You Gotta Chill, Boo: Signs Your Man Is Too Clingy

July 6th, 2012 - By Jazmine Denise Rogers

A relationship can be such a beautiful and fulfilling thing when it is shared between two level-headed and reasonable individuals who trust and respect one another. However, a needy and clingy person can transform the once enjoyable experience of being in a relationship into what feels like a nagging, festering sore. Dealing with a clingy partner in a relationship can be such an annoying and smothering experience and is very uncomfortable for both the “clinger” and the “clingee”. Clinginess is a trait that is commonly associated with women; however, clingy men are just as common. But, what separates neediness from affection and a healthy desire to spend time with your partner? Check out some of these tell-tale signs that you are dealing with a clingy man.

 

blake.co.za

He loses his cool anytime you miss a phone call

Okay, I believe anyone in a relationship would be a tad annoyed when their partner blatantly ignores their calls. It is very disrespectful and inconsiderate. However, if you find yourself in full blown screaming matches with your guy anytime you miss a phone call or you find yourself answering a barrage of questions such as “What were you doing?”, “Who were you with?”, “What was so important that you couldn’t answer the phone?” chances are you guy is on the clingy side.

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  • Sydney

    im dating a guy right now, and he was really cool at first, but now i think hes becomming clingy… he constantly texts and calls me, im still in high school so we see eachother every day almost all day. hes starting to get posessive of me and keeping me from other people and i dont know what to do… should i break up with him or just talk to him about it?

  • blanksie_11

    It’s funny reading these comments. I’ve seen couples spend all of their free time together and I’ve seen couples have somewhat separate lives. From my experience, if a woman really digs you, she will want to be around you a lot. If she doesn’t, she’s either not that into you or just emotionally unavailable.

  • Bella

    A friend of mine has closed her facebook page down because her boyfriend didn’t like all the guys she was talking too. I’d assume this is due to his jealousy, insecurity and neediness.

  • just me

    this was my last relationship; he would get mad if i didnt answer a call or a text, and didnt like me going out cuz he though i was goin to cheat on him with one of my fb stalkers as he called them…hell he wouldnt even like or comment on my post or pic if another guy beat him to it….every guy that approached me was consider “thirsty”….and he would ask me if i settled, why was i with him and did i love him…well long story short he broke it off with me…accused me of cheating…lol which i didnt..still smh about this one….and he is the one still playing on my phone….still smh!!!!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=536872959 Aaron T. Starks

    Y’know, you get what you wish for. Where’s the article of women whining that their man doesn’t show enough affection or act like he cares? As a man who has been accused of both I’d say to a guy that if you’re too clingy OR too distant then you aren’t with the right woman.

  • Is It 5:00 Yet?

    These type of behaviors usually result in a Lifetime Pick-A-Flick movie.

  • Mocaleenie

    A lot of these behaviors seem controlling or borderline abusive to me. When a suitor displays any of these I take them as red flags and cut things off.

  • Coco Black

    My ex had an issue with me not picking up the phone ‘Everytime’ he called….let’s not forget the times i was in the gym, in bath, in the toilet etc!! It’s was always “you’re purposely not picking up my calls!”. I felt like I had to run to my phone!! Completely irrational as I picked up the majority of his calls, when he called. He’s now my ex in case you were wondering!!! He was clingy but I can only relate to the first question!! This one had ‘other’ issues like always trying to tell people how to act, or taking the moral high ground all the time. My parting words were..”you need to CHECK YOSELF!”.

  • Shay Renee

    Madame Noire are you spying in on my relation because I swear you have just described it to a tee. Smh. I couldn’t agree more with insecurity being a factor. This type of man doesn’t know how to appreciate a good thing with a good person.

  • curiosity.killed.the.cat

    I think clinginess is a sign of insecurity and that is a huge turnoff. I actually had to just break things off with a guy bc he txtd me two days after we saw each other stating, “oh so u stopped hitting me up ?” I’m like “huh?” Its only been a day since I last seen you. I had to let that go bc that’s a major red flag that he’ll be clingy in other aspects too. No thanks !!

    • Shay Renee

      Girl preach. My dude was calling me at hours when normal people are sleeping and expected me to answer the phone. Normal, rational people realize that a phone cannot be answered if someone is sleeping and cant hear it ringing.

      • curiosity.killed.the.cat

        Lmao, yes irrational is the word.

        • Shay Renee

          I knew something wasn’t right but it just didn’t come together for me until recently. And no matter how you try, irrational people cannot be reasoned with. They lack the capacity to do so.

          • curiosity.killed.the.cat

            Exactly. I think most clingy people are always going to be that way. Its like deep rooted in their personality and it sucks bc it ruins relationships. The guy I was seeing was a nice guy but the clinginess would have killed the relationship and I don’t see him changing his ways for any girl.

            • Shay Renee

              Did yours ever drop to his knees in (feigned) apology when you called him on his bullshit and threatened to leave, and eventually left? I realized that my guy would test my limits to see how far he could nag before I snapped, and right before he knew I would go off he would start with his “please baby please I’m sorry”

              • curiosity.killed.the.cat

                Lol, I just started seeing the guy for a few weeks and he was already showing signs of clinginess so early so I broke things off with him as soon as he started texting me why I wasn’t hitting him up, even though only a day had gone by. That was enough red flag for me. But it almost sounds like the guy you was with was also controlling ?

                • Shay Renee

                  He couldn’t control anything, hardly himself because a Jamaican woman me name and me doh ramp!

  • busty

    I wish I had a clingy guy in my life!!! at least I would feel loved!!!

    • Shay Renee

      Honey, please, I implore you. You DO NOT want a clingy man. That type of man does not know what real life actual grown up love is. Clinging =/= Love, at all, whatsoever, at the same damn time, in that order.

  • ang497

    I dated an extremely clingy dude for 3 months (too long). If he sent me a text and I didn’t answer, he’s immediately calling me on the phone. If I was on the phone with him and someone called on the other line, he had to know who it was. It was constant. He did nothing but eat, sleep and breathe me. Talking bout I’d kill someone for you. This fool was crazy to the 10th degree.

  • Miss D

    I (briefly) dated a clingy dude. Called me in the morning, at night, and texted me all day in between. Told him I was going to work out one evening and he got upset because he thought I was going to work out with a guy (I wasn’t, but even if I was, so what?). Good person, but very insecure. Big turn off.

  • L-Boogie

    I was seeing a guy that would constantly do the drop-by. It was so annoying. After a while I was so tired of it I just stopped seeing him.