Lies About Men That Too Many Women Believe

March 16, 2012  |  
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If these lies about men weren’t circulating everywhere we turn, we wouldn’t pass up on great guys and giving the bad ones a chance daily.


Too busy to call

I don’t care how busy a guy is. Everyone goes to the bathroom. Send a text from there. So much conversation between girlfriends is about waiting for a guy to call or text, that we’ve become conditioned to think that’s a normal part of being with someone. Once you meet someone who’s crazy about you, you learn that, if they like you, they find the time to call or text. They are always, in the back of their mind, thinking about when the next time is they’ll be able to text. And they find that time.

If he doesn’t finish, it’s a problem

The problem most women are familiar with when it comes to the bedroom is a man finishing too soon. It’s supposed to be difficult for them to hold it in, not to let it out! So, if a man isn’t orgasming, we instantly believe there is something wrong with us. We aren’t good in bed. He is losing interest. He is cheating…But, for some men, when they are stressed, their sexual performance is the first thing to go. They are too in their heads to indulge in their animal instincts. Don’t jump to thinking something is wrong with you!

They can’t handle your emotions

Many women feel they need to hide their emotions from their men. That, when they feel they are going to become irrational or emotional about something, they should separate from their guy and return once they’ve cried or broken down alone, and can talk about it rationally. But, this can actually make men feel you don’t trust them, don’t think they can help you, and it can make them feel distant from you. You’re a female, he wants you to be one.

No one is treated like a queen

We’ve gotten too used to giving a guy a gold metal for bringing us flowers once in a blue moon. When you meet a guy who treats you like a queen and is just naturally always thinking of nice things to do for you, you’ll realize all the other guys were just lazy and were banking on the fact that most women have learned not to expect that type of treatment.

If he’s nice, he’s desperate

We’re so used to games that, if a guy is actually considerate, calls when he says he will, make plans with us ahead of time, we think he is desperate. We are closed off to the idea that maybe he just sees something special in us, and doesn’t do these things for any girl.

He doesn’t want to talk about it

Do you fear that if you put your arm around your man and ask sweetly, “What’s the matter?” when it seems something is weighing heavy on him, that he will feel belittled or smothered? Nuh uh. Actually, often a girlfriend is the only person a guy is talking to about things that are really troubling him. When he’s around his friends, he tries to remain calm and “fun.” He’ll probably be happy for a listening ear.


Sex on the first date is bad

Sometimes, a connection is just there. If you’ve had an awesome, long date, shared a lot, and clearly have personalities that connect…oh yeah, and you can’t keep your hands off each other…sleeping with each other might not change a thing. It might just make you want one another even more. But, go with your gut. If you feel he’s a good guy and not just trying to get laid, go for it. If you have any doubts, then hold off.

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  • topcommenter

    My ex and I had sex on the first night and we were together for 5 years. 

  • Rmickeyotr

    Timing is EVERYTHING!! If you are truly interested, call or text when you say that you willl…not 4hrs later, 4days, weeks or months!! Don”t cancel a date the day of the outing..or fail to call at all!! That shows poor integrity. Do men really value time the way that women do?

  • MixedUpInVegas

    You are right, MN, most of these are lies.  A man who is interested in you shows it–he’s calling you, making dates for the very near future, doing special things for you, showing you in his masculine way that he cares.  The ones who don’t simply aren’t all that interested.  Don’t make excuses for their clear lack of enthusiasm.

    Maybe there are men out there who think it is smart to play it cool and not show too much interest; those are men who are probably not on the same page as you are.  If he isn’t willing to show definite interest in you, then why be all that interested in waiting around for him??  Move on!  There’s a dude out there who wants to be with you.

  • GoodGuy

    if a girl is ready to sleep with me on the first date or has done so in the past with other men it is the one most significant signes that she is not a keeper. you cant make a h** a housewife, dont try to reinvent the wheel. 

    if you wanna ask chris humphries he has some experience to share with you….

    • Insecurities suck

      Sounds like someone is insecure. I slept with my now-husband on our first date and we’ve been together, drama free, for 9 years. Sometimes, you just have a connection. I don’t understand why so many men are intimidated by a woman’s sexuality. 

  • really???

    i feel like your last one is almost irresponsible given the recent STD and HIV infection rates and statistics among black women.people haven’t even gotten tested for Herpes which can also spread through skin contact even with a condom on…they haven’t had time to have a serious talk about s*xual habits…

  • darkman

    Treated like a queen? A queen is just the wife of a king so, she got no special treatment from her husband than any other woman… I think fairy tales lead too many women to deception because life isn’t a fairy tale… A man that treat you like a queen generally didn’t reach is goal yet… If he can keep the distance, then you really have king.
    The more important is a reciprocal respect. Respect  is real and last longer.
    By the way, in fairy tales,  the passionate lover is a prince (charming), not a king…

  • etimelod

    I have no problem calling a woman while I’m in the bathroom.  The problem is me telling them the truth about where I’m calling from. I tell them they don’t want to know. They say yes they do. So I tell them.

  • Christina

    I totally agree with #5!!! I had gotten used to douchebags that when a good one finally came around, I immediately wondered if he was desperate and needy. Nope! He’s just into me. 🙂

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    My wife and I had sex on the first night and we still together. It’s been eleven years!

    • really???

      if you were to survey other men do you think your situation would be the exception or the rule?

    • Guest

       Yeah I agree, I have never had much luck trying to time the first sexual encounter with a woman. The women that I have been with the longest were the ones that I had sex with very quickly. Maybe they could since I was worth taking a chance on. But if I’m not into a girl like that it would not matter how long it took for her to let me have some. Sex is only sex for men, there are other factors that go into a man determining if you will be a good partner, hope this helps.