"

You don’t even consult him on the restaurant

In a situation in which the guy is clearly going to pay—your birthday dinner, or a date that he invited you on—and he says, “You pick the place!” and you always pick the pricier places, never even asking him if that’s okay. In fact, you don’t even seem to entertain the idea that budget might be an issue. As far as you’re concerned, it shouldn’t be.

"Bucket of champagne pf"

You ask to “come along” on his business trips

You offer yourself up as “company” or “entertainment” when he has long, tedious business trips to go on. And, since business trips typically go on the business’ credit card, you know very well you won’t have to pay for that one. Asking to be added to your guy’s business itinerary is like asking to be an added user under a black card.

"Jealous woman pf"

You’re extremely jealous

Some women are jealous for emotional reasons; others are simply guarding their resources! Now, a jealous woman does not a gold digger make, but a gold digger is almost always jealous. A lot more than just her heart depends on her man’s loyalty. So do her rent, her wardrobe, and her Hawaiian getaway…therefore she doesn’t want her man’s money going to things outside of her “needs.”

"blackwomansmile PF"

You often use your looks to get what you want

With a little flirtation and cleavage, you get a free drink, or an item taken off the bill, or a better price on something everywhere you go. If that behavior is so deeply ingrained in your daily activity, what guy isn’t going to suspect that you are using your looks and charm to get something out of him!

"annoyed woman pf"

You can’t go with the flow

You get to the restaurant where you have a reservation. The place is packed and they give you a tiny table in the back. You are outraged. You think that for some reason you deserved one of those better tables more than the other people who also had reservations. This just shows that you are so accustomed to first class treatment, your head is too in the clouds to even think about the poor waiter who has been yelled at a dozen times tonight, or the stressed out hostess just trying to pay rent. All you think about is what you want. And that is very gold digger-esque behavior.

"Shopping at a department store pf"

 

You care greatly how a man dresses

What’s the first thing you notice about a man who approaches you—does he wear designer labels? Is he in a suit worthy of a CEO office? Is he in clothing suitable for a yacht? You pick up immediately on these things, indicating that a show of status is crucial to you. It’s not a perk—it’s the point.

angry black female pf

 

Your career decisions are based on money

If you’ve sold your soul, or at least your dignity and passion, a few times over for a better buck, it’s safe to say you wouldn’t date a guy who was in a job he loved, but a very low-paying one. Why should you, who’s given up anything worth living for (again: soul, dignity, passion) be with a broke man?! You gave it all up for the money! You think your men should do the same.

black female sad at work pf

You have no career ambitions

On the flip side you seem to be ambling along at a dead end job, but not worried about that fact. As if one day, you won’t just not have to do that job anymore…you won’t have to do any work. You appear pretty confident in the knowledge that something (or someone) is just going to “save you” from your situation. So you take no responsibility for it.

"bored couple pf"

You don’t perform acts of kindness

That doesn’t even have to mean paying for things. It could mean that when your guy is sick, you don’t bring him soup. When he’s had a long day, you don’t make dinner. It doesn’t even occur to you that the other person should be getting something out of this relationship.

"Couple talking pf"

You ask indirect questions about how much money he does or can make

What’s the best position somebody in your company can get to? The owner of your company, what’s his life like? I have a friend thinking of investing some money; do you think your company would be a good gamble? (Translation: are you or do you have potential to become rich?)

"Housekeeper pf"

You speak poorly of those with lesser jobs

The plumber, the waiter, the maid…you think, “How awful their life must be.” You can’t even see the potential upside of certain jobs, even if they are low paying. The fact that a small dollar sign is attached to somebody’s career instantly makes images of poverty, one-bedroom-apartments split by 4 people and TV dinner’s pop into your head.

"Woman on date PF"

You ask what kind of dates a guy and his exes used to go on

This is a very sneaky way to find out how loaded a guy is, and how much of that load he’s willing to share with women. It looks like you’re just wondering what sorts of things a guy likes to do, or what his past girlfriends were like. It seems so innocent and not superficial at all. But not to a smart guy.

"Woman moving boxes pf"

You’ve lived with every boyfriend you’ve had

If never once you’ve had to be responsible for your rent entirely on your own, and/or you’ve lived with boyfriends in homes that there is no way you could have covered even a portion of the rent for on your salary, somebody’s going to raise an eyebrow.

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  • Guest

    Why is the 2nd picture named “black woman with friends”? Why not just “3 friends” or “women having drinks”?

  • Sharon

    I know this is a waste of time. I hope people ( especially black men) know that is is not only black women are gold diggers. You have gold diggers in all races, White, Asian, Latino, Bi-racial, Arabic, etc. I am so tired of people catagorized gold diggers as black women and accept it when you have women of other races and they don’t have not one problem with it.

  • TRUTH IS

    That phrase is tired; it should join YOLO.