That’s What BFFs Are For: 5 Friends Every Girl Needs In Her Circle

12 Comments
May 8, 2012 ‐ By

Source: Essence

I think we could all run down a list of friends we don’t want nor need in our lives, but what about recognizing the great ones you have or want to have? It’s always nice to know what qualities are great to have in your girlfriends (and male friends) so that you can dismiss the users and abusers with the quickness. There isn’t one perfect friend, but there’s a few great ones you should try to keep an eye out for and add to your “team.”

  • The Ratchet But Lovable One: And by ratchet, I mean the friend who does a lot of questionable, crazy and just straight up stupid stuff from time to time. Whether it has to do with the men she messes with (that make you say to yourself, “Oh, girl…” *proceeds to shake head*), or the career choices she makes (she’s consistently undecided on what she wants to do with her future), she’s often calling you with a very interesting story to share. But outside of all that, she’s a great friend to help cheer you up. She (or he actually) has a lighthearted sense of humor and can make you chuckle like no other when you thought you were having the worst day ever. Yeah, she’s crazy, but she’s a loyal and lovable homie.
  • The Goal-Oriented And Understanding Friend: While being playful and fun is cool, you also need a friend who can understand your complaints about your career and life in general to give great advice. This lady is someone you can vent about your day to, talk about your aspirations with, and just get a second opinion from because they are going through the same stuff, or have in the past. You two are on the same wave-length and are accomplishing similar things in life. And this friend is helpful at also keeping you on your toes, and most importantly, on track, because she reminds you of the goals you want to reach, even when you’re ready to give up on them yourself.
  • The Girls Just Want to Have Fun BFF: A friend to listen to you and a friend to make you laugh is cool, but you can’t forget about the friend who helps pull you out of your shell. When you let yourself get swamped at work or held down by the everyday complications of life, this friend is trying to get you to take shots at the bar. She wants to go dancing with you, to check out that new movie, to go to that after work mixer, and to just keep your life a bit more spontaneous and fun. Who knew pottery could be such a stress reliever? She’s the one that will have you calling up your other friends with a cool (or crazy) story to tell the next day.
  • The Rational Homie: But after all the fun has been had, you need a friend who can help you make sense of your issues. Did your man really act like an a** at that party, or were you possibly overreacting? Do you really need another pair of those pumps, girl, or do you need to focus on trying to pay down those student loans finally? Does ‘ol boy deserve a second chance, or do you need to be reminded of the pain he put you in the last time? Rational homies aren’t really the most fun friends in the world, but they can keep your world from spinning off its axis from time to time.
  • The Reciprocating Buddy: MAN! Who doesn’t love a friend who appreciates the things you do for them, and is willing to do something for you in return? And without being asked!? Best. Friend. Ever. Too often you have those “friends” who ask you to drive places, jump in and out your car and never give gas. And did you have the “friend” who you gave some money to, but had to go to hell and back to get that money back from? Stingy and ungrateful friends are easy to find (sadly), but truly appreciative and giving friends are a gem to find. They offer you stuff and don’t make you feel like a burden, they help you with big tasks and are supportive, and they’re just overall good people that you don’t mind doing for. If you can find the friend who can give as much as they can receive, hold on to ‘em!

What other kind of friends would you add to the list?

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  • justme

    Have to say I’ve one sister that meets 4 out of the 5 and the other 2 out of the 5 and I love them to death and would do anything for them…for me the smaller the group the better. And all 3 of us are gemini’s so true sisters…love it

  • http://twitter.com/lilideedee Dahlia Beckford

    Why you need a ratchet friend though?

    • tiffanysince1987

      lol

  • Crystal

    I’m glad I have a friend or two that fit into all of these categories. Yay for great friends!

  • Barraka Wylie

    Very informative !!!!!! ;-)

  • http://twitter.com/vashtikk11 ♥♡PURE ESTROGEN♡♥

    You can’t go wrong with a goal oriented rational friend who totally gets you. lol. Partying and gift giving are vain, but someone who can help you be better mentally and emotionally is the best friend you can have. :)) I think it’s all up to the person though…we all have different values. 

  • LADYE1988

    I definately have the last one down for sure :-) I don’t kick it with as many girlfriends as I’d like…I was really shy when I was younger so I wasn’t as adventurous or outging as I am now at 23. The few that I did have, we just kind of fell out because our interests and lifestyles(i.e. kids,school, single) just weren’t the same anymore…I guess making friends for me is like dating for others- its kinda difficult if we don’t click AND have the same interests- it’s usually one or the other…I’m definately not opposed to doing things solo but,damn, some times it WOULD be cool to have a nice and cool  lil group to go to the Bahamas or the Essence Festival or even just a funky/chill  a** restaurant/lounge Downtown!!..

    • Achenelles

      I feel the same way!!! All my friends are married, with kid’s or have moved away. I need a true friend to kick it with….where are you located?

      • LADYE1988

        lol im super late!! I live in Minneapolis,MN…

  • Guest

    Some of these friends can be found in one person, which can keep the circle smaller and make the bond stronger.
    Another one to add is a variation of the “Rational Homie”, the “No Nonsense” friend…when you’re acting out of line because you had too much to drink at the club, or you’re getting into it with someone and you’re deadass wrong, or someone else is disrespecting you to the utmost, this friend will respectfully get everyone in check and dead the drama. 

  • LAME

    HA! My two best (and only really lol) friends are all 5 of these wrapped into two bodies. lol

  • L-Boogie

    My circle is definitely smaller; however, it is better that way.  I appreciate the ones that have stood with me.