Bypass The Bitter: How To Get Over Your Relationship Gracefully

September 19th, 2012 - By Kendra Koger

Open yourself up for the possibility of someone new – When you’re bitter you keep on rehashing the same relationship with the same person over and over again.  But when you begin to open yourself to the possibility that there are other relationships out there (if you choose to go that way), it miraculously works for some people.  Now, not saying that you need to rebound by jumping into something with someone to get over it; but realizing that just because one relationship didn’t last, doesn’t mean that all relationships don’t. Adopting this mindset might take you from bitter to hopeful.

(If you have children) Keep their best interest in mind – It’s not easy going from a nuclear family unit to a single parent, or a person who wants to see their children and the other person is using them as bargaining tools or a means of blackmail.  The thing is, no matter how you feel about the person that you decided to have children with, that person is still  your children’s parent, and it creates a chaotic environment for the children when one or both parents are holding on to bitter feelings toward each other.  Keep your child in mind, and the fact that the child doesn’t want to hear negative things about the other parent.  You don’t have to forgive them, but try to not be vindictive and find a way to be cordial.

Ask yourself:  What is the benefit of reliving this situation? – You’re bitter, you’re angry, you can’t discuss your feelings without sweating, but what’s the benefit to all of this?  Being bitter and reliving what happened is only causing you pain and stress, both physically and emotionally.  Do you really want to give the same person who hurt you multiple opportunities to continue doing their damage even after they’re out of your life?  There’s no benefit to it at all, so try to bypass it.

Kendra Koger has been successfully been bypassing bitterness and bypassing hitting pedestrians with her car!  Hit her up on twitter @kkoger

 

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  • cynthia

    My name is cynthia and my ex-boyfriend dumped me 8 months ago after I caught him of having an affair with someone else and insulting him. I want him back in my life but he refuse to have any contact with me. I was so confuse and don’t know what to do, so I visited the INTERNET for help and I saw a testimony on how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so I contact the spell caster and explain my problems to him….. he cast a spell for me and assure me of 3 days that my ex will return to me and to my greatest surprise the third day my peter came knocking on my door and beg for forgiveness. I am so happy that my love is back again and not only that, we are about to get married. Once again thank you Moko spell caster, you are truly talented and gifted contact his email: mokospellcaster@gmail.com

  • Pretty1908

    thank you…i have been emotional mess since my ex, whom i was best friends with decided to back off and be friends….but this just gave me so much hope.

  • Pingback: How to Get Over a Past Relationship « Veronica's Place

  • Just Peachy!

    This hit home. That fine line of trying to deal with the emotions without letting it eat at you. You try not to think about any of it but you should allow yourself to grieve and express your emotions. Doing that while not staying stuck in the past blaming yourself, that’s the balance that I juggle with sometimes.

  • L-Boogie

    Stay single.

    • L-Boogie

      Madame Noire, I have been noticing that my time starts with four minutes. May you please fix that? Thank you.

      • L-Boogie

        Plus, I am not a parent. May you please fix that as well.

  • MsRedBone

    Its hard to get over being hurt and sometimes you don’t even realize how bitter you truly are. But when you’re nursing a wound thats years old….you need to pick yourself up and move on!

  • DeepThinker

    I really like the part about not reliving it. I used to do that and it made me angry every time. It was hard to move on and one of my friends called me on how much time had elapsed since the situation went down, but I was acting as if it had just happened. Once I stopped doing that I was not only able to get over what happened but forgive him and free myself from hard feelings and actually wish him well. It is such a good feeling to let go emotionally.

  • DeepThinker

    I really like the part about not reliving it. I used to do that and it made me angry every time. It was hard to move on and one of my friends called me on how much time had elapsed since the situation went down, but I was acting as if it had just happened. Once I stopped doing that I was not only able to get over what happened but forgive him and free myself from hard feelings and actually wish him well. It is such a good feeling to let go emotionally.

  • Cheri

    I needed this today!!

  • NicPal

    Excellent article:)