“You Don’t Explain Ignorance”: RHOA Episode 4 Recap

November 26, 2012  |  

Another day, another week of “Real Housewives of Atlanta” drama. Last night we saw why these ladies continue to earn paychecks as part of the Bravo series, and how when it comes down to it just about every single woman on this show has a little — or a lot — of fakeness in her. Check out the highlights of episode 4.

Kim Thinks God Has A Perfect Plan For Her

Isn’t it funny how the trashiest of people with the foulest of mouths always revert back to letting God’s name roll off their tongue when the chips are down? Kim finally moved, or was pushed out rather, of her “dream home” on last night’s episode and after she went back to her old place she talked about turning down offers from other people to buy her townhouse and what a blessing it was to have a place to live in, adding “God has a perfect plan for me.” Girl stop, Kim probably hasn’t thought about God since she had cancer — but didn’t really — during the first season of the show. It’s true God does work in mysterious ways but I didn’t see too much of him while she was cussing out movers and telling them they didn’t know what the eff they were doing.

Aiden Has Another Extravagant B-day Party He Won’t Remember

Anybody remember Aiden’s first birthday party with the 12 birthday cakes that basically turned into an adult pool party? Well Phaedra tried to one-up that extravaganza last night when we saw clips of her son’s second birthday party at an aquarium. While her little prince is at least a little more coherent at 2-years-old, which is why he was scared of the water show, I sincerely hope Apollo was exaggerating when he said his wife was spending $20,000 on this b-day party. Baby parties are not an “if you got it flaunt it” type of event, that little boy did not know it was his birthday, nor will he remember that party, except maybe being scared and sleepy, ten years from now. Phaedra needs to take Dwight off the payroll and give Aiden a regular 3-year-old b-day party next year and stop playing.

Phaedra’s Booty Does Her In

Another Phaedra fail we saw last night was her booty backstabbing. I can’t remember what terms Phaedra and Nene are on but it appears Nene and Cynthia are much closer because the “New Normal” actress didn’t have a problem busting out Phaedra’s backside mishap. Apparently Phaedra accidentally dialed Nene and didn’t realize her conversation saying she didn’t give a f**k if Cynthia didn’t come to her son’s birthday party was recorded. Nene and Cynthia obviously did give a you know what and everybody have Phaedra a bit of a side-eye for her shadiness.

Cynthia Has A Confrontation Fail

This may be my bias showing, but Cynthia’s attempt at confronting Phaedra was just a smidge weak in my opinion. For one, if she spelled f-u-c-k one more time I was going to scream, but two, she totally let Phaedra off the hook when the southern bell completely turned the conversation from defending her comment and outright denying it to talking about the mosquito bite on her chest.

I can clearly see why Phaedra is an attorney because she side-stepped that situation like no other. If I was Cynthia I would have had that voicemail cued up and ready to play and definitely wouldn’t have taken “I don’t recall saying that” as an answer.

Kenya and Walter Both Know They’re Headed Toward Marriage…

Pause for laughter.

Look, anytime a guy has to meet his lady’s family it’s going to be awkward, but it’s even more awkward when the girl doesn’t realize that they are not on the same page and her family thinks they are. That’s what happened last night as Walter, who clearly has no intention of dating Kenya for more than the duration of this season of RHOA, let alone marrying her and fathering her kids, met the cast newcomer’s family. The deer in a headlights look Walter gets on his face anytime his conversations with Kenya turn to marriage and family is priceless, but what was even more hilarious last night was Kenya’s statement that they both know their relationship is headed toward the altar.

The only place Kenya is headed is the looney bin while the Martin Luther King of Towing will be off to his next pickup job.

Kenya Makes Ovulation Small Talk Over Dinner

Unfortunately the conversation between this pair gets no better when it’s just the two of them. Kenya served up a second helping of “not trying to put pressure on Walter” by reminding him ever so not subtly that she wasn’t ovulating today. Can we say that is not appropriate table talk?

The newbie went on to talk about wanting babies yesterday and hinting about the significance of 5 1/2, which is apparently the engagement size the ring Walter is not going to buy her would need to be. Kenya could adopt all eight of Octomom’s kids faster than she could get Walter to marry her. That man is only on this show to promote his towing business. I hope for women’s reputations everywhere that Kenya is just playing the part of the desperate 40-year-old single woman because there’s no way that thirst could be real.

Apparently Porsha’s Entire Storyline Will Revolve Around Kenya

So we saw Porsha for a grand total of 4 minutes and 38 seconds (or something like that) on last night’s show and all she had to talk about was Kenya and their spat at her charity event and whether she is really Miss America or Miss USA. Next week doesn’t look much better for the legitimate housewife who thinks there are 265 days in a year, which makes me wonder what she’s really going to add to the show outside of being a blonde in a black woman’s body. Porsha does have one thing going for her, though, a least the girl can cook — minus those biscuits she burned.

Kenya, On the Other Hand, is Trying To Fake Her Way into Walter’s Heart

I’ve never seen a woman go through so much trouble to fake cook in my life. I’m not saying Kenya can’t cook at all but the fact that she tried to put a meal off as a homecooked, throwing microwaved meal noodles in a pan and everything, rather than just telling Walter she didn’t have time to make meal, makes me assume this is something she does all the time and she’s trying to fake her way into his stomach and then his heart. No woman is trying to cook a meal every night, but don’t go into details about it being hard to have to boil chicken and make sure pasta is just right when all you did was punch holes in a Trader Joe’s microwaveable meal and fork it onto plates. Does she plan on fake cooking every night?

What’s even more sad is she probably could have cooked that meal buttnaked doing a handstand and Walter still wouldn’t put a ring on it.

 

The Shade Lifts On Watch What Happens Live

Kenya’s manners got a little bit better on “Watch What Happens Live” last night. The former Miss USA admitted her comments about Cynthia, you know when she said “at 45, maybe Cynthia should retire her dusty old wigs and worn out makeup brushes that are just as worn out as her welcome mat from the modeling industry” were a bit harsh. The Atlanta Housewife confessed to being out of pocket and said she even apologized to Cynthia for the remarks, maybe she’s not all bad, huh?

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  • I agree that Cynthia should have had that phone on the table and the minute Phedra denied saying I would have played it and if she would have tried to change the topic I would have brought her back around until she confessed. As far as Kim I swear I was gonna scream if I had to watch another scene of her walking around doing nothing but steady talking about how ready she was to move out of the house. Pregnant or not she could have been doing SOMETHING! Hell her kids and sweetie could have made themselves busy too!

  • Setra

    I couldn’t believe the birthday party that Phaedra put on for baby Aiden. I thought it was completely outrageous and a waste of money, especially since he’s not going to remember. I
    agree that Cynthia should have had the voicemail from Phaedra pulled up during
    the confrontation, Phaedra did kind of brush the whole thing off. I was also
    pleasantly surprised when we found that Walter was indeed not interested in
    marriage when Kenya took him to meet her family, its best that she doesn’t push the relationship further. This episode gave me and my DISH coworker plenty to talk about today
    at work. I’m glad I recorded it on my DISH Hopper, because I was able to watch
    the play back in multiple rooms, while I cleaned my house. I was able to start
    watching on my living room TV and then continued watching on my kitchen TV
    right where I left off. I can’t wait to see if Porsha’s character brings more
    to the show!

    • rai

      So is this a shameless DISH plug or nah???

      • haha! seems like a plug to me but at least they actually made a comment pertaining to the topic and not some crazy spam message. lol

  • Cakester

    Did anyone realize that in all the lying, Kenya forgot the fake salads in the house??? Also, it seemed a bit weird that Phaedra’s son’s party was at the aquarium where Kandi was supposed to have her wedding reception?? I thought it weird that nothing was mentioned about that… I need to pay less attention I guess…

  • Allie

    I personally didn’t understand what Cynthia’s intentions were with Phaedra, I think she just did that to prove that she can stand up for herself

  • Tamz

    Last night’s episode was boring, even my Gramz threw shade at how boring it was. Kenya…desperate much? You’re running behind a dude that looks like the ATL version of Bookman from Good Times…telling him your ring size, blah blah blah. Honey, I don’t think he wants to marry you, I think Kenya might have been his weekend piece or something and she got it twisted. Kim annoyed the everything out of me last night…what do you do that you require an assistant?

  • Negress

    Here’s my free advice to the lie-awyer if you go to Chuck E. Cheese for next years birthday party instead of calling Dwight maybe people will remember and stay awake. Bravo please pass Kenya some Gatorade, your girl is dehydrated.

  • You know, Kenya is a VERY un-attractive woman, in more ways than one. Her and Walter deserve each other, as he is just as un-attractive.

  • Kenya needs to get a clue. That man isn’t interested in marrying her. He’s already said that he’s done marriage and had his kids and rightfully doesn’t want to start that over again. I couldn’t stop laughing at Phaedra’s dodging azz. She got busted and didn’t woman up and apologize. Hilarious.

  • Na Na

    I really hope Walter isn’t the man Kenya said she moved from LA to Atlanta for….baby I hope you got frequent flyer miles.

    • Charla

      Dead! Lol I think Kenya is desperate for anyone’s seed right now lol

    • JaneDoe

      Right, that man has no intentions of settling down with her

  • ATLien

    ROFL @ “the Martin Luther King of Towing will be off to his next pickup job.” I am truly convinced that she is crazy because I don’t see what she sees in him or him in her…smh!

    • SheBe

      And that’s exactly why they belong together…

  • baddvixentype

    yeah that fake dinner was a mess! then she had the nerve to complain about how hard it was….smh, thats embarrassing, and she should be when he sees that scene

  • SheBe

    This episode made me glad that Kim is gone. She is so disrespectful and ridiculous! Sweetie actually seemed to be sensible last night. Kim thinks that everyone else is wrong when things don’t go her way. Lawrence said it right; she is always surprised. She needs to take responsibility for her own actions and grow some. Roy will wake up one day and realize what a messed up mistake she is. She’s a liability and like Khandi said she should’ve bowed out gracefully . Walter is the epitome of a man who has no plan of marrying that girl! Phaedra did make me laugh with her segue. I have to admit. I don’t think it was that big of a deal; the whole phone call and all that. You all are not BFFs. It’s a kids party. Not that deep. Is it me or does Khandis mom seem….. Clingy? I can’t think of the word I want and I know that’s now her only child but something seems dependent-ish.

    • nursej

      Co-sign. I read on another site that moma joyce loves to gamble, idk how true it is, but it would kinda explain why she wants to be so close. She doesn’t want khandi giving all the money to her menzs. Btw i think it wasn’t a big deal about what Phaedra said either. I dont think i wpuld giv two shids if she came either. And no, i don’t believe this man wants to marry crazy either, hell i doubt he even asked the heffA to move there…smfh

      • SheBe

        I don’t think he asked her to move there either. Something he said in the restaurant (I can’t really remember) made me feel like he was surprised that he had any influence in her move to ATL. I know other ventures led her there but her thirst is horrible! I didn’t care for how mama Joyce handled the AJ situation, but I understood. As the show has progressed it just seems like mama is just way too into her business. It was funny how the stripper offended her so much (that was Phaedras idea and he was a bit much for TV) but when Khandi launches her adult toy line ($$$$) shes all happy and participating in what the “young folks” are doing. Then to find out she “picked” out the house and thought she would move in too? Ummmm Ms. Joyce? Come on now….

  • rzakia

    I didn’t watch the show last night think I was watching the Walking Dead. Judging from this recap I didn’t miss anything. I can’t believe Cynthia thought it was a good idea to confront Phaedra about a kid’s birthday party. It’s not that important. And you would think Kim would get better workers for $10,000. Kim thinks it makes her look important by talking about money all of the time but in reality it really just makes her look more ignorant and incompetent.

  • Kells

    265 days of the yr.. Was I the only one that peeped that? Portia is an embarrasment. I am sure her family paid for that degree she has but what school did she gratuate from? That air head steez is played out dear. That damn Walter I just can’t. How old is he? Everyone else gets a big phat bish please except Nene. And yes Phaedra lying arse included

  • realadulttalk

    Cynthia IS weak–where have you been? I haven’t seen her make one power move on this show…even Kim disrespects her. I totally see why she didn’t make it to the Tyra/Naomi statuses…she’s not built for that biz.

  • JaneDoe

    Last nights episode was a snooze fest.. These women are all so petty