Ladies, Do You Watch Your Mouth Around The Menfolk?

October 19th, 2012 - By Veronica Wells

Source: Thinkstock,com

Thankfully, I work in a very lax, very creative environment. Pretty much anything goes. Between Maury – show watching, celebrity shade throwing (looking at you Wyclef) and impromptu jam sessions, clowning is expected on any given day. Now, let me first explain that our office is mostly comprised of women, with 2-3 men in the mix. So it can be assumed that with the spirited conversations that take place, there is some equally colorful language from the men and women alike.

Usually, it’s not an issue for either party. Or it wasn’t until a couple of days ago.

We were talking about the plausibility of certain celebrities being gay. Somewhere in the middle of the conversation my boss, who is a woman, said “…but he sucked his d!ck.” Then someone else said it and then I said it. In the span of 40 seconds, at least three women had said the word d!ck. Finally, one of my male co-workers had had enough. He interrupted the whole conversation, face all twisted up: “Language, Language!”

Oh, that was interesting. Every cuss word under the sun has been uttered in this office at one point or another; but d!ck was a non-negotiable, huh? Apparently so. I didn’t take offense, in fact I strongly believe in avoiding words that offend others. I’ll just use them in front of people who don’t mind. Plus, how many times during the work day do you need to say d!ck?

It was surprising but the more I thought about it, I’d heard another man say something to that effect. Once my sister and I were having a private conversation and my father just so happened to overhear us use the word d!ck. Naturally, he was not having it. I could understand that. For him, hearing his little girls say that word probably elicited images he was certainly uncomfortable with. After all, that word, d!ck is almost only used in a sexual/demeaning context.

So maybe my coworker doesn’t want to think about us in that context, which was interesting. In fact, the whole concept of some words just being uncouth has always interested me. Back in sixth grade, I remember cussing in front of my lockermate/friend and in true sincerity, he told me that wasn’t very ladylike and subsequently not very attractive. *Clutches pearls* Well!

In retrospect, it’s amazing that a boy at 12 or 13 was so adamant and clear about his dislikes at such a profanity-filled time of uncertainty and insecurity.

I mean, I’m fully aware of double standards, I’m just always surprised when they’re so blatantly thrust in my face.

This whole incident made me ask myself, are there any words I can’t stand to hear men say? I definitely have a couple. As much as it dominates mainstream music, I can’t stand to hear the word bicth too much in a song or from the lips of a real life man in a real life context. But I don’t know if I would have gone out of my way to correct one of my male coworkers for using it. (Not that I minded him, feeling comfortable enough to “check” us.)  I’d just resign to judge them silently.

What about you, ladies, has a man ever told you your language wasn’t very ladylike? Did you take offense to that warning or did you take his words to heart?

 

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  • chanela

    um… this question should be aimed at men! i am always shocked as hell to see men cursing up a storm in front of women,kids,and the elderly. nobody has respect anymore.SMH

  • Kayo Halana Malie

    My comment never showed up.

    I say no, I have never had a man tell me that my language isn’t ‘ladylike’. I don’t speak in an ill manner to have any woman or man tell much such a thing anyway. And if a man did tell me such a thing, I would tell him to buck off. No man is going to police my behavior.

  • Pivyque

    I don’t really curse, but there are some topics that I won’t talk about or comment on around men.

  • http://www.facebook.com/wakonda.hazel Wakonda DntgetonmyBadside Haze

    Im cutting back on my cussing period unless I get pissed. Then I dont care how it sounds or how you feel about it.

  • sabrina

    I hate hearing anyone say g-ddamn and the P word. I don’t like the D word much either. They’re such blasphemous and obscene words. I actually never say those words, and try not to cuss that much, if at all.

  • Ms_Sunshine9898

    When I’m at work I watch my mouth. When I’m with friends and in a place to be myself, I don’t have a potty mouth but I’m not gonna lie and say that some choice words don’t sail out of my mouth on a regular basis lol. . .

  • IllyPhilly

    Yup, got in trouble a lot at jobs and other places. I’m trying now.

  • http://www.beautifulmic.com/ beautiful mic

    When society wipes the media clean of all these derogatory messages towards and about women, and when street harassment gets outlawed, and when society remedies the absentee father issue, and irresponsible sex practices, then society has permission to dictate what comes out of my mouth. Fck these people.

  • Meyaka

    My dad popped me upside the head last Sunday because I was cursing like a sailor, I have been kicking it with a female who is very liberal at the mouth ,and I think I’m picking up some of her liberality lol.
    I’m going to make a better effort because I really know better, thank God I know how to control it in my professional setting.

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