Have You Ever Lied About Being On Birth Control?

April 20th, 2012 - By MN Editor

From BlackVoices.com

So you meet the man of your dreams, set up shop and make plans to grow old together. Then you find out that his plan does not include having children…ever.

Do you: a) run for the hills; b) give up your hopes of having a mini-me to call your own; or c) proceed with the marriage and then flush your contraception down the toilet so you can get pregnant anyway?

Last week’s episode of Cafe Mom Studios’ Coffee Shop Confessions took on the topic and, more broadly, the idea of lying to your spouse. The subject of debate? A mother who says that she stopped taking her birth control pills without her husband’s knowledge (and against his will presumably) and is now expecting their third child.

“Talk about deceitful!” says Timberly Whitfield, who co-hosts the 10-part YouTube series with Andrew Shue of “Melrose Place” and co-founder of Do Something, Alex McCord of the “Real Housewives of New York,” and actress and dancer Julie Knight.

An international survey conducted in 2009 revealed that spouses are most likely to mislead each other over their whereabouts, but most are far more scrupulous on matters related to sex, money and “the kids.”

For the complete story, visit BlackVoices.com.

 

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  • JERSEYVIXEN

    men will CONTINUE  to whine because they want that RAW DOG. Make the hard choice, wear condoms everytime…. no? ok, then shut up!

    • F3ral Anarchy

       what does your comment have to do with women lying about being on birth control?

  • Jane Doe

    Men don’t know what they want so sometimes they need a nudge. 

  • StarFruit

    I bet the hood-rats are notorious for this!! Smh…..

  • Pivyque

    Nope. Never had to. Always use condoms, so the “birth control pill” question never comes up.

  • Herm Cain

    Of course the sisters who have done this aren’t going to comment but this happens a whole lot that’s why you see so many absent fathers

    • It Takes Two

      Please!  If men made better choices with 1) who they have sex with and 2) realize they have a vested interest in using birth control as well, so many of them might not fall victim to women like this.

  • Kenedy

    What happened to communication? When you first start dating someone, don’t you talk about stuff like this…”do you want kids in the future? A family? Yes, no. Maybe?” Blah blah blah. Or do people wait until they get married then they are like “oh by the way, i don’t want kids”

  • F3ral Anarchy

    come on MN…you really think any women would admit to this lie?!  even though we know it has happened in the past, is happening now and will happen in the future, no woman will EVER admit to this. 

    • Pivyque

      Not true. Plenty of women at my job have admitted to lying to their husbands because they wanted “one more kid”. 

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JAI4SRENU2A5WKRTELXXYJPDSI Kayla

    That’s really low. If two people are contemplating marriage and one of you does not want kids. It’s wrong  to go behind your spouses back. How do you know some men won’t push you to get an abortion. If having kids is so important to you and he is dead set against it, then you must go your separate ways. You can’t compromise when it comes to kids, it’s either you have them or you don’t.

  • L-Boogie

    If you mislead someone into getting you pregnant – that is wrong. 

    • L-Boogie

      And honestly if I were a man, I would legally seek a termination of the pregnancy.  I do not believe in abortion but I also do not believe in using your reproductive rights as a means to secure oneself.  

      • LaLaLaMeansILoveYou

         lol while you make a good point, do you also realize that a man also has a right to use protection despite what the woman he is CHOOSING to lay with tells him, and if he gives up that right, it’s HIS fault if he has to “secure” said woman as he did not do what he should have done to prevent it. Was he raped? If not he needs to gtfohwtbs QUICKLY.

        Yes she is all kinds of wrong for “tricking” him, but when all is said and done and the child is here or even on the way, he has no one but himself to blame for HIS life’s decisions. A guy seeking legal termination of a pregnancy that he caused is like that man a few years ago that sued McDonald’s for his obesity IMO. Utterly ridiculous.

        • Pivyque

          You are right. He should wrap it up. It takes two to get pregnant. 

      • Lalatarea

        i had a discussion abt this in class. if a man clearly states he doesn’t wasn’t a child and the woman gets pregnant should he still be forced to provide? if a woman knows that the man doesn’t want a child and she gives birth and decides to keep the kid and he gives up his parental rights is it right to force him into fatherhood? women say my body, my choice, well since its ur choice shouldn’t it be all up to that woman to raise that child? just playing devils advocate.

        • LaLaLaMeansILoveYou

           I can understand that argument completely…it’s NOT right for the woman to try to get pregnant by a man who clearly lets her know he doesn’t want children. But when all is said and done, if HE feels so strongly about not having children, then HE needs to take the necessary protective measures to ensure that no child is ever conceived from HIS loins. It’s that simple to me.

          I only feel this way because in this day and age of women being able to take these men TO THE BANK in child support and the glorification of golddigging, any man should be smart enough to want to protect his assets. I have a son and you best believe that I will be teaching him to keep a tough watch on his “family jewels” in every way, because these females out here today are not playing around.

          Look out for yourself. If you’re a millionaire investing money with someone are you just going to give your money to them and “hope” and “trust” that they won’t take advantage of it, or are you going to keep a close watch on your investments yourself, every penny that you entrust to them accounted for? Stop playing the blame game and learn from others’ mistakes.

  • MixedUpInVegas

     
    What would be the purpose of “accidentally” getting pregnant if you knew it would cause major mayhem in your relationship? To push him to marry you? (Dishonest; either he wants to marry you for you or he doesn’t. Do you want him even if he doesn’t really want you?) To get your way and have a child even if you agreed together not to do so? (Dishonest; if you want kids that bad and he doesn’t, then maybe he isn’t the man for you.) To “solidify” your relationship? (Desperate; is that the only way to keep your man? Then what does that say about you and the relationship?)

    Kids cost more than a crack habit, and they tend to last longer than one. It isn’t a unilateral decision to make, since both parties will have substantial legal, moral and financial obligations for them for 18 years at the very least. It is beyond dishonest to bring a child into this world who isn’t wanted, planned for and prized; it is also dishonorable to all parties.

  • RedButterfly81

    Nope, never. My ex-husband and I planned to have our daughter together and did. I don’t ever want a baby if my next husband or I aren’t ready for it.

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