Representing For The Single Mothers: Nia Long and Sons Cover Essence

June 29th, 2012 - By Alissa Henry
"Nia Long Essence"

Source: Essence.com

We haven’t quite hit July yet, but Essence magazine has already revealed its cover for August.

41-year-old actress Nia Long and her two sons 11-year-old Massai Zhivago Dorsey II and seven-month-old Kez Sunday Udoka grace the cover of the late summer issue.

In the cover story, “Single, satisfied and raising her boys”, Essence quotes Nia Long saying “I’m in my forties, post baby and I’m thinner than I’ve been in years. The last step will be letting my hair go natural. That’s when you’ll know I’m free…”

The magazine’s website says:

We’ve all watched Nia Long grow up on-screen. At 41, with her pixie cut and eternally young good looks, she’s the hip-hop generation’s fantasy girlfriend. Now as she embraces life with her sons (including a new baby!), her partner and a reconnection with her father, the star tells Essence that she has never felt more fulfilled.

Like the Reggie Bush and Dwayne Wade/Gabrielle Union covers, this one has already ignited some controversy. Many balk at the actress’s decision to have two kids by two different fathers and will undoubtedly see the cover as praising a less-than-ideal situation. That’s not completely fair though to Essence or to Nia Long. The actress is not starting a trend of single motherhood. Her reality is the reality of many, many women of all races.

Earlier this year, USA Today reported that a whopping forty percent of all children are born to unwed mothers — and nearly eighty-percent of black children today are born to unwed mothers. Celebrities are not exempt from this statistic and the facts remain: unplanned pregnancies happen. Those statistics are staggering, but considering how many people are out here having sex, getting pregnant and then having abortions, the numbers should be much more.

Essence isn’t praising unprotected sex, they’re celebrating a woman who will probably serve as an inspiration to the scores of other women who have found themselves in the same situation. Let’s be real, some people looking down their nose at Nia Long are probably some of the same ones who were praising God for His grace and mercy when their…um…how did LHHA’s Joseline put it?…”fairy godmother” came this month.

Don’t get me wrong. Personally, I’m all about marriage and waiting to have kids until then, but that’s not everyone’s reality (or desire) and it’s not up to Essence Magazine to play pretend like it is.

What do you think about Nia Long being on the cover?

Follow Alissa Henry on Twitter @AlissaInPink

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  • Getyalife

    The fact that you had to even write and article on Essence.com to justify putting Nia and her beautiful boys on the cover is just sad. Until people learn to mind their business and stop reading to far into someone’s situation, we will continue to read “justification articles”. People are always going to have something to say about what another person does but as long as you are not “putting 5 on a bill” of theirs, simply shut up and mind your business. You know not of what you speak or type. Always judging. And by the way, marriage does not guarantee anything…those of of divorced, can attest.

  • Nope

    Nia Long is the prototypical used-to-be-a-hot-chick-and-it-girl, but fell off.

  • Gimmeabreak78

    Nia and her sons are gorgeous, and while I’m sure her family is happy, healthy, and well-adjusted, I take a litte bit of umbrage at the title of the article: “Representing for the Single Mothers…”. A more appropriate (not to mention more accurate) title would have been “OVERrepresnting for the Single Mothers”. No matter how much we would like to paint a pretty picture of the situation by putting a beautiful movie star and her sons on the cover of a magazine, the truth is the single black mother meme has grown out of control, and I’m not afraid to say it. Single motherhood may be fine for Nia Long and other Hollywood types with the resources to hire nannies and private tutors, etc., but Ms. Long’s life is far from the reality that most black single mothers face. I’m not knocking Ms. Long at all, but I am disappointed that Essence magazine is glamorizing single motherhood. Let’s stop glorifying the missing black man in the black family narrative.

  • DCDIVA

    here we go with this again! similar to the age gap in Nia Long’s kids, my brother and I are 12 year apart, and yes, we have two different fathers. Both men, my mom had long term relationships with, but marriage just didn’t happen (and thank goodness she didn’t marry my father, but thats a different story). How about we stay out of this grown woman’s sex life, see that she is happy with her kids and doing great with them. and yes, she is technically “single” because she’s not married, but her and her partner now seem happy.

    Geesh!

  • Creation1

    Why didn’t they portray Twin Mowry (Tia & Tamara). they repeatedly show the same celebrities. At this point, I wish they would return to putting black models to work.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JAI4SRENU2A5WKRTELXXYJPDSI Kayla

    I am so sick of this delusional fantasy all woman are forced fed, that their not a real woman unless the close their pretty little legs until marriage pop out a few kids, and live in a nice house with a white picket fence. While there is nothing wrong with kids after marriage in itself, the truth of the matter is everyone’s circumstances are different. You have plenty of children who grew up in the “ideal” home, and grew up to be horrible adults, and you also have children raised in single parent households that turn out to be wonderful and productive adults. So please society stop feeding us this cookie cutter situation, that you force on all of us woman. And anyone that doesn’t fit that mold is shamed…. Hello? This isn’t the 1950′s… The most important thing is that the child has two loving parents who love and care for his needs.

    • victoria

      Yes, Kayla we know that you are opposed to ALL type of traditions…

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JAI4SRENU2A5WKRTELXXYJPDSI Kayla

        I said there is nothing wrong with having kids after marriage. But please stop the BS like it’s the only right way to do things. And turning up your nose at other woman who don’t uphold YOUR traditions..

      • grateful

        i thought i was the only one who noticed…

  • Knowthefacts

    I see kids in two parent homes all the time who grow up into adults that have way more issues versus the ones in single parent homes. More often than not the parents are staying together in the two parent home for financial gain and in name sake. When in reality, they hate each other’s guts.

    • victoria

      Why do single mothers, like you, insist on pretendng that raising kids in a single parent home is equivalent to raising kids in 2 parent homes? Being a mother means wanting the best for your kids…teaching them to learn from your mistakes and making the proper decisions to have a decent life. Please stop pretening that children from single mother households arent more likely to participate in gangs, become drug addicts, end up in prison, drop out of school, be sexually molested, have behavioral problems. Do your research. What you said is statistically incorrect. Check out Adminisration of Children and Families, Statistcs nd Research

    • Misty

      There is no doubt that there are children from nuclear families with issues but BY FAR, children from homes where both parents are married do way better than children from single parent households. So your theory does not hold water.

  • ibdyw5

    She’s a beautiful woman and, her children are precious and a gift from Jehovah, God. I won’t judge her for having kids outside of marriage. At least she is being a responsible parent.

  • babegurl

    Typical comments from Black women…..”see nothing wrong with having kids out of wedlock”….and we wonder why the Black community is so f*ucked up in comparison to other races. smdh.

  • nisha136988

    Reading some of these comments irritated me to the max. Especially these women that comment “a person should get married and get to know their partners before having kids” should have several seats for looking down on her. I’m not saying that kids shouldn’t come after marriage (Biblically) but just because you are married doesn’t mean you can’t end up being a single mom. Some people grow apart, and regardless what anyone say you will never fully know any and everything about a person. You don’t know anybody personal struggles so before you judge think before you speak. And to say that single mom’s can’t raise a successful person then you need to do your homework. I think Nia looks amazing. People act as though her kids are 9 months apart. For all you know she probably did really got to know these men. (stepping off my soap box)

  • she

    Although i have no kids, i will deffo pick up this overseas, it reflects society as it is now and nia’s Caribbean roots you see this often.

  • FromUR2UB

    Why are we still calling them “unplanned pregnancies”. If there was no action to prevent it, then ya planned to get pregnant. This isn’t the 1950s when a woman’s only viable option for the prevention of pregnancy was abstinence. There are so many birth control products available these days, that there’s no reason for an, “Oops!” unless you’ve stepped out of a time warp.

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