Single Black Male: Do Men Really Judge Women By Their Hair?

October 5, 2012  |  

 

iStock photo

A few months back, I wrote an article about women changing hairstyles impulsively. The point in this argument was that sometimes, women want a change so bad that they will resort to drastic changes in hairstyle to appease their need for something different. Their friends may know that it’s a bad move, but will let them fall into that trap anyway. Some women have success with a completely new hairstyle, while others fail. While the post was written in 25% jest, I started to wonder whether a woman’s hair played a major factor in the courting process for men. Do men really scrutinize and judge women’s hair?

First of all, men front a lot when it comes to the importance of women’s hair. We chime in on Twitter, Facebook, and any other social media outlet with our jokes on weaves, yet we will not hesitate to holla at a woman who’s Hot with “fake hair”. Trust me when I say that I have never heard a man say “I took this woman out, and she was feeling me. We were ready to get it on, but I couldn’t go through with it, man. She had a weave! I was turned off, yo!” Yes, men have preferences, but few will let those type of superficial barriers stop them from approaching a woman, dating them, even marrying them! As men, we have much more going on in our lives to be concerned with whether a woman’s hair is in a certain style. Here are some key points that smart men have already figured out:

More Women Wear Fake Hair Than Ever

If Beyonce can rock a weave and box braids from the 90s, and still command a level of attention from men that’s off the charts, then you know that other women will attempt to wear it with no issue. It actually blew my mind when I found out that black women weren’t the only women wearing weaves and wigs! Women will do different things to their hair over time, and if it’s an official hair-do, you shouldn’t be able to tell unless you touch it. My personal issue is when you have the type of hair that gives me the urge to buy a token and wait for the 6:45 train. Raggedy hair is a complete turn-off. I wouldn’t expect to be appealing to a woman with no haircut and unkept facial hair resembling a bum, so i don’t expect women to do that either. Women are way more particular about their looks than men, so if you are going to rock a weave, rock it right!

 

If Your Hair Isn’t Complementary To You, Men May Not Find You Attractive

You would think this point is simple, but it’s completely overlooked. When men say they don’t like a particular hairstyle, what gets lost in the translation is that they don’t like that particular hairstyle on you! Women have to be real about how hair looks on them. All women aren’t built for short hair, natural hair, blonde (!!) hair, etc. Men may not come out and say that your hair doesn’t work, because that’s just doing too much. If we want to just have a physical relationship with you, then most won’t care. If they face the reality that you will be around for a long time, then the hair and other factors will be more heavily scrutinized.

Men Who Superficially React To Hair Shouldn’t Matter To You

I won’t act as if I’m naive. There are groups of men who only want a woman with long flowing natural hair. It’s one of the measures of popular beauty out there, and you can see it in all areas of life. Natural hair (afros, curls, etc) are beautiful also. I still swoon at seeing all the natural sistas that were on shows like A Different World. I wouldn’t let a weave stop me from approaching a woman, but many men won’t even give a woman a chance if they don’t fit the hair quota. You can’t get past that, so you shouldn’t try. The way I see it, those men aren’t for you, and there are plenty of men who won’t be as superficial. There’s nothing wrong with preferences, but glorifying one set of women over another because of their hair only, is disheartening. However, those men have the right to do it, and you have the right to take your womanly goodness elsewhere.

Do I like women with long hair? Yup? Do I like women with short hair? It depends on how they look with it. Do I like women with wigs? That isn’t a relative? Umm.. next question. My point is that although I do have preferences, I prefer women overall. It isn’t my place to demand what a woman does with her hair, but I won’t let it become a dealbreaker. That doesn’t mean that I enjoy women with ratty hair either. Men who let the insignificant things deter them from a chance at a woman with overall redeeming qualities means more for the smarter dudes. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t sweat it either way.

How important is a womans hair to men? Is it a deal breaker? Ladies any stories of men who passed you by because of your hair quality?

Vaughn Streetz

Twitter: @Streetztalk

Trending on MadameNoire

View Comments
Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN
blog comments powered by Disqus