The Obnoxious Married Man Who Tried To Pick Me Up In Front Of His Daughter

December 7, 2012  |  

I was in my senior year of college, working registers at the local ShopRite not far from my school’s campus. I hadn’t been at the job long, maybe two weeks, but I was starting to adjust to the foreign faces that passed through the aisles in the predominantly white town and the concept of standing stationary on my feet for hours on in.

Well one day, while working my assigned shift, I experienced a situation that I’ll probably never forget. Looking cute with my hair pulled high in a wild curly bush and dressed in my regular ShopRite attire, I was busy ringing up customers when a middle-aged white man stepped into my aisle. He was an attractive man, tall in height with peppered hair and relaxed clothing. I had noticed him eyeing me before he reached the register, but didn’t pay him that much mind. Mr. Stare-me-down was accompanied by his daughter, whom, once they reached the register, he assigned to the end of the conveyor belt to do some bagging for him.

I politely greeted him and treated him just as a regular shopper until I asked for his ShopRite card. Then, s**t got real. Once he realized he didn’t have his card, I asked him if he wanted to punch in his home number, and boy, did he steal that opportunity to unveil just how big of a scumbag he was. Instead of putting in the digits himself, he wanted me to do it so I could “Remember this number and give [him] a call.”


I decided to ignore that comment and just typed in his digits so that I could ring him up and he could keep it moving.

But he was persistent, so he continued by telling me to call him, but ring three times and hang up so that he would know it was me and his wife wouldn’t have time to answer the phone when I called. Really? He couldn’t have been serious. Thinking he was joking, I laughed it off, until he said it again—with a dead-serious, poker-straight face; obnoxiously chewing his gum and looking at me like he was the best thing smoking and I should’ve appreciated him showing me interest. Then I realized, he definitely was not playing. He was really an a**hole.

As I totaled his groceries and gave him his receipt, he made sure he reaffirmed his gravity by telling me “I’ll be waiting on your call. Ring three times. That’s It.” And walking off with his hand cupped affectionately on his daughter’s shoulder like he was the coolest dad in the world. He really had some nerve.

I shared my story with a few people and they all laughed. I have to admit that it was funny, but I was totally disgusted at the same time. It’s crazy to me because he actually thought he had it like that. That he could just walk in the grocery store, hit on the little black girl, give me his number, tell me to call and I would be falling at his feet. HILARIOUS! But really my man, you’re not only married and giving out your house number to women (not the cell number, but the HOUSE number–oh, the disrespect), but you tried to scoop me while in the presence of your child? Your daughter at that. Way to go, what a huge role model you are.

I guess if his daughter grows up to have a pig for a husband, he’d feel no shame. Maybe he could give her groom a few pointers on how to handle his side chicks. Advise him to tell ‘em all to hit him up while he’s home with his daughter, but make sure they only ring three times. That’s it. ‘Cause that’s the best way to keep things on the low. And that’s just how you handle your business when you’re a married man.


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  • Lady Di

    What gets me is the married men (regardless of race) who pursue unmarried women. Same old sorry story about not getting what they want at home. My stance is this, “If you are paying all her bills, keeping a roof over her head and funding her pursuits, then trust me you are getting f*cked”,,,Not my problem. And yes I too have experienced this phenom. Kids in the basket, wedding ring on and tryna holla! Lol

    • Machelle Kwan

      Real talk.It’s the same old same old. I tell them that’s not my problem and if they are so sick of their wives, you need to begin divorce proceedings instead of trying to get a date. These dogs aren’t bringing any fleas over here.

  • Ladybug94

    Not quite sure why you mentioned race in your article unless for purposes of being a filler to the story. Black men do this, latino men do this so bringing up race didn’t really make the story more poignant.

    • She must have felt extra flattered that it was a white man who hit on her. Guarantee you if the dude was black she would never have thought it important enough to publish an article about it.

      • Cecily Michelle

        It was simply a description, his race really didn’t matter. And yes, I definitely would have still written this story because regardless of his color, the situation was one that I believe was interesting enough to be told. Thanks.

        • You made it seem like race has something to do with it:

          “That he could just walk in the grocery store, hit on the LITTLE BLACK GIRL, give me his number, tell me to call and I would be falling at his feet.”

          Why would you say “little black girl” if you weren’t alluding to him being white and him believing that he’s doing a “little black girl” a favor by being interested in her? That’s what’s implied. Had this story been about a black married dude tryna holla would you have used the phrase “little black girl”? I don’t think so. Just something to think about tis’ all. 🙂

          • Cecily Michelle

            His race didn’t play a role in my choice to share this story as you implied in your first comment, and I wasn’t insinuating that it fueled his urge to approach me, as was pointed out by Miss Ladybug94 (b/c as she said, race doesn’t matter when it comes to a cheating husband). It was, however, a factor in the event and it did influence my view of his intentions. So you’re absolutely right, I would not have made that statement if he were black, but I still would have written the story. Sorry about the confusion.

          • Machelle Kwan

            Race has everything to do with it. Some of these old white men think every black woman is just lining up to get with them. The man in the story was acting like he was doing her some favor or giving her the honor of his attention. Not all black women drop to their knees at the moment of a little attention from a whyte man. No man of any race has that kind of power over me.

  • Okay, thanks for sharing? Its not unheard of for some middle aged black dude pushing his two kids in the cart to do the “psst” “psst” lemme talk to ya for a minute!

    • Ladybug94


  • L-Boogie


  • Say What?

    He probably is a good dad, but an awful husband. I’m not quite sure why people think the two is are one in the same. However this just goes to show you that snow ninjas are just as trifflin and the regular black ones!

    • Huh

      She said he was a white man. What are you talking about?

      • Say What?

        I’m not sure what you’re confused about. I clearly said “snow ninjas”, which was play on words because he’s white,

        • bigdawgman

          I believe the scientific term is wigga. lol

          • activist1

            I like snow ninja better but that’s just me.

            • Say What?

              Ninjas are just like power rangers because they come in assorted colors. Snowy White, Broke Black, Daybreak Yellow, Petty Purple, etc!

              • sabrina

                “broke black” DEADDDDDD!!!!! LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

                you are just killin’ the game, Say What!!!!!

                • Say What?

                  I do it for the fans!

    • Cleo

      Lmao snow ninja??? Bahahaha

    • Cleo

      Lmao snow ninja??? Bahahaha

    • desi

      I don’t think a good dad would be trying to pick up another woman intuit of his daughter

      • desi


    • Machelle Kwan

      Seriously, they are one and the same. If a man doesn’t have any respect for his wife, he won’t have any for his kids. As a matter of fact, he’s a horrible dad and father at the same time because he was doing his dirt in front of his kid! He was equally disrespecting his daughter and his wife. Don’t try to excuse this scumbag’s behavior. That was just downright grimy.