It Must Be Your Looks ‘Cuz It Ain’t Your Smarts: Celebs Who Have More Beauty Than Brains

December 10, 2012  |  

They say you can’t trust a big butt and a smile, but what about a big butt with a smile and no brains to go with it? Looks will get you far in Hollywood — very far actually — but there’s still something a little unnerving about people with all this money, power, and fame, and no good common sense or even book smarts to go with it. We’re not mad at these marginally clueless celebs, we’re just saying…

Kimbella

Kimbella

She’s lost the baby weight and she looks great. But Kimbella is giving dumb blonde a whole new meaning for black women. She’s done a lot to support people’s assumptions that she’s just a vapid model. But get this, she told Sister to Sister that she has a Master’s Degree. I’m going to need to see that sheet of paper because I don’t believe it.

Porsha Stewart

Porsha Stewart

Porsha Stewart hasn’t been on the Real Housewives of Atlanta for very long, but it’s already clear that she’s kind of dingy. At the end of the day, she can say at least she’s pretty — even if she thinks there are only 265 days in a year.

Beyonce

Beyonce

Bey isn’t dumb, but if you have to be smart to be a good actress, a low IQ would explain a lot. Truthfully,I never would have stopped to think about Beyonce’s brains before Wendy Williams put her on blast and said she sounds like she has a 5th grade education — except for that tragic Larry King interview a few years back. I’ll be sure to put the Closed Captioning on when I check out her new documentary.

Jessica SImpson

Jessica Simpson

This is a list of celebs who have more beauty than brains and we all know that Jessica Simpson qualifies if she’s dumb enough to think Buffalo wings come from Buffalos. Thankfully, her clothing and shoe lines are helping to make up for some of her mental deficiencies, but we’ll never forget her confusion over tuna really being chicken of the sea.

Tyrese

Tyrese

We didn’t know Tyrese was dumb until he started Tweeting. Publicly sharing your thoughts isn’t for everybody. Here’s just one of his most nonsensical Twitter gems:

If you’re not already following Tyrese on Twitter, you should @Tyrese and get some “wisdom” from the “Vision Implementer”. Or, better yet, try this hilarious parody page @TyreseWisdoms by some dude who calls himself Black Charmander. Lol. Now I can’t get the image of Tyrese jumping out of a Poke Ball out of my head.

Eva Pigford

Eva Pigford

Eva Pigford is drop dead gorgeous. When she made her TV debut on America’s Next Top Model I remember thinking, “this girl is going to go far”. But that never really happened for Eva. She bounced around a few straight-to-TV movies and a few guest appearances and that was it. And I’m starting to think it’s because she’s not very bright. I’ve been watching Girlfriend Confidential and Eva is silly, dingy and refuses to follow her agent’s advice. Looks like beauty by itself can only take you so far.

Gwenyth Paltrow

Gwenyth Paltrow

Gwenyth Paltrow is my favorite beautiful dummy because she’s both pretentious and dumb. If you haven’t checked out her blog GOOP, you have to. It’s about as brilliant as you would expect from someone that named their baby Apple. She gives incorrect medical advice like “I am convinced that it is possible by eating biological foods to prevent a tumor.” And she says unbelievably pretentious things like “I would rather die before I let myself eat Cup-A-Soup.”

Shaquille O'neal

Shaq

Shaq may be big and hot — to some — but he’s not the brightest lightbulb in the box. When he said “Our offense is like the Pythagorean Theorem: there is no answer!” many thought he was using words that he didn’t understand but since he’s recently earned a PhD, it’s come to be understood that he’s book smart with no common sense — hence his romantic history and conflicts on the court. Why don’t you stick to playing basketball and dating Flava Flav’s cast offs?

Kim Kardashian

Kim K.

Kim is just about as beautiful as she is dumb. But even though some of us find Keeping Up With The Kardashians painful to watch, her string of A-List boyfriends prove that people aren’t really concerned with what’s coming out of Kim Kardashian’s mouth. But she has been smart enough to keep herself relevant despite not having anything to contribute to society besides a big behind. Maybe she has publicity smarts, just not book smarts.

Stacey Dash

Stacey Dash

You know why Stacey Dash made it on the list. As a black woman, she can’t have too many brain cells to rub together if she endorsed Mitt Romney. He is a member of a religion that believes that black skin is the mark of the devil. The Mormon Church didn’t allow black people to join until 1978. And they only did it then because they would lose their tax-exempt status if they didn’t. That’s dumb Stacey. Just dumb.

Nicki Minaj

Nicki/Roman

Nicki Minaj is so dumb even her rap battles are stupid. She called Lil’ Kim a Stupid Hoe. Then Lil’ Kim called her a stupid hoe back. It’s all those goofballs could think of. But Nicki Minaj is on my list for the same reason Stacey found her way there: endorsing Romney. She said that she was voting for the Mormon candidate because “b—–s are messing up the economy”. She may have just been joking but I’d still appreciate it if someone would turn her microphone off.

Draya Michele

Draya Michelle

Draya Michelle is a classic example of a woman who puts too much emphasis on her looks and not enough on having good sense. Need an example? Just check out her Twitter page. When she’s not yapping at women she thinks may be after her man, she’s making dumb decisions that will effect her career: like walking off of the King Magazine shoot, throwing shades on her fellow cast members and generally making sure that her 15 minutes of fame don’t last very long.

Chris Brown

Breezy

Chris Brown belongs here for this Tweet alone:

Maybe Breezy and Porsha went to the same school. Add Breezy’s dumb tweets to the fact that he’s dumb enough to let his temper get in the way of his millions, then you have an attractive man who has more than earned his place on this list.

Tyson Beckford

Tyson

Tyson Beckford is the kind of beautiful, dumb model that journalists love. Every time he gives an interview, he gets caught out there talking trash. First it was about Tyra. And now this is what he had to say about his current girlfriend:

“When I found her (Shanina Shaik) she was a regular girl. I helped place her with the right people, get her teeth cleaned, her body toned up. Everything changed and now everyone wants a piece of her. I hear people say, ‘You can do better than Tyson.’ I’m like, ‘Really? Really?! I created her!’

You have to be working with limited intelligence to say that about someone that you’re coming home to later. Needless to say they’re not together anymore. Now Tyson is using his limited brain power to find his way back to fame via a sex tape. Maybe someone should tell him that a) that’s old and b) releasing a sex tape only works for women.

Allen Iverson

AI

Do you ever sit back and dream about what you’d do if you made it big enough to have millions of dollars at your disposal? Well if you’re dumb and beautiful like Allen Iverson, you’d spend it all recklessly and end up just as broke and busted as you were before. According to TMZ, Allen makes just $64,000 per month but spends $350,000 per month. He’s not even smart enough to hire someone to do the simple math for him. Soon he’ll only have his good looks to rely on.

Trending on MadameNoire

View Comments
Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN
  • word

    I never thought..’smart’ and immediately connected these people…I expect them to be stupid. If you said…Gayle King or Natalie portman or Yaya..then I would be shocked…

  • word

    having a master’s degree…means nothing. It could be from a ‘university’ in a small town in India… or worst yet online. To have an ACCREDITED degree is what gives it meaning

  • Pink

    I don’t agree with Beyonce being dumb.I had a colegue in college that is very intelegent, her essays were always very creative and brilliant, but she had dificult on expressing herself and if you didn’t knew her you would thought that she was dumb.Beyonce may have a team, but she is the one that most of the times has the ideas, and she is very creative.I think Beyonce has evolved a lot since she first started.And Wendell is just press that she isn’t tha sucessful….lol

  • NICKI WAS NEVER VOTED 4 MITT WHY DO PEOPLE TAKE SONG LYRICS SO SERIOUSLY? DID U BELIEVE SHE HANGING ON A BEACH WITH A ZOMBIE 2? SMDH TF OUTTA HERE

  • gallantgesture

    Any Black person who would embrace the Mormon or Islamic belief systems can be convinced that in a tuxedo King Kong could pass for handsome, whereby they’d invest in a company that makes tuxedos for gorillas hoping to get rich.

  • Garagely

    Really?? They’re dumb just because they voted for a political candidate you don’t like? The stupidity and ignorance of this list is unbel

  • wolverine37

    Meg Butler is dumb because she didn’t check her facts. Blacks could be Mormons before 1978. They just didn’t have the priesthood.

  • Bully Article

    I think this article is the equivalent of bullying. What true journalist finds it necessary to make a judgement call on intelligence level? Being articulate and intelligent are two different skills.

    Please do more research before calling someone “dumb” just because they are not great at public speaking or writing.
    Skill sets do not measure intelligence level.

  • You forgot Kellie Pickler and Anna Nicole Smith!

  • Kai

    Not like I disagree with this, because it’s probably true, but apparently the author of this didn’t exactly use correct grammar, or show her brightest skills either. When talking about Draya, she said, “When she’s not yapping at women she thinks may be after her man, she’s making dumb decisions that will effect her career…”, she should have been saying AFFECT, not EFFECT. As well as adding a few more words into the sentence so it doesn’t sound so unprofessional. Shoot, if you’re going to talk about someone’s intelligence, at least be correct when you do it.

  • Yeah, vote for Romney, that would be stupid since he would raise taxes on everyone including the middle class. Oh, wait a minute, my bad. That would be Obama. Looks like the pot calling the kettle black Miss Butler. Don’t worry Obama is done after this term so you can’t be stupid enough to make that mistake again.

  • Luvn_it

    were’s Rihanna luv her though

  • annie

    it’s a bit ironic to use someone with a master’s degree for this post, no? i think that may reveal the stupidity of the writers of this website more than anything. this article along with several others on this site indicates that stars are not the only ones capable of doing/saying stupid things from time to time.

  • LaVaja

    This article is poorly written and uses ignorant/meaningless examples of why someone is dumb. I’m a devout Christian, but the rant against Mormonism was ridiculous. Regardless of the statement’s validity, not everyone who follows that religion is racist. Condemning someone’s presidential choice because you don’t like the candidate’s religion is pathetic and shows a greater stupidity in the blogger than Stacey. (For the record, I’m indifferent to Stacey Dash and I voted for Obama. I just think this list is crap)

  • mizshana

    wow i just watched the interview with Beyonce and Larry King, i am sadded.

  • Hazel

    A Master’s Degree in what? How to make a d^&k stand up like a straight A student?

  • ConfusedByThis

    But they still have more financial success than the average person (me inlcuded) so how dumb are they?

  • Tammie

    Beyoncé name is missing cause we all know she cant sing, don’t have a brain but good at opening her legs on stage. Yes her name is missing

  • Kris

    i disagree with a few people on this list…everyone has their ‘blonde moments”! No big deal!

  • Gigi

    i dont agree with Tyrese being on the list. those are just typo’s, and word errors.

  • Faith

    Tyson, the only one who makes sex tapes and get popular is white women and Kim Kardashian.

  • for real now?

    I didn’t even click through the whole list because I don’t have time for that. All I’m going to say is there are different kinds of intelligence. Entertainment is just entertainment. It aint that serious.

  • ElvisWasAHero2Most

    15??? Shiiiieeetttt, I could think of 1,500 more

  • Kaori

    Add most rappers, R&B singers and any Pop singer who is extremely popular, like Justin Bieber, Britney Spears, Kreashawn and V-Nasty.

    • sabrina

      V-Nasty is SO not cute though and far from a celeb…Kreayshawn’s celeb status is questionable, but she definitely is a bimbo.

  • Meyaka

    Money equals intelligence to some people,so you might want to revise this list MN.

  • “We didn’t know Tyrese was dumb until he started Tweeting.” #cryingandlaughingatthesametime

  • I’m glad you included both men and women in this list- although the inclusion of Shaq is a bit suspect. He is just ‘aiight’. Wouldn’t be listed as ‘gorgeous’ by any means. The list seems fairly accurate otherwise. Thanks for the giggles. 😀

  • Baddvixentype

    Ahhahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!! I laughed my butt off at that
    “Our offense is like the Pythagorean Theorem: there is no answer!” statement, shaq is crazy lmao

  • TRUTH IS

    Sorry but Kimbella, Shaq and Nicki Garbage aren’t even remotely attractive. Just saying!!!

  • Alexa

    I don’t think everyone on this list is “dumb”. If Beyonce and Jessica are so dumb how is it that they’ve managed to become multi-millionaires and great business women? Everyone has a brain fart, everyone’s not great at public speaking, i.e. Beyonce. No one is perfect all time.

    • realadulttalk

      They don’t run their empires–they are not great businesswomen…they have great people behind them.

      • Alexa

        I get what you and Truth is are saying but I still think that calling these women dumb is reaching. So far the only reason people call Beyonce dumb is because she sounds like a “fifth grader”. IJS, Maybe the girl just isn’t a great public speaker. When has she actually said something dumb or stupid?

        • Alexa

          Also having a “team” backing you doesn’t necessarily mean that these celebs don’t make their OWN decisions. A lot of celebs have had great teams behind them yet a lot of them have managed to go broke or not expand at all. It’s like you’re saying Bey and Jessica Simpson have had no input into their own
          success. I don’t think that fair.

          • Alexa

            *thats

          • realadulttalk

            Perhaps they have creative input–I’d doubt they have any other say. If you have a great team behind you –you don’t go broke–that’s a bad team. I’m not saying anyone on this list is dumb (I didn’t even look at the list) b/c I don’t know any of these people–I was just responding to your question. I don’t think Bey or Jess are businesswomen. I’ve always considered them business figureheads.

            • Alexa

              I guess we’ll just agree to disagree lol

        • ky

          I feel the same way.. she’s a singer, not a nobel laureate what do they want some eloquent speaker? sheesh get over it, she speaks like most other normal people

          • Alexa

            Exactly! It’s like people want her to throw out intellectually stimulating words every time she speaks. Give me a break.

          • realadulttalk

            So it’s ok to be inarticulate if you are a singer? I’m very unclear why people get all offended when this woman is called out. She has no education! Wendy said she sounded like she had a 5th grade education–well she only has like a 9th grade one!!

            • ky

              Wendy Williams isn’t the brightest crayon in the box either. But even the most educated person can sound horrible if public speaking isn’t their strong suit. And about the education that isn’t even proven,most singers start very young and don’t have formal education, just don’t support them if you don’t like it.

              • realadulttalk

                Wendy Williams has a college degree…let’s go back to those w/out hs diploma’s. Sorry, but many celebrities go and get that paper (most do have diplomas even if they were home-schooled) to not bother with the most basic of education is sad to me. When the world sees (from your speaking and writing) that you are not educated is very sad. I don’t support her-I don’t support any artists unless you count my rhapsody account. But the like/dislike thing has no bearing on one’s education.

                • So being formally educated means that you’re a great speaker, really? also having a degree doesn’t mean you’re intelligent, just book smart I am sorry education has nothing to do with intelligence, or your articulation or verbal expression.

              • Kaori

                Just because a singer starts her/his career at a young age, that is no excuse for her/him to not be able to speak in an articulate manner. The thing is – These people are more than capable of hiring someone who can help them work on their speaking skills.

            • Alexa

              Inarticulate? Well that depends on who you ask, I can understand what she says just fine. She doesn’t have a speech impediment. King George VI ( The Kings Speech) had a severe stuttering problem, is he considered “dumb” because he was obviously inarticulate.

          • Kaori

            Being a singer doesn’t make one exempt from being able to properly articulate themselves. And if anything, with her being a public figure, it is even more important for her to be well spoken.

            • not necessarily, she’s an entertainer, not a politician we don’t need her to be well spoken. Not matter how much training someone has, sometimes they just can’t articulate themselves properly.

    • TRUTH IS

      $$$ does not equates smarts. They are millionaires because of their team and its easy since they foot is in the door. The rich gets richer. Not the smart ones get richer!!

    • AnnelliDAREAL

      AGREED! Beyonce has no business on that list, it’s just another way to throw shade her way. AND I’m sick of black people (black women in particular) putting down other blacks.

  • IllyPhilly

    Beauty is all that matters everywhere. It’s the reason everybody does everything. You don’t have to believe it, but it’s true and will be until the world ends. SMH at how sad that is

    • beautygoesdeeper

      You are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!!! Speak the truth. There are so many talented and smart women who don’t get a second look because they don’t meet the superficial standards of “beauty” and it is very sad. Beauty is more than just your outward appearance in my opinion but not everyone feels the same.

      • IllyPhilly

        Exactly and especially if you’re a woman.

    • TRUTH IS

      Not everywhere. Am sure there are countries who place smarts over dumb bimboes!! Trust!!

      • TRUTH IS

        *spell check bimbos or bimboes?!? Is it even a word found in the dictionary lol

      • IllyPhilly

        Yes, as long as you’re a tripod.

    • Meyaka

      You better speak it.

      • Marquis de Sade

        Hell, if that’s the case, you should be a multi-billionaire! Not only are you smart, but ULTRA-FINE too.

    • Kaori

      What do you mean by beauty is the reason that everybody does everything?

      • IllyPhilly

        Bleaching skin, perms, cars, heels, makeup, whitening teeth, fake hair, nails, butt injections, nose jobs, cars, clothes, shoes, jewels, etc. People risk and have died during plastic surgery. As much as it pays to be smart, it pays a helluva lot faster to be beautiful.

        • Kaori

          Huh? I still don’t get it because beauty has nothing to do with why I do anything.

          • IllyPhilly

            So you just get right out of bed and go to work? What I mean is your looks represent yourself to the world and sadly for some jobs how you get promoted. You want to look good for your boss, friends, and strangers.

            • Kaori

              Kind of. I mean, I do brush my teeth and wash my face. And because of time constraints, I take baths at night. I also keep a natural look, so I don’t wear make-up.

              I am not at all concerned with ‘looking good’ for friends, strangers, and my ‘boss’. Honestly, when I was younger, kids heavily criticized me because of my tomboy look, so, now, as an adult, I try not to stand out. Actually, on two different occasions when I wore heels to work, my coworkers kept making comments about it and it made me uncomfortable because I do not care for that kind of attention.

            • Kaori

              Kind of. I mean, I do brush my teeth and wash my face. And because of time constraints, I take baths at night. I also keep a natural look, so I don’t wear make-up.

              I am not at all concerned with ‘looking good’ for friends, strangers, and my ‘boss’. Honestly, when I was younger, kids heavily criticized me because of my tomboy look, so, now, as an adult, I try not to stand out. Actually, on two different occasions when I wore heels to work, my coworkers kept making comments about it and it made me uncomfortable because I do not care for that kind of attention.