The Difference Between Your Guy’s Female Friend & The Chick Waiting In The Wings

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November 10, 2012 ‐ By Jazmine Denise Rogers

The term female friend is like kryptonite to girlfriends everywhere, especially for those of us who watch too many of those romantic comedies where the guy realizes that he is in love with his female best friend and the two skip off down a crowded New York City street, hand-in-hand and live happily ever after leaving the clueless and unlucky girlfriend wondering where she went wrong. As a woman who has found herself on both sides of this triangle, as both the concerned girlfriend and the completely platonic female friend, I feel that it is safe to say that there isn’t much I have not witnessed when it comes to the strain of dating a man with a close female friend. In my experience, I can say with affirmation that not all female friends are man-stealers and in the same breath say that not all female friends are on the up-and-up either. It all comes down to the woman’s motives. Sometimes her only intention is to have a great friendship with your guy. Other times, she’s merely occupying the friend role until the girlfriend role is available. And that’s only if she’s not scandalous enough to try to push up on him while he is still in a relationship with you. But how can you tell the difference? How do you separate the reals from the fakes? Peep her moves, they’ll almost always reveal her motives, and of course, his behavior will also help in determining what the deal is as well. Coping with a boyfriend’s close relationship with another woman can be difficult for some women, but before you go getting your panties in a bunch and giving all of your guy’s lady pals the side-eye, check out these signs that may indicate whether she’s just a friend or a woman on a mission.

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  • shar chillzz

    it’s all about trust but some women can hide in plain sight and those are the women I don’t like. I’m newly married and I’ve found that really sneaky women can do this well.

  • ReallyRebecca

    I’ve been scandalous. I’ve been the ‘friend’ who was having a sexual relationship with him. Nothing on that list, individually or taken together, will help you distinguish between friend or ‘faux’.

  • dbatt001

    the clicks I wasted on this article…the real answer is there is no difference. Yes im a cynic.

  • Cogito

    Everyone should be secure in their knowledge that their partners are with them of their own free will, volition and desire, but his or her having a friend inimately parked next to you relationship is like a wall street investor trading off of inside information. They are essentially doing an apprenticeship and will leverage their accrued knowledge when the opportunity present itself should they be desirious of your mate. And you will be complicit in fostering this possibility in the name of not being “concerned.”

  • Plumbline

    Don’t be gullable. Those female friends will turn out to be his next girlfriend or wife if you let them hang around………..
    ……….Galatians 5:9
    A little leaven leavens the whole lump.

  • Meyaka

    Hubby doesn’t have any female friend ,and I don’t have male friends. We don’t see use for either….

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      Thank you! Same for my hubby and I. We don’t feel the need. Of course when we first started dating I made sure he wasn’t the type of man to have women “friends” hanging around. Been there done that, wasn’t a fan of ol’ dude’s ex he called his best friend. Yeah no, someone you use to screw is not your friend they are a friendly ex, and yes there is a difference.

      • Meyaka

        Well said,the sad part is many women play into that friend b.s….