The Boo vs The Besties: 8 Mistakes Women Make Balancing Friends and Boyfriends

August 22nd, 2012 - By Esi Mensah
Friends and boyfriends

Source: knowledgering.com

It happens time and time again, your friend doesn’t get along with your boyfriend or suddenly so many of your friends disappear when you get a new boyfriend. Yes, relationships can sometimes destroy or end some of your greatest friendships. But whose fault is it? The girl with the new man or the reactions of her friends when she gets the man? It can easily be a combination of both. Let’s have a look at some mistakes that women make when dealing with the new man in their life, whether it’s your man or the friend’s man. Here’s how relationships can destroy friendships:

Tags:

, , , , , , ,
More from StyleBlazer
More from MommyNoire

Comment Disclaimer

Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN

  • Nana

    This is great; sound yet simplistic advice. When I started to read this, I was worried it’d be yet another one-sided rant. To my pleasent surpise, both ‘sides of the fence’ were covered! Another tip (may not work for everyone, but it’s done wonders for me): Don’t make such a big deal out of having a S.O. Yes, it’s a FAB time of your life (especailly if it’s your first) but the morer emphasis you place your S.O. the more insignificant your friends are going to feel.
    About a year ago, a REALLY good friend of mine found the love of her life (thanks to yours truly). I knew things would be different, but I didn’t anticapate being replaced. It got a point where we’d make plans and she’d ‘forget’ to show up, but was always available for her S.O. At first I passed it off as jealousy (thinking ‘Look, she’s gotta a man now. Give her space!’). Sadly, absence didn’t make our friendship grow fonder, and it wasn’t until after they broke up that she called me up and demanded we get together. Just like old times!
    She’s probably still at that daggone cafe waiting on me…SMH.
    Ladies, having a SO is great. Just don’t forget about your girls, and who you were beforehand.

  • Shay30

    Who cares. I’m studying to be a physician and I only have time for real issues. Next….

    • BW1615

      wow…after your bachelors you are 22 after med school you are 26 after residency you are at least 29 (longer if you specialize) that leaves you 6 years till you are 35 (the point when down syndrome and other birth defects become very likely. Advice: Find “him” along the way.

  • Nique88

    omg this is my life right now. My friends hate my fiance and vice versa. Now that we’re planning our wedding my friends want to be my bridemaids and he doesnt even want them to attend the wedding. However everybody has acted crazy this past year. My bf and I have had issues. My friends and I have exchanged words. Some one them don’t even approve our relationship which makes me feel like they shouldnt be in my wedding anyway but because there is so much history i feel like they should be in it. im super confused!! I just decided to have my cousins in my wedding so no one could get mad but people are still going to be angry. smh.

    • mrscookie

      I had this very same issue ten years ago when I married my husband. I know you feel torn but, the time will come for you to make a choice. Seems like you’re there. It will only run you crazy. Men and women have problems in their relationships, and since you were younger (I’m assuming) you relied on your friends to help you with problems you’ve had in other relationships. If you continue to be friends, you’ll have to stop using them as a go-to place to dump all of the issues with you and your soon-to-be husband. This is why they have such strong opinions, because they know all of your business. Another thing is when you stop venting to them, they’ll see it as you holding back or acting funny. You’re going to loose girlfriends as a result of your marriage and I think these were ppl who weren’t your friend all along. It will be painful, but you’ll get thru it. Oh, last thing, stop telling your husband everything about your friends too. Most things that are done when we are single, men don’t wanna hear. He’ll figure birds of a feather….

      Don’t have all the details but hopefully this helped….good luck

      • cheekee baby

        This is A-one advice. Still, several of her friends don’t like him? That seems peculiar. But I definitely agree with stop airing your relationship, and your friends business all out. It invites people into your relationship and gives them the feeling as though they are entitled to tell you how to run your life.

    • cheekee baby

      I can see one friend having a problem with your fiancee but several of them? Either you are the worse chooser of friends or they have some legitimate reservations about your partner. I’m also concerned that he dislikes your friends so much he doesn’t even want them there on a day that means so much to you. I’m not liking the signs of this whole situation nor do I think it bodes well for your future. So you’re isolated all alone without any friends or support? Hmmm that’s setting the stage for abuse. Think long think hard and actually talk to your friends (one on one) to find out why they don’t like him.

    • Lola80

      Girl I’m in a similar situation. my fiance doesn’t have any hard feelings against my friends, but for some reason they think he doesnt like them. They also aren’t very supportive and don’t even seem interested. They won’t be in my bridal party because some advice I received was not to include people in your bridal party who aren’t even happy for you. I love them the same as I always have, but I’m not going to sacrifice my peace on my big day just to have them standing up there with me with grimaces on their faces. lol