You swore to yourself that last time, would be the last time.
He’s no good for you. You’re no good for him. Being intimate only leads to confusion and unhealthy feelings. So why, once again, are you in his arms?
Moving on from the ex can be difficult. It’s either friendship or physical attraction that keeps couples coming back to each other: with friendship, you don’t want to loose a confidant. With sexual attraction, the intimacy of knowing each other physically is drawing. Aside from large issues, we sometimes question why we broke up in the first place.
Granted, reasons for breaking up can be mended by growth and time but in many cases what’s in the past should stay there. Very rarely do “friends-with-benefits” work, because at least one person involved still believes there’s a future for the relationship.
Author of Can Your Relationship Be Saved, Dr. Michael Broder Ph.D. thinks there needs to be some real soul searching before running back to the ex. “Be honest with yourself: If the idea of going to another party alone makes you cringe, you’re more likely craving a quick fix for loneliness, not your ex.”
So, how do you resist? The first step would be to avoid contact. If you have mutual friends, try meeting new people not affiliated with the ex. Second, get rid of any mementos that have sentimental value. That’s right… you may have to give the jewelry away! Third and most importantly, create a virtual divide. You don’t have to completely delete him as a friend, but don’t Facebook stalk or religiously watch his Twitter updates.
Letting a man go is almost like a detox process, but once he’s out of your system, the moving on becomes a lot easier.