You’re Worth Waiting For! Evette Holyfield On Being A 27-Year-Old Virgin

November 27, 2012  |  

From Essence

When your father is former undisputed heavyweight boxing champ Evander Holyfield, you’re gonna be one tough cookie. At 27, Evette Holyfield’s convictions are stronger than ever, and when it comes to having sex before marriage, she refuses to budge. She credits her father for giving her the bright idea at the early age of six, but her faith for helping her see it through from then on.

Now Holyfield speaks to young women about her decision to put herself (and her body!) first and to focus on her dreams rather than making a man happy. We sat down with her to ask all of the things we thought our readers might: Is it hard to do? What do your boyfriends have to say? Do other women give you a hard time about it? Holyfield was refreshingly honest and a total inspiration. Read her answers now.

ESSENCE.COM: When did you decide to be abstinent until marriage?
EVETTE HOLYFIELD: We grew up in a Christian home. When I was around six years old, my dad said to me, “You don’t need to have sex outside of marriage.” He went through the whole spiel with me. So as I grew up, I thought, okay dad, if you don’t want me to do it, I’m not gonna do it. Then I started to really understand church – the words in the Bible and what the pastor is really saying. At that point, I wasn’t just doing it because my dad said don’t, but rather, I now believe that by waiting, God will bless me and bring me a great husband. I want to meet somebody amazing, and I know that if I do this, I’m doing this for him and I. That’s what I want.

ESSENCE.COM: Has it been a difficult decision for you?
HOLYFIELD: Honestly, it’s easy for me. I was in a three-year relationship, and I never had those desires for him in that way. He never pressured me. In my mind, I already have it set that I’m not gonna do it, so if someone were to pressure me, it wouldn’t even phase me. I just don’t have those desires.

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  • Cool smile

    Was anyone shocked that her dad had that conversation with her at the tender age of 6…not sure about you but at six I was learning to read and ride my bike nor thinking about sex!!

  • I wish that I could be a virgin again hats off to Evette

  • NothingButTheTruth

    So no one else will say it? Fine then I will. She looks like a dude and that pic posted here doesn’t help. I just keep waiting for her to pull her lace front off and reveal that she’s really Evander Jr.

  • yes! i’m a virgin at 29 and not for religious reasons either. i’ve come across some fine temptations (two boys and one girl (cleo,i saw you!) in school,an american indian man that i still have daydreams about,that had a store in the local mall…woo!

  • After reading some of the comments, all I can say is that It’s so sad that we live in a world where people will find ANYTHING to criticize. Even those who make the choice to live a godly life and encourages other women to do the same, that there are people who will find something negative in it. I personally am glad when I hear something positive. Good for her.

  • Damn dont she look just like her daddy! That smirk is all evander. A 27 year old virgin has nothing to focus on in life but education, stacking paper and working out….hopefully she has taken advantage of the freedom.

  • NaturalJem

    I applaud her on her commitment to waiting and sharing this as encouragement for others!!!

  • lovedyck

    I’m not tryin to be funny but who cares

  • Meyaka

    I am happy for her and proud that she has convictions and sticking to them, may God send her a wonderful man.

  • 1Val

    She has daddy issues from having a dawg for a father.

  • Cleo

    Being a virgin is the best choice now a days, you avoid getting involved with men who aren’t the time

    • Cleo


  • JaneDoe

    Good to hear her dad instilled values in his daughters as all father should. Thats a beautiful thing. Go on girl!!

    • Kitsy

      Too bad he didn’t practice it himself (a dozen children with 6 or 7 different women!) I just love that “do as I say, not as I do” hypocrisy some parents force onto their children. Also, I wonder if he gave his boys this same “spiel”, or was he only concerned with controlling his daughters’ sexuality?

    • Wiz

      Yes, if “Do what your father tells you” is a value

  • realadulttalk

    I’m sure I’ll get some thumbs down…but if in a 3 year relationship you never had that urge…are you sure you like men??? It’s one thing to hold out–it’s an entire other thing to say you don’t even have the urge. This just sounds weird.

    • Dee

      I kinda agree. I’m a 25 yr old virgin that just ended an off and on 4 yr relationship. The urges were there but my conviction and self control was stronger. To say you never had an urge is BS. It doesn’t make you seem trashy or a sl*t if you have sexual urges, just makes you human.

      • Just saying!!

        I’m a 22 year old virgin and I also agree 100%. Either she ain’t keeping it real or she hasn’t figured out she’s playing for the other team yet! lol

    • Pivyque

      I have to agree with you. We waited until we were married, but I wanted my husband…so bad at one point lol Maybe she meant that she never had the urge to change her mind. You know, some women say they are waiting and then get to making out and all of a sudden they are half naked, second guessing that decision to wait. So, I am hoping that she just meant that she’s never had the urge to change her mind!

    • TeahMonae

      I once saw a Dateline special or something about people who considered or identified themselves as “asexual”. These people described themselves as being born with a lack of interest in sex. Some of them were in long term relationships, some weren’t. They just didnt feel any sexual urge or desire. It was very interesting. This really has nothing to do with your comment, but it made me think of the special I saw!

      • realadulttalk

        No–I actually deleted the portion where I said she sounded asexual…so you got right inside my head. Lol

    • guest510

      That was the first thing that came to mind when I read that.

    • :)

      I am the same age as she is and in a similar situation. I totally understand what she means when she said she was in a long-term relationship with no “desire”. For me, it’s like a mental block. I just know that I’m not going there, period and a lot of this “things” get started mentally before they manifest in the physical. When I am in a relationship, my sexual prowess is mentally shut off so the “desire” is not there. Then again, when I was younger, I did pray for that desire to not be there until it was time to get down with the getting down, so maybe that’s answered prayer. Hmmmm…but yes. I love men, and do have “desires” for men that I know I do not have a snowball’s chance in hell to get with ((enter Ryan Reynolds, Henry Kavill and and my chocolate eclair Michael Ealy)) …so yes. I get her.

      • Just saying!!

        I’ve had that problem. When you know you aren’t going there you create a mental block that can be hard to break down!