Gabourey Sidibe Talks About Her Struggle To Be Confident When The Media And The Public Obsess Over Her Weight

October 5th, 2012 - By Clarke Gail Baines

If you needed another reason to be a fan of Gabourey Sidibe, the words she spoke at a recent Women’s Inspiration and Enterprise conference in NYC last week just might give you what you’re looking for. The actress, who receives a lot of rude remarks and inquiries about her weight, touched on people’s obsession with her size, and the struggle she dealt with to feel confident about who she was as a young woman. And she also touched on how even with the confidence she gained, she still gets her feelings hurt by how cruel Hollywood and the media can be. According to fanshare.com, Sidibe had this to say about how finally loving herself actually helped her take on the role of Precious:

“I didn’t really get to grow up hearing that I was beautiful a lot, or that I was worth anything nor did I grow up seeing myself on TV. Then at some point when I was 21 or 22 I just decided that life wasn’t worth living if I wasn’t happy with myself so I just took all the steps that I could to figure out how to love myself and become confident. Truthfully speaking if I hadn’t found this person before that movie [Precious] I wouldn’t have even be in that movie.”

But it doesn’t help when magazines and sites try to make a mockery of her and her size:

“People see me as a confident person but I get shaken a lot, especially being in this business. A few weeks ago I was on vacation and I went into a CVS [a pharmacy chain of shops in the US] and as I’m paying I see a picture of myself on the cover of a magazine and they’re guesstimating what my weight is? The headline was ‘Gabourey Sidibe 250 pounds.”

But even with scenarios like that occurring constantly, Gabby tries to keep her head up in the midst of the media’s bull***, saying, “I have to keep going and living my life, so when things like that upset me I have to find things that build my confidence back up.”

I respect Gabby’s honesty, and I know it has to be a constant struggle for her with more time spent focused on her body type than on her talents these days. And while you might not agree with her size or her confidence, it would be nice if folks let her live and lead her life the way she sees fit. Clearly she’s aware of her size, and she’s decided to embrace it.

What are your thoughts on Gabby’s comments?

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Jeroldine tn

Is there a medical reason for Gabby’s obesity? I’m concerned for her health. That weight really overworks her heart. It has to pump 3 extra miles a day for every pound she weighs. That is a lot of strain on her heart.
http://www.facebook.com/OMGAMGANAPATAYENAMAH Ramon La Cruz Hart

I would like to see Gabby on the cover of Sophisticate Black Hair Care and Guide magazine!
do not like haters either

It’s rude to throw flowers in the presenter’s face. Regardless of one’s dress time at the time they show their @$$. I do not like how common sense is NOT ‘common’ amongst so many postin their ridiculousness on this site. Sheesh. And the 4 who un-”liked” you are probably spilling crumbs on themselves from the cake their fat @$$es are eatin! It’s rude to throw flowers in the presenter’s face. #WheretheOTHERCommonSenseCrewAt#
- Mia
  
  I was just trying to be nice.
  The posters here can sit and act like this person is beautiful, fierce, and charming, but she isn’t! She looks like something you have to defeat in a video game to move to the next level. Keep it real.
“We” Seem to be Obsessed too

Open Letter To Mrs. Baines: Dear Writer Lady, my thoughts (as I pick em up off the floor from where I dropped them in disgusted shock) are on your closing comment: “Clearly she’s aware of her size, and she’s decided to embrace it.” Really, Mrs. Writer Lady? Really? And just what should we all ‘Group Hug’ about? The precariously wobbly heels to her pumps in this pic? Her sky-high propensity to cardiovascular and reproductive health issues? The fact that if she needed to ‘run for her life’ (literally, like in an emergency)….she’d barely make 100 yards even? The fact that she can’t even groom herself the way many of us who purchase who purchase shaving razor (that sho’ ain’t fo’ no beard!!!!)???
I am confident we can both agree that any ‘extreme’ weight (over OR under) is not healthy. There is countless medically documented substantiation to this Fact, right? If Ms. Sidibe was notably UNDERWEIGHT; there’d be 1000′s of post from self-indignant posters….about how ‘that bony skeleton betta eat a cheeseburger befo’ she dies!’. 100 “likes” for each and every “why she so skinny?” comments.
I am very sensitive to the American Obesity Problem. Even growing up in the 80′s (when being fat wasn’t the norm, but exception); I had to exercise tactful regard when eating amongst the ‘big-boned’ crew, cuz one wrong word; and they woulda eaten ME in their rage! (lol. sorry.) I inherited my dad’s high metabolism. Even 2 kids later; can still wear the same clothing from high school if I feel like it. A lot of folks are (understandably) intimidated by me when around me. Especially when we’re eating together. Still. I ain’t ‘fat-bashing’ here. On behalf of all petite females, I wish to apologize for all of the negative stigma surrounding human beings with weight management issues. All of us don’t secretly laugh and and scorn y’all when we eat together. If you wish to consume 3 times as much as what I’D consume in one sitting; it’s your food. It’s your stomach. If it works for you, more power to ya. Po
- For Real!
  
  My thing though, is that it sucks to think that all the fat folks I know now in my 30s are gonna be the same ones raising the tax costs to pay their medicare fees for all the health-related ailments they’re bringing on themselves. Heck, we already are! I read an article that stated the funeral industry experiencing a rapidly increasing for BIGGER CASKETS for the first time ever!!!!! I DONT “Embrace” THAT! No offense to the fat folks. If I had a narcotic addiction; getting help would be the best resolution. Likewise for whomever’s addicted to food. Getting help IS the best resolution. Not justifying the self-created situation or hatin on the skinny gals!
  - This IS real
    
    I lost someone very close to me abruptly when they died of a heart attack barely into their early 30s.
Treacle234

I enjoy watchung Gabby but she needs to do the same thing Monique, Queen Latifah did and lose a few pounds. Monique was once the one to say skinny girls can’t cook and don’t enjoy food. Now she sings different tune since she lost weight and started exercising. She needs to lose some weight. She doesn’t need to become skinny but at least go in the normal weight range for her height.
- Kayo Halana Malie
  
  At her size I doubt she ever could become ‘skinny’ anyway.
http://www.facebook.com/kariene.scott Kariene Scott

I am proud that Gabby has taken a stand on the media, HOWEVER the fact is she is over weight and unhealthy and no she doesn’t need us to tell her this because she already knows. But like she said life is too short to live based upon other peoples opinions of you but, life is also to short to take advantage of your health. Speak the whole truth, honestly there are TOO MANY AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMEN that are over weight and it’s a disturbing site to see every time I walk out of my front door 4 out of 5 black women are fat or obese. We have got to do better as a race. I don’t care what you say or Gabby, NOBODY wants to be fat, obese, or over weight. #TRUTH!!!
NONEYA

the sad thing is most of her critics are BLACK PEOPLE!!
- I Insist
  
  Please Have a Seat. I don’t care if the applicable critique is comin from a tribe of blue Avatars! (lol) Being too big ain’t good fo’ yo’ health. Proven fact with countless statistics….as this is now seepin down to the LITTLE PEOPLE – whose dang parents don’t know how to feed em right and are too set in their ways to seek guidance! Does it matter what ethnicity THEY are! Please Have a Seat.
  - NONEYA
    
    “PLEASE HAVE A SEAT!! Did you just learn that on Facebook or Twitter?!!?
- Jeroldine tn
  
  What the hell does being black have to do with it???? Its true …either way. You are trying to make this racial….GAGGGGG!
rosemary davis

What Gabby needs too do is stop making excuses for herself because her weight will be a factor when it comes too the entertainment business and for those who will sit and have a pity party with her you are not helping her to say the least it’s time to stop the woe is me and do something weight loss is not easy but if you set a goal for yourself and you are determine too reach it no matter what you can be successfull without going too the extremes like some have done so my advice too Gabby is be (DETERMINE)
- AntiBullyLeague
  
  It’s not a pity party for Gabby, it’s about bullying a grown woman because she’s overweight. Maybe she has thyroid problem that makes it difficult for her to lose weight. And the entertainment biz is a bad influence on our youth that it’s okay to be stick thin and put down people who’s over size 12. Unless you’re a doctor you don’t need to tell her to lose weight.
  - AntiBSLeague
    
    Ain’t nobody heckling her by the masses everywhere she goes in public! Ain’t nobody spray-painting taunting insults on her property! If her fan site receives offensive messaging; she has the means to make sure that (actual) bully if blocked from further transmissions, even if it ends up procuring the assistance of the Authorities. No one with functioning eyeballs needs a PhD degree to be able to SEE that the shoes heels on her pumps are hanging on for dear life. That is concernable. Unless you are visually impaired and don’t know how pitiful those poor heels on `them shoes look, you should Have a Seat too. I insist!
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1554747640 Cheryl Robinson

I love her but she just looks so unhealthy. I do not think that she has to be model thin but in a country where obesity is a problem she is a public figure and needs to be the example.
- TRUTH IS
  
  Being too thin and/or too fat is a problem
Shay

I am more than sure she already understands the consequences of her weight regarding her health, however, she will in her own time. Pressuring her to lose it will only cause her to gain it back. Look at Oprah… The pressure to lose it caused her to drop all that weight, then gain it right back. Now, she is happy with herself, and living healthily. Just leave her alone and let her do it in her own time.
- Jeroldine tn
  
  NO! Oprah is not living a healthy life. She has lots of health problems due to her weight. Get you facts, before writing comments like this.
Meyaka

I like her, yes she is obese , but so is 70% of Merica, yes small waist big butt we’re fat too! If she doesn’t have a problem with her weight , neither do I.
http://twitter.com/CheezyLove1126 Chelly LvULongTime

Im glad she doesnt let it bother her as much. But to be honest, she needs to lose that weight. There’s a difference between just being overweight and being obesely big, and thats when things get super unhealthy ad medical problems arise. I would know, Im part of a family with many ppl her size
sexcgenius

The question of the day is what will this site do to no longer contribute negative comments that could affect this or any woman’s self esteem?
- realadulttalk
  
  It’s called SELF esteem for a reason.
  - sexcgenius
    
    Let’s try this again. I said, “contribute to” so this acknowledges others are not responsible for the way we view ourselves. However, others can influence how we feel about ourselves especially when you share an opinion with thousands or millions of viewers each day. I am sorry if I did not dumb down my comment enough.
    - realadulttalk
      
      I love when people try to be clever. If others are influencing how you feel about yourself–then your SELF esteem is not in tact. Someone can tell you 1000 times per day how great you are–but you won’t believe that b/c in your own mind that is not true. By the same token…some people have such large ego’s that no matter what you say to them they turn it into a positive. Perhaps I gave you too much credit on the ability to think.
    - Is the “C” for Contradiction
      
      Actually; you did a great job with the Dumb Down Your Comment Efforts! In three short (grammatically shot to $#!t) sentences even! Atta girl! You claim to be aware that the only [ONE] person responsible for how an individual feels about themSELVES…is that individual. But your next sentence (and I quote) says: “However, others can influence how we feel about ourselves especially when you share an opinion with thousands or millions of viewers each day”. As the Dummies would say; “Huh?”
  - Yes We Can
    
    Why would anyone ‘dislike’ that? C’mon ladies. It’s your responsibility to believe in YOURself enough to have SELF-Confidence; which will enable you to withstand any offensive comments….be they direct attacks or inadvertently end just having to have offended someone who mistakenly took it personally!As a woman….we’ll never be anything more or less than what we think of ourSELVES. This forum is based on a said celebrity. Not every big chick on the planet! The site would crash if we tried! I know that was pushin it. Love y’all!
get real

The industry doesn’t want her to lose weight one bit. As long as they can flaunt her around and put her on magazine covers with pretty white women (to keep those fat mammy overweight black women images out there) they will. Flaunting her around is not about showing “all shades and sizes of beauty”, its about making feel good about themselves. Trust me women putting her on magazine covers with these gorgeous white women is not a coincedence.
- You’re “Really” Right!
  
  Whoa. So true! They are So Wrong for that! Wonder why she and Tyler Perry or Spike Lee haven’t joined minds….that would be nice.
- Jeroldine tn
  
  Get real:
  That is truly a racist comment! Will the blacks EVER stop their hating on us? For what? We didn’t enslave them. But we are all still paying for it. I have many black friends whom I love dearly. They tell me that ‘yes’ they were taught as children to hate all white people. So sad.
Afro_Hello_Kitty81

I love Gaby as an actress and I find her to be classy, smart and being down-to-earth, it’s society that’s ugly. If she wants to lose weight, it should be HER decision, not by some folks telling her what to do.
- ?
  
  Is it OUR decision to have to supplement with our hard-earned money going into taxes to pay for the Medicaid they need for these ‘beautiful’ folks’ obesity-related health ailments? It seems the IRS is tellin ALL OF US that this is what WE have to do. No fair. It wasn’t MY decision for these benefit recipients to overeat! So….? Well?
  - Afro_Hello_Kitty81
    
    Gabby has more money then you and I do so she don’t need medicaid. I once was overweight thanks to getting depo birth control shot and ONLY I made the decision to loose the 80 pounds, not people on the street, not my friends and family members, MINE! No tax payer money went to my weight loss, my own hard earned money did that by going to the gym and buying healthier foods. I don’t care about what my tax money goes to, I got other things to worry about in my personal life.
    - No WONDER
      
      That you’re 30 years old (kitty81) and “don’t care about what your tax money goes to” is exactly why people like me only even communicate with people like you via the mediation of this anonymous forum. Your ignorance deems it impossible for us to ever try at a meeting of the minds in real life. That being said; at least I know why you’re carrying torch for the Obese. Thanks for sharing. If you “don’t care” where your tax-money goes; it’d DEFINITELY be a waste of time to cite any medical statistics. You’re Ignorant! Sorry for troubling you with my Knowledge.
    - Jeroldine tn
      
      Sag: Your grammar is pathetic! and YES at some point you & Gabby will need Medicare. Wise up..this forum is not about your taxes. Talk to your hero, Oblammer about that!
- Treacle234
  
  Really? Her body is telling her she needs to lose weight, society is just trying to force her to do it/ She needs to lose weight. She needs to get into her healthy weight range for her height.
  - Afro_Hello_Kitty81
    
    Oh wow, if seeing overweight people is bothering you that much then you need to get a life!
    - Try the Salad
      
      We have a life. A physically-fit one. What bothers me is seeing y’all’s air of entitlement; as if y’all ‘can’t help’ being obese. My hard-earned tax money shouldn’t have to be involved with your choice to eat to the point of obesity. Sorry if you’re feeling defensive, but the truth is the truth.
      - Treacle234
        
        Love your name lol Agreed, Afro Hello Kitty81 is too defensive.
      - kissy99
        
        @96005e593dae9158ed11800c466ada74:disqus , a lot of us pay taxes just like you do. Leave that arrogant comment at the door. If she wants to stay that size, that is her business. I wish someone would tell me I had to loose weight bc of taxes. You need to love yourself stop worring about the “thicky-thick chick” because I promise she handling her business well, probably better than yours#skinny chicks always got problem with big chick, just mad at the world bc they eat salads and chicken all day!
        
        Chile Bye
        
        Actually, with my genetically-high metabolism, I can, have, and most-definitely DO eat anything I want! You know who I am……the female you hatin on @ the buffet! The woman in her 30s who can still fit her high school clothes. I ain’t braggin; so don’t be hatin! I worry about having my hard-earned money be deducted as taxes; for Medicare to pay for obesity-related chronic health ailments. I frankly don’t give a heck WHAT your mumu size is! It’s very tragic to see a relatively young person immobilized and electric wheelchair bound —- for no other reason but complications resulting from addictive overeating.
        
        Jeroldine tn
        
        Kissy: Oops! Your totally wrong and your lack of knowledge is overwhelming. You must be obese, too. Gabby is playing a very dangerous game with her health. She IS NOT handling her problem well. Do YOU remember what happened to Chris Farley???? His heart stopped, same with John Candy.
      - trymindingyourbusiness
        
        Cleary gabby has no need for your small dollars, more than likely you need hers, what she decides to do with her life is her business.
        
        Jeroldine tn
        
        Trymindingyourbusiness:
        Yeah, and she doesn’t know her risks of diabetes (a deadly disease) up 300 % …..heart disease and many, many other health issues waiting for her. If you really cared about Gabby you WOULD be concerned!!
    - Treacle234
      
      Seeing overweight people does not bother me. I suggest you take your own advice and be less defensive about weight issues. Being overweight, obese and underweight bring multitude complications. I’m merely suggesting she gets within her healthy weight range for her height. She is young. She hould take the bull by the horn and get moving on saving her life from potential distress later on. Good health is personal decision we all make. You should keep that in mind next time you visit your doctor.
    - Jeroldine tn
      
      Sag: And YOU need to educate yourself! That was a stupid statement. We, who love Gabby, are very concerned for her health.
  - http://www.facebook.com/lisa.e.humphrey Lisa E. Humphrey
    
    Really? Who are you to force her to lose weight. I think she’s going about it the right way. She does need to love herself and the body she’s in enough to take care of herself. Maybe the media/society can help by focusing more on her contributions to the entertainment industry and less on her weight. That just might help her to move forward and focus on her health.
- http://twitter.com/Only1SeikoLaRue Seiko
  
  As a hefty young lady myself Gabby DOES need to lose that weight. I’m working on getting back to a good weight for my HEIGHT because I refuse to stay a type 2 diabetic for the rest of my life if I can do something to change it NOW. Gabby can drop the weight if she really wants to.
- Jeroldine tn
  
  Sagittarius : Don’t you care about her health?? Why not?
HONEY LOVE

I am sadden by her low self-esteem. No one should feel as though they arent worth anything. Everyone is designed to be a size 2 or even 10. But I would like to say that I would want to see her getting healthy. When I see her, she doesn’t look comfortable. Twent, thirthy punds wouldnt hurt at all. *shrug*
- Tamz
  
  I am rooting for her too!! She really needs a new stylist because they make her look so unflattering. I know how hard it is to lose weight, I weighed 400 in high school (I’m 6 feet tall also) and now I am down to 200 lbs and holding and it was not easy. But I am rooting for Gabourey, she seems like such a nice girl.
  - Citizen’s Arrest
    
    I’m about to write them a letter for even BUYING those shoes for her; let alone setting her up to be photographed at a formal event IN them! Just wrong! #CallTheFashionPolice#
- realadulttalk
  
  I agree. Thin doesn’t necessarily equal healthy. But she is a very unhealthy weight at this point and still young enough to make lifestyle changes.
- HONEY LOVE
  
  *is not*

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