A Dad’s Worst Nightmare: Wife Gives Daughter Up For Adoption Without Telling Him

104 Comments
December 4, 2012 ‐ By Jazmine Denise Rogers

Source: Dailymail.co.uk

This has got to be one of the most bizarre things to make media headlines in a long time. According to the Daily Mail,  a Texas man by the name of Terry Achane is facing what could be one of the biggest fights of his life after his estranged wife put their infant daughter up for adoption without his consent or knowledge. Now, the child’s adopted family is refusing to give her back, even after a judge has ordered them to.

The first thing that would come to the minds of many when hearing a story of this nature is how does something like this even happen? Well, it seems in 2010, Achane, 31, and his then-wife, Tira Bland, were going through a few martial problems, as most married couples do at some point or another in their relationship. Unfortunately, these problems came around the time that the couple learned they would be expecting their first child. According to Achane, Tira suggested aborting the child or putting her up for adoption because she feared that she would become a single mother; however, Terry encouraged her to keep the baby. A few months later, in February 2011, Terry had to take a job out of state, but anticipated returning to Texas as a new father.

A mere ten days after his departure, his wife gave birth prematurely and placed the newborn with an adoptive family with the assistance of the Adoptive Center of Choice. The child, whom Terry wished to name Teleah, was adopted by Jarred and Kristi Frei, a White Utah family with six children, desperately seeking to expand to seven in an effort to give their youngest child a closer sibling.

Of course when he learned of Tira’s actions, Terry was outraged and sought custody of his daughter.

“I was like, “Utah? Where is Utah?” I’d never been to Utah. She’s never been to Utah,” Achane shared with the Salt Lake City Tribune.

The Freis’ named the child Leah, but were made aware by the Adoptive Center of Choice that the child’s father was unaware of the adoption and would most likely contest it if he found out. Although, a judge has ruled that the Freis return the child to her biological father within 60 days, they are seeking an appeal claiming that they have spent a lot of money for adopting the child, around $25,000.

“This is a case of human trafficking.’Children are being bought and sold. It is one thing what [adoption agencies] have been doing with unmarried biological fathers. It is in a new area when they are trying to take a child away from a married father who wants to have his child,” Mr. Achane’s attorney told the Salt Lake City Tribune. “

Terry, who certainly does not wish to be involved in an extended legal battle, discussed how important it is that he be united with child immediately.

“If they prolong it, that is more time away from my daughter. There are precious moments I can’t get back. … It has been a year and a half now. There is no court order saying they have the right to my child. I just won the case. I want to get my daughter and raise my daughter.”

The Freis are prepared for a fight, however.

“Since that eventful day, we have, as a family, come to know that this dream was a righteous desire blessed to fruition by God, and that Leah would be that child – and yet, little did we know the challenges and trials that awaited us in finding and fighting for this little girl,” the family shared on their blog, which they have been utilizing to raise money for their court battle.

This is wrong on so many levels. I’m not sure if God would “give” them a baby at the expense of a grieving father who wants his child. Hopefully Terry will be united with his daughter soon.

What do you think of this? Are the Freis’ justified in their fight for Leah?

Jazmine Denise is a writer living in New York. Follow her on Twitter @jazminedenise

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  • http://profile.yahoo.com/ZFXJYQVBHSV2Q56GLCZ523SLVE mergatroid

    The adopting family are basing their claim to the child the child on the money they have spent. They adopted to give their yougest born a playmate. This sounds like some low-key slavery.

  • Gina

    Black women don’t just give up their children without a damn good reason!

  • Nakia

    They are kidnapping theses children in Utah.This is not the first case, there are many more father’s that this has happened to my son being one of them. Those people are crazy saying that it is gods will, no its not its your money will. They are targeting unwed mothers. If a father or even his family is willing to raise there child I don’t see why they should not have any rights.

  • Angela

    I have read many articles about this story and it is clear that the Father’s rights were violated. He is a man in the military trying to do something for our country and of all people who is working to protect our rights, his rights get violated. Even though the adoption went through because it was set on illegal premises means its null and void.

    Since they are treating this child like property, let’s apply this to an actual piece of property.

    Let’s say you and I are roommates and we purchased a television together. We sign off on the receipt that the television is half and half. One day, you come home and find that I sold the television to someone else through a vendor. The vendor thinks that it is my television and no one else has rights to it and they perform the sale get a percentage of it, I get some money from the sale and the buyers walk off with a television that for whatever reason they could not purchase at the store. But what about the roommate?

    The Bio mother of the child didn’t even get this man’s consent before she performed this “transaction”. Not only did the Bio mother assume a risk, the adoptive parents assumed the risk as well. To keep it all the way real, their lawyer probably performed a risk assessment and said that more likely than not, given the percentage of single black mothers, that it was more than likely that the father was not involved in the child’s life and to go through with the adoption. But they played themselves, not only is the man married to the woman, he is also an American soldier stationed somewhere else trying to do right by the U.S. while his rights are being violated. They did it, bonded with the child and now are hurting because the rights must be made right and now the child has to be returned.

    If I were them, during these 60 days, I would try to formulate a relationship with the father so that the child could at least visit them. Become play cousins, auntie and uncle. But instead, they want to drag him through the mud. The Frei’s need to be careful with their claims on their blog because if I was the man, I’d sue them for defamation of character. I know it’s not Iraq but if he is stationed on the East Coast, and you are in Utah, how is he supposed to show affection in person, I do not think you can just leave the base like that. Where is he supposed to send gifts if he doesn’t know where you live? How are we supposed to trust that he has not sent anything through the mother, obviously we know she’s a liar. It will be very easy to tell if the man left the wife with no money and no car.

  • Msjmw

    Give this man HIS CHILD!!!!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JAI4SRENU2A5WKRTELXXYJPDSI Kayla

    I am not supporting the adoptive parents. But giving back a child isn’t as simple as returning a sweater back to the store. Children are precious, and aren’t easy to give back. I win’t blame then if they became attached.

  • Ann

    This beautiful gorgeous child has to suffer behind this. How can the mother be that crazy to do something like that?

  • Legal eagle

    But I thought the only way you can legally put a child up for adoption without both parental consent was in the case of abandonment. This is clearly not the case here…something is legally fishy not with only the case but this story. I find it hard to believe. Are the reporting sources trustworthy.

  • http://www.facebook.com/12334you Gretel George

    WHITE PEOPLE ARE SO STUPID AND CRAZY.

    • Gigi33

      And so are black women.

  • B

    They are not justified in their fight however either he adoption agency or the child’s mother should pay them back the money they lost.

  • Gina

    She had the baby to make her husband happy, she didn’t want a child. Some of you should stop judging the mother so harshly, we don’t know what the father was like. He could’ve been abusive, a drug addict, alcoholic and so on for all the hell we know. I want the WHOLE story.

    • http://designpardeux.com Kahli

      We do know they he moved to South Carolina to take a drop as a drill instructor. I highly doubt the Army would have a drug addict and alcoholic, training members of the army. It stayed that father couldn’t find his wife, but later contacted the hospital and they told him wife went into premature labor but that they couldn’t legal dispose information on his daughter’s whereabouts. And then later he gets a call from his wife out the blue saying she gave the baby up for adoption. I believe she did this out of spite and that the family should give this man his daughter back.

      • Gina

        I don’t think she gave her baby up out of spite. Their are 3 stories here the mother, father, and adoptive parents who know more than you and I! He could’ve been abusive, (verbally or physically), cheater, gambler and so on. I want the WHOLE story not just the father’s POV.

        • http://designpardeux.com Kahli

          I should never type on my phone again because there were so many mistakes in my last post! I apologize lol. So if you are saying there are three stories why are you continuing to believe he may have been abusive and cheater without knowing as such. I’m making my statements bases on articles I’ve read. One article said that she put an old address on the form knowing that her husband no long lived there anymore. That to me sounds spiteful. The family knew he didn’t consent the agency knew he didn’t consent! If she didn’t want him to really know she wouldn’t have even called him to tell him what she did with their daughter. He wasn’t even given the chance to raise his daughter. So how is that fair withouy proof that he is unfit.

          • Gina

            I’m saying their could’ve possibly been something wrong with him to make her give her child up. Why are you continuing to believe that the father is so innocent in this without hearing the mother’s side?

            • http://designpardeux.com Kahli

              Because I don’t have any evidence in this article or any other article telling me that he abused, was an alcoholic, gambler, cheater. So until that evidence comes out I can’t make any judgments about what kind of man he is. All I can read is that he wants his daughter back. If that seems like I believe he is innocent oh well. A better question is why do you believe he is guilty? Is it that unlikely that his wife just gave up her baby without a good reason? It happens, there was a case about it a few years back but in that case the parents weren’t married. So if it comes out that he abused her then I’ll take back what I said but I don’t have that proof and neither do you. The wife has said a thing yet so until she does, this is what we have to look at.

      • pangie

        Guys, I created a facebook page called “give leah back”. Would you mind liking it and sharing it with your friends? Maybe if enough people hear about it the family will be convinced to give her back and stop this appealing nonsense.

  • SheBe

    Wait, did you all visit the blog! Wow! According to the family he left his wife pretty much destitute and has not tried to have any contact with the daughter. They have painted the story of this man being the bad guy and they have raised over $20000 of the $30000 that’s needed. This is sad on so many levels. They make no mention of the fact that they have a court order to return the child and that they knew that the child was being adopted unbeknownst to the father. What is going on in this world? Like previous posters said, Why hasn’t the family been legally charged with anything because they ignored a court order? Why isn’t the child in state custody until the father can get to the child? What won’t the family take the issue up with the agency? MN, keep us updated on this.

  • ngoziemereonye

    this is b**s**t! the family that adopted the child are wicked! they have already 6 kids and they won’t let a father have his one child! they knew what was going on about the adoption! the dumb mom, the agency and the adopted parents should face jail time while the ageny be closed down! SMH!

  • Amber

    The mom isn’t mentioned at all. What is she saying about this whole situation?

  • wow

    There’s three sides to this story, mum, dad and adoptive parents, and then there is the truth. What if the reason she gave up the child was because he used to beat her up? (not saying that was the case, but maybe she thought it was the safest option..) I don’t know and quite frankly nobody does to be honest.

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      If he’s in the military like everyone says and he is being physically
      violent, one call to his commanding officer would have him in the brig
      before the sunset. Every military wife knows this. The military don’t
      play when it comes to domestic violence.

    • Gigi33

      Why in the heck are you bringing up domestic violence without any proof? You are completely irresponsible!!! What an idiot. As you stated, you don’t know. So shut up. Geez!!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Malaika-Angel/100000835938433 Malaika Angel

    “The child, whom Terry wished to name Teleah, was adopted by Jarred and
    Kristi Frei, a White Utah family with six children, desperately seeking
    to expand to seven in an effort to give their youngest child a closer
    sibling.”

    This family is trifling, ungodly and just WRONG. The statement above doesn’t smell right to me. So, they wanted this adoptive child to be a “closer sibling” to their youngest biological child? I’m not reading, “We wanted to give a child a loving, caring, home.”

    If they really want to do the “Godly” thing, they will return that baby to her daddy.

    • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

      Their youngest child is and adopted black boy not a natural born child. God had already smite Mother Frei’s womb and with statements she has made about her right to keep this child it is no wonder (God knew what he was doing keeping this woman from having any more children). She had a fierce case of baby hunger, as do most LDS women. They are raised to have it, their self worth is tired up with the number of babies they pop out. I have personal family experience to go by here to state that. The comments she has posted on her website make it clear that she is adopting these babies for her own self interest; to fulfill a personal need, not for the child’s interest.

  • http://www.facebook.com/michellezahrte Michelle Zahrte

    give the baby back what god do you worship? one who fits your needs?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Malaika-Angel/100000835938433 Malaika Angel

    This baby girl needs to go back to her daddy. The mother had NO RIGHT to give their child away without his consent. He was away at work trying to make a living, and that snake of a woman, underhandedly did the unthinkable. It would be different if they both agree to the adoption. I can’t see how an adoption agency would not seek the approval of the father. If the mother/wife indicated that a father was a “John Doe,” then the adoption agency needs to follow up on that claim. If the couple is married, there should be a marriage license.

    Shame on the wife, the agency, and the family who is withholding this man’s child.

  • umm?

    if nothing else this shows there are black fathers out there willing to take care of their children. I pray this child is reunited with her father. There is no way they will ever love her the same as her biological father. This is wrong and the mother is evil. seems more out of spite than fear that she gave up the little girl. moreover, what is so scary about being a single mother of one child? she wouldn’t be the first.

    • Lauren

      Black fathers showing love for their offspring is RARE! The majority are running from their responsibilities!

      • The

        That’s no even factual, please supply some statistic’s to back up your personal opinion.

    • Lauren

      Black fathers showing love for their offspring is RARE! The majority are running from their responsibilities!

    • Kaori

      I disagree. One story doesn’t change the fact that there are many more Black fathers who don’t raise their children.

      It doesn’t matter if it wouldn’t be the first time a mother has to raise her child as a single parent. That has nothing to do with this woman.

      • umm?

        We can agree to disagree. of course we can’t deduce one story changes the facts for all black fathers. However, we can’t generalize either. This wouldn’t be the only story I’ve read that show caring and loving black fathers. While there are many who run from their responsibilities, this story and others show there are black fathers who care about their children’s well being and want to be apart of their lives. Addressing the single mother comment it has everything to do with this story because her excuse was pathetic. I’m sure there is more to story but to say she created such a mess because she was scared to raise the child alone, I don’t believe it. If she was so scared why wasn’t she using some form of birth control in the first place? Why does it seem you are sympathetic to the mother?

        • Kaori

          “I’m sure there is more to story but to say she created such a mess because she was scared to raise the child alone, I don’t believe it. If she was so scared why wasn’t she using some form of birth control in the first place?”

          Are you asking me specifically or in general? I don’t recall expressing those sentiments.

          I don’t know why it ‘seems’ I am sympathetic to the mother. I am not at all in favor of what she did.

  • Nik

    They need to return that baby to her natural Father! No ifs and or buts about it. I feel sorry that the adoptive family were done wrong by the birth Mother, but they have no rights to this child.

  • Bonita

    Every side of the story should be considered before passing judgement. I’m not saying that the adoptive family is right – they are going against a court order. But something seemed off about this so I read the family’s blog (the link is in the story) and it paints a completely different picture of the father. True or not, I don’t know, but it puts a different spin on this story.

    • kierah

      I can’t imagine what they would have to say. They must have disabled the blog. The mother of the child (as well as her child from a previous relationship) was taken care of (mortgage and utilities paid) while he was away. He has met the child before because the newspaper has photos.

      This case has gone on for 2 years! Two years away from your child is agony!

      • Bonita

        See my post to Tracy above. Clearly, all parties are not being completely honest here. I read that he left her with no money and no car. The image that this article portrays of him is not the same image that the family has. Outsiders like us really don’t know who to believe. But, the one thing that is consistent in all that I’ve read is that he wants his daughter. Regardless, I do hope he gets her back, I just don’t want him to turn out to be a loser.

        • http://www.facebook.com/ayanna.patton.7 Ayanna Patton

          A loser and a deadbeat does not spend two years trying to get a child. If he was those things y would he spend money on a lawyer… those adoptive parents of course will try and make him look a certain way so they can be in the judges favor… c’mon now

    • Tracy

      She should have given the child to her biological father. This was a
      very cruel self centered decision on her behalf. Rightfully his child
      just as it WAS hers. So what happens in 18 years when she made a
      decision that the both of them were suppose to make? Despite what issues they were having and how “off” the story is the man wants his child she clearly did not, the irony.

      • Bonita

        Yes, I agree. She should have given the child to him. But, according to her (and yes I realize her credibility is sketchy), he left without notice. No mention of a job or anything, and he showed no interest in the child until after he found out what she did well after the birth. Again, true or not, I don’t know. It’s really a case of “he said she said” garbage. And I ABSOLUTELY believe he should get his child back. I would just hate to find out that this child ended up with a deadbeat dad. But, as her biological father he has a right to the opportunity to show that he is not. My original point was only that there is another side.

        • http://designpardeux.com Kahli

          Their is another article available that says he left to accept a job as a drill instructor in South Carolina and he thought she would join him with her other child and his daughter later. But she went and had the baby in Utah and put it up for adoption.

      • Bonita

        Yes, I agree. She should have given the child to him. But, according to her (and yes I realize her credibility is sketchy), he left without notice. No mention of a job or anything, and he showed no interest in the child until after he found out what she did well after the birth. Again, true or not, I don’t know. It’s really a case of “he said she said” garbage. And I ABSOLUTELY believe he should get his child back. I would just hate to find out that this child ended up with a deadbeat dad. But, as her biological father he has a right to the opportunity to show that he is not. My original point was only that there is another side.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=512654184 Jamallah Bergman

    *shaking my head* Honestly this is the saddest story I’ve read today…..I just don’t understand how cruel anybody could be towards a child by doing something as asinine as far as putting the baby up for adoption without letting him know and knowing he didn’t want that. Just evil and wrong. And as for the other family, they already have 6 children….plus they were told to give the child back to her father. Selfish and petty!

  • http://www.mrsday.com Erica Day

    They don’t even need to MENTION GOD, unless it’s to say the GODLY thing to do is give that baby back to her father. What in the WORLD?

  • realadulttalk

    Those people KNEW the father didn’t know about this and think they should get money back? Uh, yeah….NO!!! Give that man his child–there is a special place for people like this.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_4TC2GNVJI3KE4UNJAFZRSDT7NQ Lisa

    The adoption agency and the adoptive parents knew the situation. They both was wrong. The adoptive parents shouldn’t have adopted the child. The agency needs to to be sued and made to pay for this fathers lawyer expenses.

  • Kaori

    “I’m not sure if God would “give” them a baby at the expense of a grieving father who wants his child.”

    :That is because this has no relation to a ‘God’

    :Did the dad say really “Where is Utah”? Anyway, that is besides the point. I think the family should give back the child since the father wants to raise her and he had no part in her being put up for adoption.

  • meknows

    My husband and I are going through the same thing. These birth mothers get good money from these attorney run adoption agencies. My husband and I are using a private non-profit agency and we are headed into court for our daughter. I don’t blame the adoptive parents. The birth mother is TOTALLY at fauly for this one. These are the chances that you take when you want o adopt and it’s heartbreaking. They have had this child for almost 2 years and they have bonded with her….It’s said for everyone involved. Birth mothers need to be fully investigated they way the investigate us the adoptive parents. Some of them have become pros at hopping from agency to agency making money.

    • realadulttalk

      The story states the adoptive parents knew of the deception–they are at fault as well.

    • kierah

      I respectfully have to disagree. The adoptive parents knew that this child had a father out there and this father had not consented to adoption. Most people would have backed out of this situation. The adoptive parents helped create this situation and are perpetuating the situation because they paid x amount of $ for this adoption.

    • ladyvee

      I am a birth mother and there are always two sides to any story. I can tell you that I used a non profit private agency and they only talked to me once when I was pregnant and once at the hospital. They lied about the adopted family not being able to attend the birth saying they couldn’t make it but, after talking to the adopted mother she told me that they did not even know they had been chosen until six weeks after I gave birth but, they were telling me that they family picked the baby up the day after I left the hospital. The agency should have done their job and checked out everyone involved in this mess and although the birth mother was wrong this still falls back on the laws that should be in place to protect everyone involved in adoptions. This has lasted longer than it should because, the adoptive parents are fighting when they should have thought about the child that they are hurting and the man who had no idea what his wife was up to, Sometimes in order to prove you love something is to let it go. If they truly loved this child then they would make the transition as easy and quick as possible so it doesn’t hurt the child. I am in no way speaking on your situation because, I don’t know it. I do feel that anyone who puts their child up should be sure about doing it. I hope things work out for you and your family but, in regards to this article it seems that they agency knew, the birth mother knew, and the adoptive family knew. So now it is time to own up to it and do the right thing.

      • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

        That’s the risk you run when you trust strangers to have YOUR seed’s best interest at heart. They’re in it for the money. Why anyone would broker their flesh and blood to perfect strangers is beyond me.

        • ladyvee

          There are some people out there who have seeds and are not worthy to take care of them and keep them anyway. Some people aren’t built to be parents and some people like myself make a choice to love our children enough to give them to someone who can’t have kids. I do not regret my decision but, I wanted to point out to the poster that there are bad adoption agencies just like there are bad birth mothers and adoptive parents. My only issue with my agency was that they told small lies that were unnecessary but, at the end of the day I trusted me. I chose the parents and I chose well. he is healthy, happy, and a only child. My reason for doing what I did was simple, I was raped and couldn’t handle keeping the baby but, I dealt with the situation the best way I knew how. Not everyone is out to make money and not everyone is looking to broker there flesh and blood. There are alot of women who simply can’t see having an abortion but, can’t afford to take care of a baby. Whatever the situation might be It is hard for anyone to understand unless they have been in the situation themselves to each its own. Everyone in this situation however is wrong and they need to give that child back to the birthfather

          • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

            I respect that. And I respect your decision to choose adoption. I am sorry that that child was brought into this world under such ugly circumstances. I’m sorry but I have my own prejudices against irresponsible mothers who pop out multiple babies, who are: addicted to drugs, mom has no clue who the daddy is, knew she couldn’t afford any (or more) kids yet did nothing to prevent pregnancy etc. Or the ones who get pregnant knowing they can go to these agencies and be paid/supported by the adoptive families. Pretty much breeding themselves like a dog. I don’t mean to judge, but I do raise a good point, when you are entrusting strangers with your most precious gift you are running a risk. One I know that I would never, ever be able to take.

    • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

      So, you KNEW that the baby’s father, the mother’s husband refused to consent to the adoption of the child placed into your home for adoption? Then you deserve to have that child removed from your home.

      The adoptive family in this instance KNEW that the husband-father did NOT consent and that his consent was legally required for the adoption to proceed. Mr. Frei is an attorney himself. He KNEW the adoption would never be legal without the consent, so he KNEW they would never get to keep the baby.

      I have to believe that they hoped he would be deployed to the war zone and killed making the baby adoptable. That is the only *logical* conclusion, that they were waiting for him to simply die. They throw accusations at him that he was obliged to establish a relationship with his daughter, yet they are the very people who prevented that from happening. Further, only UNMARRIED fathers need to prove they have established a relationship. Married fathers have already proven their worth by marrying mothers.

      The new lawyer that the Freis have retained had better step carefully. In order for them to breach the sanctity of marriage to say that the baby’s father needs to prove his fitness, they might treat so far as to disrupt the basic premise of marriage in Utah, the place to raise children, and thereby open the door wide an far for homosexual marriage. If marriage alone is not sufficient to prove worthiness, as the Utah law currently states, then marriage should not be barred to gay coupes.

  • Say What?

    Damn that b!tch had like no maternal instincts at all. She basically dropped the baby and kept it pushing.

    • Amber

      Right! She clearly just wanted a man because the second they talked about separation she was thinking abortion/adoption. Single parenting is tough but it ain’t that damn tough!

      • Say What?

        I wonder if he put hands on her after this. I couldn’t blame him…

        • Kaori

          Really? You think it would be okay for him to physically assault her because of this? So, you are perfectly okay with domestic violence?

          • Say What?

            STFU! it’s not like this broad burnt the last night’s dinner she GAVE AWAY HIS DAUGHTER.

            • Kaori

              You seem to be heavily emotionally invested in this.

              • Say What?

                You seem to have something against black fathers. I peeped out your other comment below. Keep it pushing.

                • Kaori

                  That comment has nothing to do with yours. Between you telling me to ‘STFU’ because you don’t agree with my opinion, referring to the mother as a ‘broad’, and stating that you wouldn’t blame the father if he were to ‘put hands on her’, I would say that you are emotionally invested in this. I certainly didn’t expect you to address that though.

                  • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

                    Hey Kaori, Say What? has a point. If he kept his hands off of her, the man is a SAINT. And that just proves that he is absolutely FIT to raise his daughter. What this little girl’s natural *mother* (and I used that word strictly in the biological sense because she doesnt deserve to be ANYONEs mom) did was just one step removed from killing a child out of spite. Had the father never found his daughter, it would have been the exact same thing from his perspective, his baby would be, for all intents and purposes, dead. So, yeah, I can see how some commenters might be surprised if he didn’t beat the ever living day lights out of the birth mother.

                    As for being emotionally invested. This is HORRIFIC. A Lot of people can imagine themselves in this situation, or a member of their family. Babies are precious gifts from God. In this country men have a reputation for not taking care of those gifts (rightly or wrongly earned), black men all the more so. So when a black man stands up and says “No! That is MY Child and I WILL RAISE HER!” we applaud, we cheer, and we HATE those that stand in his way.

                    Yes, we are invested. We are elated to see this man stand up for what is right and we are righteously angry that some uppity family in Utah thinks they know better than her natural, GOD GIVEN, father.

                    • Hartley

                      I think ‘UPPITY’ is the word . I myself would say arrogant

          • Say Who?

            If there ever was a reason to beat somebody’s a$s, it would be this. She basically threw his child away!!! Her excuse, I didn’t want to be alone??? GTFOH

      • kierah

        She was already a single mom. I guess she didn’t want to leave the marriage with 2 kids instead of just the one.

  • kierah

    It doesn’t matter how much they spent on the child’s adoption. They need to sue the agency and get that back. The mother, the agency, and the Freis knew that this adoption was wrong because the dad didn’t know.

    Give this baby back to her daddy already! This never should have happened. The US went guns blazing to get Elian Gonzalez back to his daddy. Shoot, can’t a deputy accompany this man to the home to collect his child. They can register their appeal, but they should not be permitted to STEAL any more from this man.

    Particularly disgusting that the mother did this while her husband was serving his country. He’s a drill instructor! She wasn’t abandoned at all.

    • kadietweets

      Maybe if the mother/adoptive parent was from Cuba or some other country the US has political beef with they’d intervene .. this is sad and unfortunate. He needs his daughter, and the Freis need to sue the agency or mother .. he owes them nothing

  • Natalynn

    Don’t they have 6 other children? Why would they keep a father–who they knew wasn’t aware that his child was being adopted– away from his child? What kind of people would go through with the adoption with all that drama attached to it? How is an agency able to put a child up for adoption knowing that the HUSBAND of the women didn’t know that his baby was being put up for adoption and not reach out to him for consent? Heck, I couldn’t even get a passport for my son without his father’s permission and we’re not even married! WTF!? Somebody needs to go to jail.

  • ANTMilf

    Awwwww, what a precious baby, love that smile on her face. I pray that her father gets custody of her and it’s a damn shame the mother didn’t want that cute baby.

  • http://www.facebook.com/nikia.dshiznit Nikia D-Shiznit

    While there isn’t parity in pregnancy, there IS parity once the child is born. Why would the agency go through with this knowing the married biological father didn’t know? This is bogus. They should divorce and he should get the baby, because obviously the mother doesn’t want her. The adoptive parents should get reimbursed because the agency didn’t deliver and do it’s job.

    • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

      The agency went through with it because they get about $25K for each adoption and the offer a guarantee once the baby is placed that the family will get to keep the baby (i.e. the will defend the adoption) that is why the agency did it. Plus, in Utah, the legislature will rewrite the laws on a whim to make any adoption stick.

      Google Baby Emma Wayatt. The new attorney for the Freis had a new law written in Utah to defeat a VALID custody order issued by Virginia for a baby BORN in Virginia that was secreted to Utah for adoption without the consent of the baby’s father. That baby’s father will probably never get his daughter back despite the fact that federal law says that only the courts of the state where a baby is BORN (customarily living) are supposed to decide custody, but he does get to sue the pants off the adoption agency, the adoptive parents, and the lawyers involved, including the new lawyer representing the Freis.

  • HoneyDipp

    Wait! What??? How is this even possible? Why are these adoptive parents not jailed for kidnapping since they are defying a court order to give this child back to her father?

    • Beejcee

      Have the courts not demanded the Freis’ family adhere to the court order? The Dept of Family Services should have custody until the father can get to Utah to pick her up. Things must work a lot different in Utah than it does in most other states.

  • Trisha_B

    That is a cute baby! omg, look at that smile!!!…I feel so bad for him. He went out of state to work to make more money & the woman couldn’t even tell him she was going in labor? If he asked her not to abort the baby, what made her think he wasn’t going to be there for the baby? A lot of times we over look the man in situations like this. We think the choice should only be the woman’s & think about the man. But here is a man that wants to be in his child’s life & his ex was only thinking of herself. Reminds me of the story of the man that made a billboard on man’s rights during an abortion b/c he was hurt his ex had an abortion when he wanted the baby.

    • Trisha_B

      & another thing, since the couple was married, did the agency not ask for the husband signature to sign off for the adoption? What did the wife say to this family, agency, etc for them to exclude the husband out of all of this.

      • ignoranceisbliss

        seriously….do your research. you make me laugh…”what made her think he wasn’t going to be there for the baby?” he left his wife high and dry at seven months pregnant…that’s what. it took months and months for a single soul to even find him and even serve his adoption papers. the father and our laws are to blame here. there should be a time frame that you have to show interest in your baby before your rights are terminated…say three months. it is not like he did not know his wife was 7 months pregnant when he left her. if he wanted to be a father, he had many opportunities to be one, long before he got a lawyer.

        • The Bishop

          No you should do your research, he didn’t leave the mother high and dry. He went away because he had a job to do he was in the military. He also was in constant contact with the mother up until she disappeared on him and went to Utah to be put up by he adoptive agency in-order to give the child to these “kidnappers.”

        • kierah

          He’s in the military. She knew he was in the military. He was still paying bills at the house he THOUGHT his wife was living in. That’s not high and dry. That’s “Baby, I’m gonna out here and get this money and I’ll be back.” That’s the life a military wife.

          He couldn’t even be sure that she went through with the pregnancy. In most states, there is a time frame for exerting rights, but you have to know there is a child to begin with.

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JAI4SRENU2A5WKRTELXXYJPDSI Kayla

          If the woman wanted child support from his butt you wouldn’t be saying that..

        • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

          You are Ignorant just like your name states. He was DEPLOYED by the military to a new base. He didn’t abandon anyone. He had LOTS of proof that he continued to provide for his wife, paying the mortgage, bills, food, etc. She remained his dependent for military benefits such as insurance and access to the base in TX (i.e. the commissary and BX) and the baby’s birth was paid for by TriCare, the medical insurance provided to all military dependents. He did NOT abandon anyone.

          The baby’s mother LIED. Then the Frei’s ignored the truth and kept the baby anyway. And Mr. Frei is a licensed attorney and KNEW that hte adoption placement was ILLEGAL but they persisted anyway instead of returning the child.

          The baby’s father was WRONGED, period. The child was WRONGED, period. And these rich, WHITE, LDS MONSTERS think they are above everyone simply because they are rich, and white, and LDS

    • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

      He didn’t go out of state to make more money…he was SENT out of state by the MILITARY. I really wish the new media would get that point clear. He was active duty and he was sent to a new base in South Carolina. He did not leave Texas voluntarily. His wife REFUSED to go with him because she had an older child from a prior relationship (I imagine that the court order in that case precluded her from removing the child from TX)

  • It’sMe

    The only person for sure who SHOULDN’T have the child is the biological mother. If the father gets the daughter back, divorce that woman and don’t allow her around the child.

    • kierah

      The father and mom are currently divorced, thank God! That woman is some kind of devil.

  • Rosetta Stone

    This is MESSY! How do you give your child away without the fathers consent? thats cruel.

    • Kaori

      The child wasn’t ‘given away’. She was adopted. But it makes perfect sense how she was able to do so without the father’s consent. It happens all the time when the father is not in the picture. I think there was a lot of trickery on the wife’s part and the adoption agency not doing their due diligence.

      • http://profile.yahoo.com/VP3NW2EYYIN7JQDPRS3OCSVHLQ Sunshinegyrl

        The child was “given away”…the adoption was never finalized because once the contacted the father he objected to it. I didn’t know going away on a job assignment was considered “being out of the picture”

        • Kaori

          I didn’t see anywhere in the article where it said that the adoption hadn’t been finalized.

          I also did not say that a man going away for a job is considered as him being out of the picture.

          • Sunshinegyrl

            Ok simple put…if the attorney sent him paperwork to sign off on the adoption and he said no, then its not finalized. and I’m sorry ” It happens all the time when the father is not in the picture” exactly what does that imply?

            • Kaori

              There were no facts presented in this post that stated that the attorney sent paperwork to the estranged husband to sign. He was not even aware of the adoption, which tells me that he had not been contacted at all in the process. The article, also, does not state that the adoption had not been finalized. I don’t see how the couple could have had the daughter in their possession if it hadn’t been.

              As far as my other comment – It does not imply anything. I should have clarified that, for a lot of women who become single parents, they may give their child up for adoption because the father did not know about the baby or he walked away.

              • SheBe

                All of what Sunshinegyrl is stating is in the original article posted by the Salt Lake City Tribune. Another poster put the link somewhere on this thread.

              • SheBe

                All of what Sunshinegyrl is stating is in the original article posted by the Salt Lake City Tribune. Another poster put the link somewhere on this thread.

              • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

                The adoption was NOT finalized. It could not legally be finalized because the natural mother was MARRIED to the natural father at the time of birth. In Utah the wife’s husband MUST consent in writing to any adoption before it can be finalized.

                The court ruling that just happened, that would have been a finalization had the father not objected. But because he objected the judge HAD to rule in his favor BECAUSE he was married to the mother.

                The Freis want to make this about his abandoning the mother (which he did not do because he was deployed in the military and if that constitutes abandonment then NO ONE will voluntarily serve in the military and I suggest we start the draft with Mr. Frei) and the baby (which he couldn’t do because she was KIDNAPPED by the Freis)

        • http://twitter.com/ElsieShane Elsie Shane

          He wasn’t “on a job assignment” he was DEPLOYED by the MILITARY. He was sent to a new base in South Carolina. His wife REFUSED to leave TX because she had another child from a prior relationship. That is what makes this all that much worse, he was honorably serving his country so this rich white family could steal this little girl. And that IS what this is about. They are a WHITE, RICH, LDS family. They had adopted a little black boy already and they wanted him to have a little back sister so he wouldn’t feel alone.

          The *adoptive* father is an attorney. He KNEW the adoption was illegal within DAYS of the little girl’s birth. The Frei’s are EVIL to be doing this to Mr. Achane.

    • Stacy L

      that’s what I was thinking!!! Don’t BOTH parents need to consent to adoption?? Maybe each state has different laws or maybe the mother was being really vindictive and said the father is dead/missing or she doesn’t know who it is.. Either was this is sad. They need to do what’s best for the child and not what they want. That beautiful girl has a biological father who WANTS to be in her life and the other family is trying to fight. They have 6 kids!! Let this man be a father to his child.

      • Kaori

        I don’t think both parent’s would have to consent considering women all the time give their child up for adoption because they cannot raise a child as a single parent.

  • Jasmine

    HELL NO they’re not justified. There is a biological father who wants his daughter and it’s not like he has no right, especially considering he is married to the mother. This is cruel, and the mother should suffer some sort of penalty for doing that. Having an abortion is one thing, because it’s her body. But birthing a child who has a father who wants to raise her and then giving her away without his consent is just plain mean. I hope he reunites with his daughter soon.

    • hawkgirl

      HELLL NOO IS right! Why isn’t the biological mother not in jail? Although I wouldn’t want to give that beautiful baby back either, it’s the right thing to do! The family should adopt another child but obviously this baby has a biological parent who wants her!

    • http://www.facebook.com/jennifer.edia Jenn E. Penny

      1.The adoption agency should be put on trial, the biological mother AND father must give the child up for adoption, both parents must release their parental rights for a child to be able to be adopted, her father did not, give him his damn daughter back,
      2. these people have SIX children, and ya’ll not gonna let him have his only seed?!
      3. IF the mother recieved a check from this adoption, she should be arrested, that is human trafficking

  • IllyPhilly

    OMG! This is what kills me about how sick some people are that take it out on the kids. Damn, I can imagine what he should do, but I won’t say it.

    • JaneDoe

      Some women need to be evaluated before they have children. There are so many dead beat dads out there and for this man to actually be robbed of his opportunity to be a father is sad.. This broad was wrong on all kinds of level