He’s Still Paying Her Bills, What Should I Do?

August 14, 2012 ‐ By madamenoire

Source: hellobeautiful.com

From Hello Beautiful.com

Dear Gay Best Friend,

So, I have been with my man for 2 years. We live together and have now for over a year. It just seems lately that he is very distracted and more interested in what his ex wants or needs. He does have a 15 year old with her, but I feel he should only have contact with his ex when it comes to his child. He is still paying her car insurance and I am afraid he is doing that to hold on to whatever he can. What do I have to do to get him to finally let go? I am so confused and I am also sick of wasting my time if he can’t be fully devoted to this relationship. Please help – Hoping He Moves On

See what the Gay Best Friend has to say about this at Hello Beautiful.com.

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  • Adrina

    If he’s obligated to pay this (i.e. court ruling), shouldn’t you know this? If you don’t, then you’re not communicating with him enough. This is waay too much baggage, and you may be wasting your time.

  • RJA

    I agree with y’all, he could be obligated. This is why I don’t date men with that type of baggage, I need to come first. Especially since I don’t have that type of baggage and I could put my man first, I want reciprocity…

  • Pivyque

    His family (ex included) comes first. She is the mother of his child. His child rides around in that car, so if she can’t pay for the insurance, it is great that he is covering it. If you feel he isn’t over the relationship, why don’t you be an adult about the situation and move on?

  • redfingerpaint

    Think of it this way: He’s writing a monthly child support check except for the fact that he knows exactly where the money is going.

  • FromUR2UB

    It could be in their divorce decree that he has to pay her auto insurance. In any case, when you get involved with a man who has ex-wife and kids baggage, don’t complain about about his financial obligations. If you don’t like what he does with his money, leave him alone.

    • MLS2698

      Nope. It could be in the decree that he pays for car insurance for his daughter. But any funds to the ex-wife would be in the form of alimony, and she pays HER bills with that. People who move in together need to stop complaining about it afterwards.

      • FromUR2UB

        That’s not always true. All states don’t have alimony. Texas, is one, for example. But if a judge ruled that he had to pay her auto insurance, car note, mortgage, or whatever else he/she deemed fit, he’d have to pay it until he could go back to court to get it repealed.

        • MLS2698

          Don’t want to go to Texas. And that makes no sense because if you give a woman a flat amount, there would be no further discussion. Car insurance can vary depending on the actions of the driver, so if a person gets a speeding ticket, the amount would go up. Who wants to be at the mercy of everyone who drives under that insurance? Ol’ girl needs to bail out of that relationship.

  • Kayo

    Let me tell you all something – When it comes to money, people will do what they want with their money and no amount of making sense on why someone shouldn’t do something with their money is going to stop them.

  • MLS2698

    Playing??? Yeah, I’ll come back when you fix that.