Call Me Prejudiced, But I Only Let Black Women Do My Hair

June 27th, 2012 - By Alissa Henry

Source: healthxtourism.com

A few years ago, I was at a local hair school and flat out told the receptionist (loud enough for everyone to hear) that I would wait all day if it meant waiting on a black girl to do my hair. It was not my proudest moment, but I admit I have a serious complex when it comes to letting women who are not black style my hair.

I’ve been that way ever since “the hair incident”. It happened when I was seven years old. I had a thick mane that reached the middle of my back. My mom would braid my hair, put it in ponytails and press it with a hot comb, but her hard work rarely lasted past recess as I had dreams back then of being the first girl in the NFL and used touch football games with the boys on the playground to practice. I was a roughhouser, but I wanted my hair straight. Looking for an easier way to manage my hair, my mom let her white friend Christina – who was a licensed cosmetologist and had been doing my hair for the past year and a half – put in a relaxer.

I remember sitting under the dryer that fateful day and I reached up to feel the top of my hair. It was rock hard as though she had smoothed a thick layer of ProStyles black hair gel from my roots to my ends. I tipped the hooded dryer up and whispered to my mom, “My hair feels hard.” Overhearing, Christina replied, “It shouldn’t feel hard.”

I don’t remember much else after that, but my mom says, later she was combing my hair and immediately noticed it was falling out in chunks. In addition, I was completely bald around the edges. My mom says my hair felt hard and jagged and she had never seen anything like it. She asked her friend what happened and Christina said she “got a hold of a bad perm”. She hypothesized that maybe the “Super” was in the “Regular” container. All I know is, I haven’t seen Christina since.

Not wanting to go completely bald at any point, a new (black) hairstylist helped me transition. She eventually cut off the scraggly, damaged, ends when my new growth finally reached my shoulders about a year later. By the time I was in 5^th grade, the remnants of the relaxer that destroyed my hair were gone, but the memory of the white woman who did it was not and I swore my allegiance to black hairstylists from then on.

Lately though I’ve been wondering if this stance has any merit. There are scores of black women who will tell you about the time a relaxer damaged their hair — and that relaxer was applied by a black woman. In my case, I assume my stylist didn’t have any experience applying chemicals to black hair, (how else would she have accidentally applied a Super?) but does that mean all white women don’t know what they’re doing when it comes to black hair?

One day, probably fifteen years after the hair incident, I let a white girl wash and flat iron my hair. My roots weren’t completely dry when she flat ironed my hair, so, of course, about 30 minutes after leaving the salon it was like I never went.

I had the same experience with a girl whose nationality I cannot pinpoint. Then, I had a great experience with a white beautician in a Walmart salon. I initially refused to let her do my hair, but she told me a license is a license and promised that she could straighten anyone’s hair. Reluctant but desperate, I let her give it a try. She washed; deep conditioned, blow-dried and flat-ironed my hair in 60 minutes flat. I was impressed, but I am still not totally convinced.

My instant reflex is to firmly decline when a white girl (or someone who isn’t black) offers to do my hair. I know that it was only one serious incident and others have had poor results from black cosmetologists as well, but I just cannot sit comfortably when the person doing my hair isn’t a black female. Is this a form of discrimination or just common sense? All black hair isn’t created equal and I know that just because a person is black doesn’t mean she knows what she is doing with my hair in particular; but I am about one thousand times more willing to try my luck with a black hairstylist than a non-black hairstylist. If it helps, I don’t let men do my hair either.

What do you think? Do you let people of other nationalities do your hair?

Alissa Henry is a freelance writer living in Columbus, OH. Follow her on Twitter @AlissaInPink or check out her blog This Cannot Be My Life

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wveronica7

I’m moving to Orlando soon. Does anyone know any great black salons?
- http://twitter.com/NewNaturalSista Royal
  
  Im from florida and just to let you know Orlando has a lot of black owned hair salons. I been one but dont remember the name tho t was like6 yrs ago lol
  - wveronica7
    
    So am I but I have been away too long. I am looking for a salon that specializes in “hair care” not just extensions (I don’t wear them). That’s the issue I’m running into while searching for a salon
FamuRattler85

My experience with black beauticians is that they are scissor happy so I got to “white salons” to have my ends trimmed, a blow dry and on occasion, flat ironed. I won’t trust them with a relaxer so I stick with the sistas for those. I don’t really like going to white salons when my new growth comes in too much because they act scary and perplexed by what to do with my texture. How are they supposed to know how to work with my type of hair if they don’t grow it AND aren’t really trained how to work with it?
Ladybug94

Alyssa, you do have issues especially if you are yelling at a salon. I wouldn’t call you prejudiced though, just misinformed. When I lived overseas, there was initially no black person I knew of to do my hair, so my mom had this white hairstylist do it and she actually did a good job and my hair was still in my head afterwards. As with any service, you just have to find the right person with the right skills.
http://twitter.com/JPie612 JPie612

This makes me laugh because I am also very particular about who does my hair and I never realized that I am extremely reluctant to go to someone who isn’t black. I did let a white girl cornrow my hair back in high school but she had all black friends so I don’t think that really counts. Ha! I’m sharing this & polling my friends.
Ai

First of all, STOP getting your hair done at Walmart. Who does that?? Second I’ve had a few Hispanic women style my hair in a Dominican salon, so it depends on the salons reputation, not the color of the
stylists skin.
- Ms_Sunshine9898
  
  Walmart has salons. Just because the salons happen to be in walmart does not make them inferior or the stylist any less certified. I suggest you stop being so bougie and follow your own advice – follow the salon’s reputation. . .
  - MLS2698
    
    I went to JCPenny’s salon for over two years weekly before I went natural. They have a mix of employees. My stylist is black, and I still see her for a color rinse. So, yeah, it’s the stylist, not the building.
wveronica7

Funny, I prefer gay black men. So I guess I am sexist? I always have better results with men than women. However I am open to women, as long as they are not scissor happy and favor spritz.
- Ladybug94
  
  Men stylist get scissor happy to, that’s why I no longer go to him.
NONNI

i would let a white/asian person style my hair just that everything else relaxers et al i leave to my black sisters and i specifically get my braids/cornrows done by my african sisters…they are real good at that
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Ashley-Sykes/1065177536 Ashley Sykes
  
  they ARE trained in it. stylists learn how to do ALL hair. black hair,asian hair and caucasian hair.. the thing is, you have so many black women who don’t want other races doing their hair. you would see non black stylists go their entire career without working with black hair because so many black women prefer to go to only black stylists. do you think all the stylists in hollywood that do black women’s hair are black? NOPE!
  - Angel
    
    To say that they are trained to do all hair is untrue.Alot of them will. even tell u straight up that they cant do”ethnic” hair.
FromUR2UB

That’s not prejudiced; that practical! I won’t let every black person do my hair. Let someone who hasn’t lived with textured hair get in it? Absolutely not. I don’t even like men doing my hair because every male stylist I’ve ever had was heavy-handed.
http://twitter.com/MadameGigglez chopped it off!

Only once did someone who wasn’t black do my hair, they were Eqyptian and I hated it! So… Yea I agree if you not racist but… Not happein
CA Pullen

I only blacks do my hair only. I am trying to help GOOD black businesses that provide GREAT service stay in business. PLEASE SUPPORT BLACK BUSINESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
- Chris
  
  Good customer service comes in all colors. But Some black people look at me funny because I am a white man running a natural hair care store and salon. Who was it that said we shouldn’t judge a person by the color of their skin? How quick people forget.
  - MLS2698
    
    We just don’t want to be the” practice model” for knowing how to do all types of hair. And, many of us are just learning about our own hair, after many years of giving in to the notion that our hair has to be straight.
  - gracie
    
    I agree, the colour issue starts with the same people against it. I am African and was surprised how shallow minded people are in this country.
carrentho

i never had a problem letting other races do my hair UNTIL i asked for a slight cut(my hair was short but i needed it cut a little shorter so i could put in a texturizer) anywho she was cutting then i heard and uh-oh she called a black coworker over and told him she never worked on “ethnic” hair before(i wish she would’ve told me i wouldn’t have been offended) after everything was said and done i had to have the little hair i had completely shaved off!!! so never again
nay

I did once at the May Co. in Randall Park Mall in Cleveland….but not since then… no way
Chani

…….This is quite hilarious to me, because I am the other way around. In Milwaukee, Wisconsin I only let non-blacks do my hair because the quality of services knocks most black salons out the box 100 times. I used to go to black salons all the time, the best of the best here in Milwaukee until one day i went to Regis in the mall and they hooked me up. I didnt know that my hair could actually grow this long and look so beautiful with out a million products and just a few moments of time. The differences I’ve encountered between supposedly white hair salons vs black salons were tremendous.
1) If my appointment is at 3, then I will be in the chair no later than 3:03. In black salons, Ive had to wait several hours for my appointment and thats totally unacceptable.
2) They use quality products such as Mizani. Most black salons use Motions or some other low quality bullsh!t
3) My hair flows in the wind. Most black salons use oil sheen and other heavy oil products that weigh your hair down. Most black salons have lazy stylists who like to put you under the dryer so that they can start on another head. But sitting under the dryer is not really healthy for your hair and its time consuming. “White salons” blowdry your hair.
4) They respect me and focus on me. “White salons” do a proper consultation and make sure that you know everything that will be done. They do not accept street peddlers selling hot goods or socks in their place of business distracting the client or the stylist. Your appointment is YOUR appointment.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Charisse-A-Hill/100000096390580 Charisse A Hill
  
  chile please. Are you serious?????? Here in Houston Tx, we hv many blk salons that will give you that sort of treatment so u can have a seat somewhere. Oile sheen for your info is very healthy for your hair and by the way blowdrying is probable the worst type of heat styling besides flat ironing.
  - TatumPascal
    
    Chani was talking about her experience in Milwaukee, that is a bit aways from Houston.
  - Ms_Sunshine9898
    
    a lot of salons in houston. i’ve been here for a few months and i’m still having a hard time finding a decent one so i can’t say i agree with that. . .
- Amija James
  
  There are good salons out there. If people stopped going to the bs salons that make you sit all day, they’ll change it up. I know at my salon, I’m in and out, my stylist picks her clients, and we’ve never had street vendors walk into the shop. Oh, and I live in Northern California, not Oakland, where black salons are hard to find.
  - FromUR2UB
    
    If you live across the bay from Oakland, I KNOW you have a hard time finding black salons, because it’s hard to find black people over there now. I know a lot of people who left the city and moved to the East Bay, but all I saw the last time I was out there are Asians and whites in S.F, and Asians in Daly City…even the bus drivers. It’s eerie, like the mothership landed and swooped up everybody.
    - Amija James
      
      I’m from EPA and now Iive in the South Bay. EPA has a small pocket of black people so when I go there it feels funny to see black faces. I HATE living in the South Bay. Even when I do see black people, well, you know how the SB is. Ugghhhh!
- FromUR2UB
  
  You can’t find ANY black salons that use good products and respect your time? You might have to pay them more than some of the other stylists, but its hard to believe there are none in a metropolitan city. I’m pretty sure you’re paying for those services at the white salon. And heat is heat. Whether it’s blowing on your hair from a bonnet dryer or a blow dryer, it’s still going to have the same effect. I know their ice is supposed to be colder, but I didn’t know their heat is cooler or healthier.
- Ladybug94
  
  I agree on the oil/grease thing. I hate grease in my hair yuck. Hair is supposed to move not look plastic.
- Jimowife
  
  Oh so true, but there are black salons that do this to. At the end of the day its not the race of the stylist that matters, its the products they use and how they treat your hair, i stop going to hair salons that put me under the dryer and use cheap brands on my hair, my stylist blow dries my hair and use the expensive stuff and my hair is always flowing not stiff. My hair is so healthy. Black women need to stop complaining about having long hair if its not in your genes it wont grow long, your hair will grow a certain length then it will stop. I know girls with natural hair all of their life and they treat it well, but their hair is not long, it grows then stay a certain length, unless you are mixed in some kind of way. Healthy is more important than length to me.
  - MLS2698
    
    Can you please repeat the ” long hair” statement? I wish black women would stop being ” in search of ” LONG hair. It is, in some cases, not genetically possible. Healthy hair is best.
- Ms_Sunshine9898
  
  Mizani? really? that stuff that makes your hair come out good at first and then start eating it away after a while? umm no thank you. . .
Jess3

I used to think black women only. I once had good luck with a wary white woman (I more or less coerced her into doing my hair; I told her I’d let her know if she was doing anything ridiculous), and in college, I would frequent a black Brazilian woman, who was awesome.

My current stylist is a black man. The salon seems primarily staffed by black men, and I have not ever, EVER seen anyone leave that salon with a bad head of hair. They also like to put on pageants and fashion shows, so perhaps that’s why. My hair was maybe chin-length when I started, and now it’s past my shoulders.

In the past, I’ve gotten all sorts of lip and extra charges from black women, since “we don’t do natural hair unless you want a relaxer put in!” or “oh, but it’s so thick!”.
Upgradedkittenheelskenya

The Dominicans are the worst they use cheap products and talk ish about you in Spanish like they’re not black
jordyn

I had a white stylists back in my senior yr. of HS. He actually told me that I didn’t need relaxers in my hair. He’s one of the reasons why I decided to go natural. BUt, he did burn my mom with a relaxer .
Anon

I only let men style my hair and I only allow white people to cut/trim my hair…. I’ve found that black women have hair envy and will chop my hair to smitherines! No bueno. And I’ve only had men style my hair so I don’t see a reason to change lol. I think this comes down to preference and comfortability.
- Tee
  
  I agree with you totally. I prefer white women to cut my hair and black woman get scissors happy and destroy your hair.
Lexi

I’ve always been particular about my hair because I’ve been natural all my life so by default, I usually investigated the salon and prices before going to a stylist white or black. I’ve had my male stylist David for 2 years now and I love him. I will probably never leave him unless he moves out of state or passes on. I typically looked for stylists who do natural hair, much of whom, to my finding, have been black.
GLAMOUR

I cannot recall a time in my life when a non-black touched my hair. The experience the author went through was very traumatic, so I can definitely understand her reaction. I would have some serious PTSD after that. I say stick with what makes YOU comfortable–after all, it’s your hair and your body!
- Nay
  
  Yes, I think you are right!
angel

No I do not let non black women do my hair.i used to go to the dominicans but I now see how big of a mistake that was
- Anon
  
  ……. but dominicans (majority) are black. I have yet to go to a dominican shop and see a white dominican doing black hair.
  - Angel
    
    At the shops that i went to most of them were mixed…and they were terrible at doing hair.the only time my hair was ever done right was by the ONe black dominican at the shop…all others sucked

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