It’s Not A Black Women’s Problem: Matchmaker Paul Brunson Explains Why Dating Is A Challenge For Everyone

October 12, 2012  |  

From BlackVoices

Love is patient and kind and … complicated, according to Paul Brunson, businessman turned “Modern Day Matchmaker” and now author, who aims to explain in his new book, “It’s Complicated,” why it doesn’t have to be.

For starters, one simple truth lies at the core of Brunson’s beliefs on why our conversations about dating aren’t evolving: “Establishing and maintaining a relationship is the most critical skill we can have,” Brunson told The Huffington Post. “All of the elements that lead you to having a successful romantic relationship are the same elements needed to have a successful platonic relationship,” he added.

In the African-American community, however, that truth is often convoluted by matters of race and the disproportionate number of single black women to men.

Here, Brunson explains why it’s important to check the race talk at the door, along with the biggest hangups he’s encountered in his matchmaking practice.

Read the rest at BlackVoices


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  • gmarie

    Sure dating is a challenge for everyone. I just feel like we are the only culture that DISCOURAGE our men against marriage and family life through our music, through blatant advice (“stay single” “play on playa” “keep your options open” etc etc.) Which conflicts completely with the advice we give our daughters. I’m not here to present the “who has it harder” argument but I’ll be damned if that isn’t a road block..

  • Mia

    I think dating is a challenge because so many trifling b i s h e s (of all nationalities), let these guys treat their c o o c h like a hole in a wall within minutes of meeting them. Now all women are expected to behave as such.

    • JaneDoe

      I’m going to run with your response

    • You can gouge your worth as much as you want, please don’t blame your inability to find a buyer on the other women that are clearly getting what they’re worth out there.

      • Mia

        Baby, its already purchased. Don’t get it twisted.
        This article is detailing why dating is hard these days and I was just giving my opinion. You can proudly bare your tramp stamp all you want but getting treated like shore leave does not a relationship make!

        btw, when I was 8 I was given a bit of advice I think you could benefit from. Do not use words unless you are absolutely sure of the meaning. The word is “gauge”, beloved. Unless you are planning on gouging my eyes out.