Are You Marriage Material? 8 Signs You May Not Make a Good Wife

June 30th, 2012 - By Brooke Dean

theglobenewspaper.blogspot.com

Some women have dreamed of being married since the age of baby dolls and pigtails, so once they begin dating, every guy becomes a potential Prince Charming. As romantic as the notion of marriage may be, most people don’t stop to think if they are actually “marriage material.” Many think that simply because you fall in love and date for a year or two, marriage is the natural next step – but it’s not for everyone. If you DO decide that marriage is in your future, make sure you’re honest with yourself about what you bring to the table. After all, you can’t attract a man who possesses the traits of a good husband if you don’t display those traits yourself (and of course the same applies to men). If you’re unsure, these signs may indicate that you may not make a good wife – and have some work to do on yourself before you walk the aisle.

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GeekMommaRants

I will never buy the “you gotta have a man” steez.

As women globally, we are to morph into what ever men think they want in a woman.

To Get Married, women must consider actions:

Act like you need to be managed
Act like life is too hard for you to be self-reliant
Act like thinking is above being a woman

To Stay Married, women must consider their responsibilities as wife’s

If the man cheats, it’s the wife’s fault, she is not taking care of her man.
We are expected to give in order that men receive.
We are to manage men’s emotional stability, their eating habits, and their physical
environment.

Lastly, this lifestyle is the very best any woman could ask for?
- jane
  
  Yep! To hell with that!!! Sisters, look for a man who has a partnership view of marriage, or just have boyfriends and never marry (and don’t bring kids into it either).
  - Bianca
    
    I have the solution to this issue. Marry out of your race.
Fuzzy Frisson

All of these pointers can easily apply to men. Fundamentally, it’s all about simple human care, regardless of gender and such virtue is amplified in importance in a marriage (and other types of relationships). Anyone lacking that vital element should really be left lonely.
KeptWoman

LOVING THE PARTY GIRL PHOTO! Does anyone else besides me recognize Gabrielle Union and Regina King in this photo giving you their “B Girl” pose. Lol! I wonder how old this picture is?

I can’t figure out who the other young lady is.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1391888201 Sháila Lorraine Hudnell

Alright ladies so if you have such a problem with marriage for the sake of ALL of us stop having babies out of wedlock.Children are meant to be raised in a two parent home.Any woman who believes in God and calls herself a christian would not detest that.Women who shun marriage don’t necessarily think marriage is bad and she doesn’t want to get married, she just knows she isn’t marriage material and she is not willing to make the adjustments to her character that WOULD make her wife material because she is too selfish.Women today are pathetic.
- Thank You
  
  I want to know why when ever the topic of relationships and marriage come up does someone always bring up christianity. NOT ALL BLACK WOMEN ARE CHRISTIAN. We do not all govern our lives based off of christian doctrine.
  - 305MovesLikeDagger
    
    ha this is so true, black people always assume that you are Christian, its freaking annoying!!!
- http://twitter.com/LuvinAllOfMe83 Tiana Rivers
  
  Children may be meant to be raised in two parent homes but would you rather get beat on cheated on and ran over in a marriage for your kids or would you rather be single and raise them alone while happy???Answer that and get back to me! Secondly, just because a woman decides to have a baby out of wedlock does not make her a bad person, it means that either she could not afford an abortion like most women have at some point, or she decided to lay in the bed she made and raise her kid…even if that means being alone…..smh
  - guesswho88
    
    i agree sis but you forgot one thing and i’m gonna let you have the floor lol. there are men who go around convincing women to have kids. i believe that is the real reason. you know the type “i’m gonna be there and we’re gonna get married”. those old tired lines. they double dog dare you to get an abortion with their child. they beg and plead and promise. that is until the child gets here and the real work starts. then they’re gone like vapor. this imo is the real situation with so many women. and if you never had a strong male figure to show you love and respect then i’m sorry you might as well walk around with a target on your head. its a vicious cycle. little boys grow up thinking having a child means having a bunch of kids and when it gets too rough move on to the next unsuspecting fool. little girls grow up thinking they’ve got to do all these things to keep a man , or just having low self-esteem period. just lost souls looking for love. this is the real reason the bc is tore up. as long as this continues we will always be the same position. insanity is doing the same sh** over and over and expecting a different result!
DUMBBEACHPLEASE

I’LL SETTLE FOR KEPT GIRLFRIEND, EXPENSIVE JUMP OFF, OR SPOILED FEMALE BFF. just saying
wepo1

The black woman does not care about marriage! If the women don’t value marriage then why should men!The black woman only wants to have babies out of wedlock, because she glorifies being an unwed single black mother! If they can’t control black men the way they want they take his seed and use it against him! Being an unwed single black mother defines the black woman’s unwillingness to change her attitude and to accept the woman’s place in a family! The black woman wants to rule her family and that attitude conflicts with having a husband!
- DUMBBEACHPLEASE
  
  DUH! NOW ARE YOU MY BALLING BOYFRIEND, THE WEALTHY DUDE WHO SECRETLY LOVES MY HOT A $$ MORE THAN HIS MAIN THING OR MY BFF WHO ADORES MY CUTE, HONEST SELF?
  - wepo1
    
    you crazy!
http://twitter.com/ALifeApprentice Life Apprentice

Have we reverted back to the 50s? O_o. Why do I feel this article is bias and sexist? This goes both ways by the way and can be said of men two. Besides, marriage is not and should not be the be all and end all of someone’s life.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Julia-Durant/500767921 Julia Durant

Get you some business and maintain yourself…or marry a man whose money is so long, you won’t have to worry about the “poorer” part of your vows. Really? But don’t be materialistic? Really? The idea of being married is too much of a corporate idea now. With shows like Bridezillas, SYTTD and Four Weddings it’s very easy to see why there are articles like this. How about let’s not get married til you have a clear picture of what you want and stop letting the media tell you what to do? Or not at all? It’s not the be all end all.
Honeybee30

I realize that in order to be a good wife. There are 2 things I need to work out to be good wife for myself that is on this article. Otherwise, I can’t see myself married again. Marriage is hard work.
305MovesLikeDagger

Marriage to me is obsolete, my parents have been married for 27 but the modern day women is not worth putting a ring on their finger, they can’t cook, can’t clean, can’t be good mothers, have had a whole football team of sausages in their taco. Seriously who wants that anymore, I get severely annoyed when my mom keep mentioning this whole wife and kids thing as if that is what I want to do with my life. Single, successful and no kids!! If a guy gets married and his wife wants to divorce he screwed!! Alimony, child support, etc. etc. Screw that lifestyle.
- DUMBBEACHPLEASE
  
  MORE SO FOR BEAUTIFUL SUCCESSFUL WOMEN, WHY WASTE YOUR LIFE ON SOMEONE WHO IS GOING THROUGH AN IDENTITY CRISIS, IN A FEW YEARS WILL BE GOING THROUGH A MIDDLE AGE CRISIS, WHO WORSHIPS MONEY THAT HE WAS NOT BORN WITH, AND WHO DIDNT EVEN HAVE A FATHER TO INSTILL FAMILY VALUES IN HIM?
- Numinex
  
  Can you cook ,clean, and raise upstanding citizens of the world? Are you a Vestal virgin? Or is this some double standard you’re hoping to impose on women? Don’t expect it from someone if you don’t expect it of yourself.
  - 305MovesLikeDagger
    
    Let’s see I don’t sleep around, I am a 22 year old college graduate, pretty well paid(didn’t major in a joke major in college), I keep in shape by hitting the gym after work every day, I can clean, lol can’t cook yet and I pretty sure I can raise an upstanding citizen. So yeah, I have standards and no I will not marry down, a woman has to bring just as much to the table if not more!!!
meL

I agree with most of.this list but #3 implies husbands are waiting for their wives at home for QT is funny. The majority of involved/married men wish their wives had more social lives so they can get off their backs lmao. maybe the married readers can weigh in…
bluekissess

My parents have been married for over 20 years that doesn’t mean I want to. The times are different. Finances do play apart in the 21st century marriages.

I don’t plan to marry. Its not to many to choose from. I’ve been told to take care of you (stable career, my money, my own car etc) before being in a relationship. I know women who have those things and are still lonely. I think a women knows when she’s ready. Her mind is clear and her heart isn’t bitter. We all might not be marriage material WE HAVE FLAWS. but hopefully those flaws will be over looked
- kameria
  
  Well said. I agree.
DramaticTyping

If the black community badger black men like they do black woman about marriage then maybe more woman might be. From the time a black woman is born she told go to school, make good grades, don’t do this don’t do that or the penalty was or YOU GONNA BE BY YOURSELF like they dangling this effing carrot in front you like you starving dog…. to the point it made a lot of y’all feel like not being married is worse than spending your life with someone who incompatible and you have no other purpose in life but to be married STAWP THE MADNESS. We have a boat load of critiques for black woman but in reality ain’t nobody raising husband it assumed a woman must be PERFECT or this is the reason you alone while you must accept a man as is and allow him to grow ….am I the only one see something wrong with this IDIOTSOLOGY……..Some black woman need to consider not getting married at all find another purpose in life or dating outside your race because some men just DON’T WANNA SETTLE DOWN SOME MEN NO LONGER SEE THE VALUE IN MARRIAGE 70 percent of black woman and black men are single the difference between the two is 1 of you is desperate the other is is just unwilling no amount of changing and manipulating is gonna make unwilling participate get married to you when he see no benefit in it. I’m getting sick of media and everyone else tying to make a quick dollar off desperate woman when the answer is really simple.
- Soso
  
  Love this so true esp this line: “a woman must be PERFECT or this is the reason you alone while you must accept a man as is and allow him to grow”
- Thank you
  
  Thank You! ALOT of people dont need to be married period ever!!Alot dont want to get married!! Im so sick of women revolving thier lives around having a man oand getting married and then have the nerve to look at another woman crazy who has REAL aspirations and goals that dont include marriage.
  - wepo1
    
    Black women need to stop having babies out of wedlock because it is destroying the black community! It goes against nature for women nature to think they can raise boys into men! Just like everyone doesn’t need marriage, everyone shouldn’t be a parent! Black women want to raise a family by the white man’s system and that unwed single mother trend is genocide to the black community
    - dddooonnnttt
      
      They aren’t getting pregnant alone, and I doubt most of them are expecting (however foolishly) that the man would not stick around for their child.
      - wepo1
        
        They easy, way to easy, why keep getting pregnant from random nuggas! They have no problem dropping babies but have a problem with marriage!
        
        http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WUGLV57QFFE6LIKX56IOOC7FNI T
        
        Bum hoe bm have no sense to protect his seed. even asians and mexicans with no money marry -to protect the kids.
        You’re just another broke bum hoe bm -go kill yourself.
    - Debater
      
      Shut that mad black man foolishness up…..I peep yall angle a long time ago its so easy to pick fights with black woman you have a crew of cowards to cheer you on …..instead of fighting against the people who really killing
      black men…. black woman did not make this system that BLACK PEOPLE are design to fail in. A naggy black woman don’t hold a candle to what WHITE AMERICA has done to you…. so kiss my azzzzz because men like you mis direct your anger toward black woman because you 2 coward to stand up against your real enemy. Its so easy to pick on Black woman everybody do it so why not join in. SELF HATING BASTUD.
      - wepo1
        
        The Black woman is the black men’s number 1 enemy because millions of black men die from dealing with her lying whoosh!
        
        The black woman also sold the black man and family out by glorifying her bad attitude and dealing with the white man’s court system and government program!
        
        jane
        
        If that’s the case then perhaps black women should leave these black males alone, right? We should all just leave you alone to do whatever you want and we seek happiness elsewhere? More and more of us are doing just that and are finding true happiness.
        
        wepo1
        
        That is a good idea, because I tell black men to stay away from women without morals(mainly black women) all the time!
        
        The reason black men date outside the race is not because of color, its because other races of women have morals, better attitudes, and they vales men more because they don’t rely on welfare and child support to be their child’s father!
        
        Black women are free to date whomever that want and that has always been the case, but reality shows no race of men want belligerent,unmoral,and loudly aggressive women!
        
        I can promise you these other race of men will not let black women create a bassterd race of children with they seed! They will cut all government programs and force programs if that happen and make unaccountable whoes be accountable!
        
        http://twitter.com/LuvinAllOfMe83 Tiana Rivers
        
        Society has mind screwed you into thinking you aint ish and you believe it!!!!!!!!! Black men do what they want to do! They fight cheat steal lie and do wrong because they want to! Kill your foolish excuse saying its the black women that drove them to it! So you basically just said that the black men has no real backbone or self esteem and are basically society’s puppets because they will let any and everything persuade them into foolishness without thinking! Brothers, thank this man for the insults!!!!!LOL
        
        wepo1
        
        Black woman just look at the 70%unwed black mother rate and then tell me who has society messed up! If Black women claim to be Christians then they already know that if they create life without a foundation they will yield children that run wild!
        
        http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WUGLV57QFFE6LIKX56IOOC7FNI T
        
        Since BW brainwashed not to swirl as the BM does then LOGIC tells you they are preg by BM.
        70% unwed father rate!!
        Don’t get it twisted!!
        
        j
        
        Thank you! For every single mother there is a singler father. If the mother (or father) is taking care of the children, then she is the HERO. The parent who neglects the child is …
        
        Sabrina
        
        and do those women have those babies by t hemselves? How about the black men taking some personal responsibility (and condoms) with themselves????
        
        Sabrina
        
        Wow…what a self-loathing jerk. A woman of any race is doing herself a favor by staying far, far away from the mysoginists like you.
        
        Veratta Pegram-Floyd
        
        If Black men are dying because they CHOOSE to involve themselves in drama over a no count Black woman then that is a decision they have made. That decision also shows that certain Black men are no count in their own right if they cannot recognize their worth and CHOOSE to get involved with a woman that does not have their best interests.
        
        It all goes back to choice and what you are willing to accept. Black men AND women are equally guilty of this.
        
        Why is it so hard for you to see that wepo?
        
        wepo1
        
        Those black men are being raised by unwed single black woman so your still placing blame on the black woman!You are in denial! These men don’t know how too be men because the black woman goes out to get pregnant out of wedlock like a whoe! She has no morals because if she did she would know that great responsibility comes with being able to create life, and to make sure your family is built on a sound structure before going out to get pregnant is the most important rule! The black women thanks she can use the American government courts to raise her black children into black men and woman!..smh!
        
        All black women need to do is stop making babies out of wedlock! the funny thing is Black women claim to be so Christians but cannot agree that having babies out of wedlock is wrong and the bible teaches of what type of children you will have when that is done!
        
        http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WUGLV57QFFE6LIKX56IOOC7FNI T
        
        Wrong.
        BM are the hoes. 70% unwed father rate! Mulitple kids!
        
        The BM is a bum hoe, violent.
        
        wepo1
        
        How silly and ignorant are you? See, the problem with black women is they want to be men! So, you lose all your morals trying to try to be like black men! White women are not trying to be like white men!
        
        Men have the double standard world round and can not be whoes! The woman is the creator of life and that is a potions that comes wilt responsibilities and morals! If all women had no morals like black women the world would crumble because the earth could not support that much life!Crime and would be through the roof because having a world filled with bassterd would be genocide! Black women don’t get it!..smh
        
        There is a reason why women get married and do things the right way, they don’t do it just for fun! The women of the world do not have the white man telling them how to be parents or giving them assistance for being unaccountable for the creation of life like black women do!
        
        http://www.facebook.com/dseilhan74 Dana Seilhan
        
        Dude, what? There are a LOT of white women on welfare. I’ve been on Medicaid and WIC before, which a lot of people call welfare. Worked at Wal-Mart down in the Deep South and I don’t remember seeing any food stamps or WIC coming through my line that was black but I remember seeing a whole lot of white ones.
        
        White women try to be like men (I assume you mean as far as trying to get jobs and make their way in the world, OH NO, WOMEN WANT TO WORK AND NOT SIT AROUND WITH THEIR HAND OUT–if we stayed at home you’d call us gold-diggers) just as much as you’re saying black women do about black men. And have you noticed there are seven billion of us in the world today? And a lot of those are starving, now.
        
        I’m not saying you’re right, but you are putting some groups of women up on a pedestal that doesn’t exist. You’re idealizing people, you’re going places that have no basis in reality, just so you can trash your own community’s women. That is sad. Why don’t you try listening to these ladies who are trying to tell you how it is, and quit being so full of yourself.
        
        wepo1
        
        Really, you just gonna twist my words like some white supremacist?
        
        I never said a thing about black women not wanting black women to work!
        
        I really don’t even understand what your rant is implying!
        
        I’m trying to build up black women so they don’t have to do what white women do because the result is not the same!
        
        White women may want to be like man but I never hear talking about how strong and independent without white men like black women do! They don’t own blogs that main purpose is to uplift themselves over their men, nor do they bash or blame them! White woman want to be equally important as their men, not excel over them just to emasculate them!
        
        Black women like you got this feminism thing all wrong! You use it to gain independents from some mysterious oppressor but the white women uses it for equality with her man! I’m just telling you the facts!
        
        Sabrina
        
        Dana’s right. I live in the Pacific Northwest which is easily 99% white and you’d be surprised at how many blue eyed bottle blonde welfare queens there are around here. Sure they get married…3, 4, 5, 6 or more times…all it makes them is a hoe with several wedding bands. lol
        
        Sabrina
        
        Then if you sleep with women who want to be men, what does that make YOU?
        
        Sabrina
        
        Yeah, yeah, and you black men need to seriously consider your own flaws. Getting women of all races pregnant while being on th down-lo sleepinig with other men! HAH!
        
        http://twitter.com/LuvinAllOfMe83 Tiana Rivers
        
        That is self hatred at its finest!!!!Noone is to blame for their actions but themselves!!! Sex has become easily accessible through ALL races, thus giving no real men anything to chase but money, women have become desensitized to bullcrap and have completely halted at standing for anything but the best! Forget the double standards they died after men started sitting on their behinds and letting women go to work and do jobs they could be doing, that madness youre talking is what high school kids do, FULLY GROWN ADULTS dont argue or fight over anything but what is right…..
        
        wepo1
        
        Your comment is complete retardedd and you don’t live on this earth if you think that! 70% unwed black single mother rate speaks fro it self!
        
        Real women know that morals start with a women because she is the one who creates life! That woman must know that her responsibility before giving life is to make sure her child has a solid foundation and family structure to maintain life! Black women get pregnant because they trust that they can depend on the white man’s American government courts and programs to help raise and father black children into adults! How silly is that!
        
        The black women tries to hard to be a man and that is her problem! She let the white call her angry, strong and independent, and no other race of woman would have worn such a horrible title as a woman!
        
        juilie see
        
        mysogynistic self-hating black man. we don’t see other girls seeking you out, mr. bad credit criminal man–as said by the white man.
        
        http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WUGLV57QFFE6LIKX56IOOC7FNI T
        
        Word! Crazy bum hoes!! Bm are bum hoes!
        
        http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WUGLV57QFFE6LIKX56IOOC7FNI T
        
        The black man is a bum hoe.
        The black man is a colorist hypocrite.
        The black man is weak and drops his kids like hot bags of trash.
        
        When was the last time you went to a wedding of a black man?
        Bums! Weak, lazy, violent bum hoes!!
        
        Wish they were the white man but to scared to be a real man!!
        
        Sabrina
        
        So if the black woman is trying so hard to be a man, then she wouldn’t be getting pregnant. Your logic doesn’t even make sense. What a hater you are.
        
        http://www.facebook.com/people/Lo-Key/100002513553299 Lo Key
        
        What the hell does “not expressed by thugs” mean? WTF?
    - Thank You
      
      Black men need to stop havin sex. PERIOD!
      - wepo1
        
        Black women need to be real women and stop being whoes! They can learn how not to be so easy from the other women of the world since they have no problem following what white woman do!!
        
        Thank you
        
        oh please…not being easy is the last thing to learn from white women…
        
        wepo1
        
        I said since you have no problem following white woman so you are shouldn’t have a problem follow the other women of the world morally!
        
        GeekMommaRants
        
        You have no issue banging them! Oh, only fattest, most unattractive snow flake you find. Oh, what about Asian women? Don’t you dare!! The Asian women will not SEE YOU!!! LOL
        
        Veratta Pegram-Floyd
        
        Takes two to tango.
        
        wepo1
        
        That is stupid dumb nugga way of thinking, because only the woman is stuck with the kids and the government only force people to pay money, not parent children! That government setup destroying the black family because black women don’t see it for what it is!
        
        Veratta Pegram-Floyd
        
        That is not a stupid way of thinking…if you are going to call women hoes, then what does that make the men who sleep with them? My point overall to you is this: women as well as men have flaws and are full of fallacies. You keep trying to blame one over the other when individuals in general are responsible for their behavior.
        
        Furthermore, if the woman is stuck with the children then that further proves there are faults on the woman’s AS WELL AS THE man’s side of the relationship.
        
        I will, however, stop trying to reason with someone who has no logic.
      - http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WUGLV57QFFE6LIKX56IOOC7FNI T
        
        Word!!
    - Bianca
      
      Your thinking is way off. White women are single mothers too. What about the single dads?
      - wepo1
        
        No, your morals are all wrong because you think because white women are doing something that makes it ok!
        
        70% of unwed single mothers are producing a heavy dropout rate and black on black crime wave! Not to mention they raise men that disrespect women and black women with no morals!
        
        Black women cannot do what white women do because white women have the double standard, and racism on their side!
    - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1188505509 Claryssa Burroughs
      
      I mean, a black woman cannot have babies out of wedlock without the man…and many times, it is a black man. How about we agree that the black community needs to work on many problems together, rather than blaming and resenting our counterparts? That is what is actually destroying the black community. Constantly hating each other and for some, our own selves. Blaming the other. Forgetting where we came from. I have been told many stories by our elders how black people use to stick together to protect each other and fight this system. But now, only thing we do half of the time is live in discord among each other. What do we need? To be oppressed and beaten down again before we decide that it is in the benefit of the black community to stand together and strong?
    - Sabrina
      
      It takes two to tango, why aren’t you addressing the black men who won’t keep their pants zipped and stay faithful to one woman?
- Yolanda Marie
  
  DramaticTyping: First of all, I don’t know why but I love your name lol. Secondly, I completely agree with everything you said and there’s nothing left for me to say.
- http://www.facebook.com/bryantcl1 Candice Bryant
  
  I completely agree but I don’t think this pressure is just for black women. I think this is for ALL women. For example, the stepford wife mentality is something associated with white women but really there isn’t a male equivalent to it. All women of any race are expected to be a certain way in order to be a “good wife.” The problem is the way society views the roles of all women. Not just black.
  - wepo1
    
    Black women are the only race of women having babies largely out of wedlock, and that is creating a race of angry women hating and self hating bassterd children!
    
    This is a government plan, because black women had more values than any woman on earth up until welfare in the 70’s!
    
    History has shown that the black family started to quickly fall apart in the 70’s! This is much like introducing something foreign in an animals ecosystem that changes the animals whole way of life which ends in extinction!
    
    We have a race of women who don’t value how they create life, nor care about how to preserve life without the white man’s courts and programs! Black women must take a step back from the image white America has given them, because this falsehood of strengthening yourselves by making every unmoral think you do into an accomplishment is weakening the black family!
    
    The church, sold-out black men, and the government are all making money by lying to you! They are using your denial, naiveness, and reproductive organs against your own family and community!
    
    Katrina was a test and it showed how weak the black community was without the help from the white man’s government! The next time this happens it will not be a test and we will see masses of blacks only dying because we cannot produce and have no structure applied to our existence!!!!
    - j
      
      That government stuff may be part of the problem. However, I think by far the cause of the low marriage rate is the fact that the gender ratio in the black community is really lopsided. There are not enough black men. In all societies and ethnicities, when women outnumber men, there is more promiscuity, single-parenting.
      - wepo1
        
        When you have one black woman with 3 baby daddies that does not help the ratio either!
    - Sabrina
      
      That is NOT true. Most of the young girls on those 16 and Pregnant type of ‘reality shows’ are white. There are women of ALL races having babies out of wedlock, not just black. We just judge black women more harshly for thing that all other races do, and that’s not fair!
- KIR12
  
  I’ve got your #. Now, you want to blame black men? Black men did not always abandon their families and kids. This woman comes from the previous groupthink feminist black women who said we don’t need a man. These women were brainwashed by white feminist and liberals into thinking they knew better than their black ancestors post slavery and even their own black mothers. Letting these white folk into their homes and beds. In the end the black woman was left on welfare and alone while the white feminist woman went home to her husband. Don’t you all see the marriage state that the black woman is in today is a SELF INFLICTED tragedy. Created by propaganda and lies. If you repeat a lie enough the ignorant and immature will start to believe it. Black women, black kids and the black community was nothing more than human guinea pigs used to test liberals theories on marriage and the nuclear family. Before these liberal, feminist knowitalls came along black women had the highest marriage rate of any group of women including white women. Fact, go check marriage rates of black women all the way up to the 1960′s. lol & smh at the same time.
  
  How’s that working out for you black women? In spite of abject poverty, racism, segregation, discrimination and Jim Crow laws the black community was productive, functional and extremly stable. Almost every black child had a BLACK FATHER in the home and the overwhelming majority of black women were married. Today 31 percent of African American women by their early forties have never married as compared to only 9 percent of White, 11 percent of Asian , and 12 percent of Latino women in the same age group. Black illegitimacy went from 24% to 72% (85%+ in the very worst ghettos), 50% abortions of all black pregnancies, overcrowding of abandoned/abused black kids in CPS, blacks kids have 50% H.S. dropout rates and 15 to 20% unemployment (46% for teens), only 7% of businesses are black, crime is out of control and black families are now 3rd and 4th generational welfare recipients with generation poverty. 70% of the men of all races in prison come from single parent homes……70%! In spite clear documented facts that women (of any race), AS A GROUP, can’t raise boys we’ve got dingbats like this woman saying marriage is not essential part of a productive community. Yet, after 4 generations they can’t name one black community with a high illegitimacy rate that is productive and educating black kids in this country. Not one.
  - DramaticTyping
    
    All those numbers are FALSE but you get a E for effort on making it look valid … The real issue behind men like you is you are manipulative cowards men like you don’t want woman to have options therefore if she in a desperation state you do not have to put forth any effort that leave the burden all on the woman to be 100 percent for a 20 percent man…. while men like you act like dictators instead of a husbands and friends but that concept is foreign to a man who are chauvinist with identity issues and get their rocks off on dominating and belittling woman. I never said marriage is obsolete or not necessary but its not for everyone and it should not CONSUME anyone life to the point they feel desperate because they not married. The tactics being used to manipulate black woman is gone to far……. I feel like men like you use this as manipulation tactics to not look at yourself. Its possible you may also not be worthy of a relationship. Just because Black Woman outnumber Black Men that does not automatically make Black Men Blameless or in the right. Stop Smoke screening me with Ghetto Black Woman argument that is not a trump card to win and argument. This further proves your IDIOTSOLGY is based on Racism and Hatred not Truth.
    - KIR12
      
      Care to be specific about what’s false? See, that difference between between me and you wannabe(white feminist do not look at you as an equal) black feminist. Any info I’ve posted is all over the net by respected reputable sources. I can’t post links. Goggle “40 years of lies the black family”.
    - guesswho88
      
      2000 stars if i could dramatic typing. get them in line girl!
  - Bianca
    
    Where are you getting these numbers from?
    - KIR12
      
      It won’t let me post links Google black marriage pre 1960′s/50′s. There is literature from respected sources all over the internet. You can start by Google “40 years of lies the black family”.
- KIR12
  
  You’re also overly dramatic. Black women don’t co-sign this nutcase (ie eccentric, crazy) woman. lol I read her comment before looking at the 7 signs and thought these signs were going to be outrageous and overly demanding. Not! Woman, what exactly are you willing to do?
- Bianca
  
  Just want to comment on the dating out of your race. I actually started dating a white man about a month and a half ago. I am so happy. He isn’t perfect but I have been treated better than I ever have before. Before I met him, I had no intentions on getting married or having children. Now that has changed after meeting him.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Lo-Key/100002513553299 Lo Key
  
  WELL Put!
kameria

I know that I’m not “wife material”, and I accept that about myself. Some of these statements apply to me, but I know at least I’m not wasting my life chasing after a ring. As far as not liking “his” kids…..That stood out to me the most becuase often time it’s hard for a woman who has kids to find a decent man, and one who is willing to marry them at that. Maybe it might be my age showing, or it might just be me, but I know what I don’t want, and what I’m not settling for.
DUMBBEACHPLEASE

I JUST WANNA KNOW WHY NO ONE IS EDUCATING THEM HOW TO BE A REAL MAN AND HOW TO BE A GOOD HUSBAND? WHO ARE YOU GROOMING US FOR? CASTING PEARLS TO SWINE, IF YOU ASK ME.
FromUR2UB

Oh, c’mon. People who possess these traits marry every day. The fact that someone was willing to overlook someone’s particular flaws and marry them anyway, doesn’t mean they’re more worthy of marriage. Men don’t change who they are to marry or be in relationships. When they love a woman enough, it doesn’t matter whether she wears a few of those traits, as well as dances on tabletops and swings from chandeliers, they’ll marry her. It often seems that the women who give men the most grief, are the ones they love most intensely. So be a sweet, considerate, good girl if that’s who you are. But don’t try to adjust to a man’s whims because if you’re not who he wants, it won’t matter what you do.
- Ash
  
  I agree, but remember the divorce rate in this country was at 50% in 2008. (I think it would have went up if people could afford to get a divorce through this rough economy.)
SK

There are men who have these characteristics as well…
- Courtney
  
  the author says that in the first paragraph of this article, – she says it applies to men as well, but since this site is geared towards women, that’s why it’s written from a woman’s perspective. There have been articles here describing traits that he won’t make a good husband too.
DidSheReallyGoThere

Nice article….but what about #8: Overly Ambitious….? So what? I wanna be ‘Oprah Winfrey, Jr.’ in regards to my finances?!?! I’m in my [very] early 30′s. Spent my 20′s with an engagement ring or two on finger….with Labor and Delivery in-between. Sadly; my wedding was not to be. One of the best people on the planet unfortunately succumbed to a heart attack (at the alarmingly young age of 33) right before it was to take place. It’s not too many men that can honestly accommodate the Package that I am. I WILL NOT compromise my career aspirations to assuage the fragile insecurities which the conventional Institute of Marriage premits; which tragically results in far too many wives losing themselves and putting their dreams on the back burner. Send me a Do Right Man with his OWN life….who’s willing to sign the prenup and accept me hyphenating my last name….and we’ll just see how much I love David’s Bridal after all! Jill Scott and Terry McMillan put a powerful bug in my ear…..
- polymathk
  
  Both of those women are single, and that don’t look like its going to change for either of them. I think women are fooling themselves when they scream that independent stuff. There are men out there willing to support your ambition. I think what turns a good man off is a self absorbed woman. A woman who is not willing to aknowlege that there is more to life than making money. Life is about relationships. And there are few relationships in life that are as empowering as a good marriage. A good man adds to your ambition, and there are good men out there, your ego may be putting them off.
- Meeow
  
  And that is why many successful rich women are single. Relationships are about compromising and being a team. If you aren’t willing to compromise and make it all about you (MY money, MY life, MY career, etc.) then why do you need a man let alone a husband? What do they have to offer in a relationship that isn’t just about their ego and their ambition? Wanting a pre-nup, a hyphenated last name, etc. just sounds like a woman is afraid to give her all completely into a marriage, again, it boils down to HER. So when would his needs matter? Being financially successful and independent is great but having a big ego and a self-centered, self-righteous attitude is not, it’s a turn off and puts off men esp. when you see him more as a barrier, burden, or nuisance to your independence.
La-Di-Da

On number 4, I actually have a friend whose father basically bounced on her & her siblings because his new wife didn’t like them and didn’t want kids. SMH, and they’re all grown kids so it really didn’t make a lick of sense. It’s a shame, but I guess that’s an exception to that rule..
- quest
  
  This happens way to often and we can blame both men and women. Some women don’t care if a man is involved with his children or not. I personally don’t want to date a man who is not in his childrens lives. Thats crazy.
  - DidSheReallyGoThere
    
    It’s a sad but true…quieter-kept side of many folks’ obsession with Matrimony. There’s no excuse for children (who never asked to be born; by the way) having to experience the painful rejection that comes with their idiot parent/s choosing to accommodate the insecure demands of their new partner who’s clearly dangling their fear of being alone over their head. I pray that God reserves a special section in hell for these pathetic excuses of human beings—-and that he sends a profound comfort and healing to the innocent kids who have to suffer that Bull.
Candacey Doris

I think this list goes for men and women both.

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