Boy, Please: 8 Signs You’ll Just Never Be Into Him

June 7, 2012 ‐ By Julia Austin
"Young couple drinking and flirting"

Everyone wants to be with someone, so much so that we’ll date all the wrong people: the ex, the bad boy, the friend with benefits that we try to turn into more and, of course, the guy that just doesn’t make us swoon no matter how long we wait. But women will wait a long time because sometimes we’ll do anything to pretend someone “special” is in our life. Stop wasting both your time and his. If any of these items strike a chord with you, you’ll never be fantasizing about this guy late at night in your bed. There’s more fish in the sea, and it’s time to keep looking…

"Man waking up his girlfriend"

You can’t see yourself sleeping with him
This is a great thing to do on a first date: picture this man lying on top of you naked. How does that make you feel? There isn’t any particular way it should make you feel, but it definitely shouldn’t make you feel uncomfortable, nauseated, embarrassed or suffocated. Even worse, you shouldn’t struggle to conjure up the image at all. Look, if you’re going to be with this guy for more than a short time, sex will likely be a part of your relationship. If you’re not comfortable with that thought, you’ll never be into him.

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  • Jones

    This is all true, but trust me it gets worse as we get older. I’ve been told enough times that I must be single because I’m an “angry” black woman or my standards are too high. And so I’ve been on countless dates with awkward, self-conscious guys who stare at their feet during the entire date or the obnoxious guy who starts sentences with “I usually don’t bother to date black women, but…” or “I need to see a full body picture of you before I agree to go on a date with you” and “How many guys have you slept with?”

    I guess if deciding these guys just aren’t right for me means that my standards are too high then that says a lot about what you think of me.

  • mysterykills

    Things that made me wonder. Like how is it that you hit it off so well with some, and not with others, despite all their efforts ? Is it in our makeup to attract some and repel others ?

  • billy bob

    Lmfao sad but I’m like this with every guy

  • lis

    Im in this position right now and it suckss

  • Hello Love

    Been there, done that… sadly twice. You know if you have chemistry with a guy or not, and chemistry can’t be forced. I learned this the hard way. Thank God for growth.

    • yeah… i dont wanna meet his family and… i dont want him to meet mine… if that makes me a b33yotch then… so be it.

  • Whitney

    This is so true and hilarious to me, because this applies to my life at the current moment. I’m 24 and just waiting on a certain someone to give me butterflies. I used to think man am I crazy for wanting to feel butterflies with someone but I know what I want and what I deserve. I guess I should just stop playing pretend with the ones that aren’t so interesting to me.

    • Hello Love

      Cut your losses now and kick rocks. It’s only fair to him as well.

  • Janay

    You’re just not that into him

  • No matter how great a guy is, if his family is truly messed up, I can’t get all the way into him. When you marry the man, you marry his family.

    • L-Boogie

      This is the truth, Peaches. You hit the nail on the head. PREACH! But that also goes for a woman’s family as well.

    • Annelli

      I have to agree PARTIALLY…LOL..LOL…..if a guy has great character and good morals and values, I would be willing to overlook that esp. if he doesn’t let his family get in the way. And I don’t believe that when you marry him you marry his family—that’s not even biblical. The Bible says when a man leaves his family he cleaves to his wife and they become ONE. So if you feel this way, maybe it was the men you have chosen to date in the past. I’m more concerned with character and morals—if those are in tact and he has a messed up family, he won’t be around his family that often anyways.

      • You’re right. I am however a different religion, so I was not aware of that. But, if a man has a child molester dad, a crackhead mom, a homeless brother, and a prostitute sister, I would find it hard to focus on his endearing qualities, no matter how wonderful he is. At some point, he is going to want to drop off our children to his family so we can have some time to ourselves. I don’t have any personal experience, so it is just speculation on my part. Thanks for the feedback.



  • L-Boogie