By Taylor Lea Thomas

Question:

Just engaged on Valentine’s Day! Help!!!

Taylor:

Congratulations on your engagement… and he proposed on Valentine’s Day! Awww, he’s so romantic. Remember to continue to keep the romance alive during your wedding planning progress. He started you on this wonderful journey you’re about to embark upon by proposing to the love of his life on the most romantic day of the year. Continue that romance throughout. Don’t switch it up on him during stressful times of wedding planning – and trust me, the stress will come. Here are some tips to guide you through the wedding planning process early on:

Give yourself plenty of time.

Enjoy the engagement period. Bask in the joy of all the well wishes and congratulatory hugs and kisses. It’s a good idea to space the wedding planning process over the course of a year. Some venues and churches have waiting lists for couples wanting to get married, and some of the best wedding planners and wedding photographers get booked quickly. By allowing yourself a lot of time to plan, you can enjoy this journey you’re about to embark upon with a little less stress.

Get organized.

Purchase a 3-ring binder with tab inserts. Keep proper record of everything – payments, vendor contracts, business cards, inspiration clippings from bridal magazines, guest list, etc. Purchase a calendar for things wedding related ONLY to keep track of appointments, meetings with vendors, cake tastings, menu sampling, scouting for the perfect venue, and more.

Don’t obsess over your wedding.

It’s easy to become overwhelmed with all of the things to be done in planning your wedding. A lot of my brides say to me, “I’ve never done this before,” and I always assure them that that’s a good thing, and that I hope they never have to plan another wedding again. You don’t have to know everything, and it’s okay if there are a few little hiccups here and there. It happens. No wedding is perfect in the same manner that no marriage is perfect. Relax, breathe and enjoy the process. You have a social life, friends and family. Do activities with them that don’t include talking about the wedding. Your wedding planning folder is not the Bible–it isn’t sacred. You don’t have to take it with you everywhere you go.

Remember that grooms are just not that into planning weddings.

Avoid bombarding your hubby-to-be with daily wedding things. I assure you that as much as he loves you, he’s not going to be as into the planning process as you are.  Grooms are notorious for that. It’s just like taking a man shopping for a dress or shoes – they’re just not as into it as women are. One of my favorite wedding quotes: “I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance, a church filled with family and friends. I asked him what kind of a wedding he wished for, he said one that would make me his wife.” And that’s all that matters.

Keep it in perspective.

Your wedding day is one day. Put as much effort into your married life as you would in planning your wedding. You have the rest of your lives ahead of you. The one single thing that makes a marriage legal are the vows exchanged in front of the witnesses who sign. A lot of people are not aware of that. It’s not the marriage certificate; it’s the vows. Make the words you exchange on your wedding day meaningful and heartfelt and don’t feel like you have to go overboard if you don’t really want to with planning your big day.

Don’t go into debt planning your wedding.

Set a budget and do not be tempted to exceed it. Do not go into debt in planning your wedding. Nobody wants to start a union with the stress of extra financial debt hanging over their heads. Read my previous article on lowering your guest count as it will guide you on dealing with the guest list since that factor determines every other aspect of the wedding planning process.

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