A Final Word: What Drove Whitney to Bobby?

March 7th, 2012 - By MN Editor

 

source: http://www.mirror.co.uk

by Yvette Carnell

I’m not a defender of Bobby Brown. To the contrary, I’ve written derisively about his narcissism and excesses quite thoroughly in a previous piece. Bobby couldn’t manage Being Bobby Brown, so Lord knows he couldn’t manage being the rock for a star that shined as bright as Houston’s. Problem is, that’s what Whitney required. Looking back, it’s easy to understand why Houston chose Brown and what her expectations were. It’s also just as easy to understand why she thought she needed a man like Brown, what she was running away from, and what she thought she was running to.

In order to better understand Whitney’s journey, it may be beneficial to look at a star with a similar background, to fully understand how the two stories diverged. Much like Houston, Mariah Carey was also molded by a white and much older music mogul. Tommy Mottola was to Mariah Carey what Clive Davis was to Whitney Houston.
Carey spoke candidly about how controlling Mottola was during their marriage in a 2007 interview: “I have to forgive him for being so restrictive. I understand him not wanting me to go out and hang out all night, but going to a spa with friends every now and then, or doing things on my own would have made a world of difference.” One could even go so far as to speculate that Mottola married Carey as a way of taking full control over both her personal and professional life.

And one of the aspects of Carey’s personal and professional life that Mottolla kept a strong grip on was her connection to the black community. We all remember the ambiguousness that surrounded Carey’s race during the Mottola years; the videos shot in black in white, the white male love interests in her videos, Carey’s refusal to full throatedly address the issue of her race. We also remember how, after her divorce, Carey made a bee line into the arms of black culture and, eventually, Nick Cannon.

And since then, Nick Cannon has been Mariah’s biggest defender and protector. When rapper Eminem, who makes a living off being a nasty little critter, decided to spread rumors that he and Mariah had had a fling, it was Cannon who said, “I thought we got past the days where white men could spew vulgar obscenities at our beautiful queens and get away with it.”
Just as Carey would run into the arms of Nick Cannon, Houston took refuge with the bad boy of R&B, who appeared, at least from an outsider’s view, not to have allowed himself to be pushed around by anyone, not his New Edition band mates, not the media, not even producers who thought his bad boy image was over the top. This was the guy Whitney thought she was getting. He’s the man who she changed the name of her production company to Brown House Productions for.

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  • Nefijones1

    Whitney was a dressed up ”around the way girl” and she was comfortable with Bobby because they are both from da hood!  Stop putting all the blame on him. 

    As for Clive Davis – he was only interested in her making hits for him.  That’s it that’s all.  Hopefully he was a true friend, but his angle is purely from a business perspective.

    The author of this article probably didn’t even know Whitney Houston so this is only the authors spin and not what really went down. 

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/OAP2N4OY5KRN2OPFODONLZROKE Irene Nicole

      “She was comfortable with Bobby because they are both from da hood!” Enough Said! Kudos to that

  • Kynks

    Hmmmm…. Not sure I entirely agree with this piece, and the race thing is played out and boring…..  
    However, I think a lot of people forget that as talented and as beautiful as Whitney was, she was no saint.  Whitney did not start taking drugs after she met Bobby, nor was she a little wallflower who did exactly as she was told, no questions asked. Still the image she was made to present to the world when she was sitting on top of it is not who she really was.  That in itself is hard to deal with – it’s like having a split personality. Plus knowing that a large percentage of your own people ain’t really feeling you when you are being raised up by everyone else… No matter what you hear from others you want your own to love you first.  

    All of us have challenges, and we all deal with them different ways. But you have to remember how easy it is to get everything you want when you have money and how many are just willing to please – as long as they’re getting paid.

    There are more questions than answers as to why Whitney’s life travelled the path it did, and devastating for those who really knew her and loved her (especially Bobbi K) that she is no longer here.

    I think those of us who only heard her voice on the radio or on vinyl/tape/cd and only saw her on TV or the big screen should stop trying to lay blame and act as if we know all of what went on in her life.  The music industry is an out of control beast as it is.  Many have been chewed up and spat out, and many, many more will be.
    She will be missed and remembered. Just let her Rest in Peace, and let those who really know what was going on with her mourn.

  • Pinklady

    I disagree with the blaming Clive Davis.  Whitney chose her own path, just like m any other artists in the past.  It doesn’t matter what color you are to produce music, just be good at it.  Only Whitney knows why she was attracted to Bobbi, she got caught her up in his world and that is something you do when you love somebody really hard because you want it really bad.  

    • Oldstonya

      I don’t really know what you are trying to say**Yes I do disagree with what she said about Clive Davis. He loved Whitney but only on a professional level. When u are in Show Business, you are only out to make money*Not Friends. Your Talent is what draws Fans. Fans buying their Music is what makes them rich depending on Their Talent. Shoot I love Clive Davis Myself because he noticed her talent and Brought her to the light. Whitney adored him for that because that is what she wanted to do with her life***SING***She didn’t know the downfalls of being in show business but she loved being on that stage singing her heart out and Yes she fell in love with Bobby Brown, and when u fall in love with someone it is something that u just cannot help. I am sure before she said I do that she knew of his Bad Boy History**Drugs,DUI, all his children from different woman, him being arrested over and over again on his Sexual Drive on stage 2 girls that he would pull out of the audience. But she fell in love with all that, I think that is what made her crazy about him. Anyway Whitney R.I.P.

  • S Felix

    This was the most random speculation ive ever read

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/OAP2N4OY5KRN2OPFODONLZROKE Irene Nicole

      Random indeed….to say the least!

  • JACKIE

    MR. BOBBY BROWN GETS MY FULL RESPECT i never heard him say a nasty word about WHITNEY and he could have but made a CHOICE the same thing we can do to change and save our life and health…WE ON THE OUT SIDE LOOKING IN…and can only guess or if YOU as a PERSON that has or had a DRUG PROBLEM YOU KNOW THE SIGNS…you fight them every day BUT YOU HAVE A CHOICE TO STOP…ITS NOT EASY  you don’t know unless you T R Y…rest in peace WHITNEY

    • Ay

      Whitney said Bobby spit in her face once. He gets no respect.

    • Ay

      Bobby couldn’t have anything negative to say about Whitney because he was the abusive one.

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/OAP2N4OY5KRN2OPFODONLZROKE Irene Nicole

      I don’t have anything against Bobby Brown either,”you chose to be with whom you chose to be with” that is how I see things. however; I must dispute with you. Bobby Brown wrote a “Tell All” book and tried to release it the same year that him and whitney Houston’s divorce was finalised. He tried to ship his book to numerous publishers but was turned down at that time. Now it it said that he is trying to release the book again, now that Whitney Houston is no longer alive. Some excerpts from the book was released and he does a bit of bad mouthing Whitney….so yeah 

  • MissFLondon

    Yvette, I don’t disagree entirely but may I add that Whitney was alive and clean when she was working with Clive Davis.

    This was a case of keepin’ in real gone wrong. 

    I only wish that your article would have ended not with the white man and how he was at fault, but the real lesson learnt from both women. Sign your life away to a greedy man (black, white, asian, whatever) and there will be consequences!!! 

  • MissFLondon

    Yvette, I don’t disagree entirely but may I add that Whitney was alive and clean when she was working with Clive Davis.

    This was a case of keepin’ in real gone wrong. 

    I only wish that your article would have ended not with the white man and how he was at fault, but the real lesson learnt from both women. Sign your life away to a greedy man (black, white, asian, whatever) and there will be consequences!!! 

  • Netdandri

    Yvette, racist much?

    • Netdandri

      There is no valid connection between Mariah and Whitney here. Mariah was married to Tommy Matolla. Whitney was not married to, and never had a romantic connection to Clive. Mariah had an extremely controlling relationship that she left. Whitney might have had a disagreement with Clive, but he never had her locked and bound or in some unhealthy situation trying to control her. Whitney remained close to Clive. Whitney had an abusive relationship with Bobby. Mariah never had a physically abusive relationship. Whitney was on drugs Mariah was not.

      I go over all this to say you are truly grasping at straws. This whole article came off like you were trying way too hard to find some big bad white man to shoulder all the blame for Whitney’s problems.

      • http://profile.yahoo.com/OAP2N4OY5KRN2OPFODONLZROKE Irene Nicole

        I totally agree, I couldn’t find a connection between Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey here to save my life! I was so lost!

    • Netdandri

      There is no valid connection between Mariah and Whitney here. Mariah was married to Tommy Matolla. Whitney was not married to, and never had a romantic connection to Clive. Mariah had an extremely controlling relationship that she left. Whitney might have had a disagreement with Clive, but he never had her locked and bound or in some unhealthy situation trying to control her. Whitney remained close to Clive. Whitney had an abusive relationship with Bobby. Mariah never had a physically abusive relationship. Whitney was on drugs Mariah was not.

      I go over all this to say you are truly grasping at straws. This whole article came off like you were trying way too hard to find some big bad white man to shoulder all the blame for Whitney’s problems.

    • Netdandri

      The very first page you wrote says “Old white men aren’t always the best at shepherding the careers of young talented beautiful black women.” I’m a black woman, but I couldn’t help but notice your negative adjectives for white men and your all positive adjectives for black women. Then there’s the while premise that the race has something to do with their abilities as a mentor.

    • Netdandri

      The very first page you wrote says “Old white men aren’t always the best at shepherding the careers of young talented beautiful black women.” I’m a black woman, but I couldn’t help but notice your negative adjectives for white men and your all positive adjectives for black women. Then there’s the while premise that the race has something to do with their abilities as a mentor.

  • Netdandri

    Yvette, racist much?

  • Regina King

    Wow Sistah, should I direct my prayers to you? When are we as a race going to keep stop butting our sistahs down and embrace their will as women? Who warms you at night and keep your halleluiah’s in tact?This could have been an inspiring story, but you had to go pointing the finger and making judgements about woman that just loved her man. A woman that fought the demons in her life and died in the unwelcome battle. There has not been a woman that has walked this earth that has had someone perfect to love. How dare you shame the what she felt for another human being, someone in the same imperfect state as she was. If anyone is the blame, it’s people like you that pack the shame of your lives away and trample upon the innocence and mistakes of someone else. Are these the words a mourning child needs to hear about here parents? You should buy yourself a mirror, sit in front of, and play every song Whitney ever recorded so that you may understand the words that spell out the word love, and then read your bible. This way your soapbox won’t grow wheels and slam your ignorance into a brick wall. Grow-up, grow out and get you something of importance to write about. 

  • Regina King

    Wow Sistah, should I direct my prayers to you? When are we as a race going to keep stop butting our sistahs down and embrace their will as women? Who warms you at night and keep your halleluiah’s in tact?This could have been an inspiring story, but you had to go pointing the finger and making judgements about woman that just loved her man. A woman that fought the demons in her life and died in the unwelcome battle. There has not been a woman that has walked this earth that has had someone perfect to love. How dare you shame the what she felt for another human being, someone in the same imperfect state as she was. If anyone is the blame, it’s people like you that pack the shame of your lives away and trample upon the innocence and mistakes of someone else. Are these the words a mourning child needs to hear about here parents? You should buy yourself a mirror, sit in front of, and play every song Whitney ever recorded so that you may understand the words that spell out the word love, and then read your bible. This way your soapbox won’t grow wheels and slam your ignorance into a brick wall. Grow-up, grow out and get you something of importance to write about. 

  • Alicia Holmes

    Ok i was sceptical while reading…all i hav to say is Whitney God rest her soul new what she was doin (i had an issue with drugs for 5 mos clean 14 yrs) bobby was jus her enabler, had yes reading this didn’t know the depth of clive and Whitney’s relationship, but now clive does play a part…gone too soon i will always love Whitney

  • Gmarie

    Why is it so hard to fathom that Whitney was attracted to Bobby and  wanted him the same way you, me, or any other woman here has wanted a man before ? Why does there have to be an explanation for everything? There was a mutual (while maybe toxic) attraction and they clicked. it happens everyday. people meet, they like each other, they get together. nothing to see here.

  • Tagirl

    Half of the article is I can agree with but there’s another half that I think is utterly ridiculous. Whitney loved Clive after everything but Mariah didn’t/doesn’t love Tommy. Tommy literally tried to destroy Mariah’s career and while they were married, he controlled every aspect of her life.

    Personally, I think that Whitney chose the wrong savior. As you said, Bobby could barely handle being Bobby Brown. Whitney was an icon like Michael Jackson. Her star out shined Bobby but it appeared that she did everything she could to downplay herself for him.

     Clive,  on the other hand, seemed to be nothing but good for her professionally. I don’t think him being an older white man had anything to do with it. He was a good shepherd for her professionally. But when you work with someone that closely, you’re bound to have a personal relationship with them. He was like a father to her. Obviously he didn’t control her personally life, or he would’ve did everything he could to talk her out of getting with Bobby. As far as Clive coming off as a creepy at the funeral, I didn’t get that
    feeling. I got that he was reminiscing about the greatest protege that
    he’s ever had and one of the greatest the world has ever seen.

    If you’re going to talk about older men getting with their protege’s, Berry Gordy had a personal relationship with Diana Ross and they have a child together. People could say something about that. He was almost 20 years older than her and was the owner of her record label. Then you have Tommy who was 46 and Mariah was 19 when they got together. That was just all types of wrong. But Clive didn’t control Whitney like Tommy controlled Mariah.

    Professionally, it appeared that Whitney allowed Bobby to take over her career to appease him, which made him come off as insecure. I bought that 2002 “Just Whitney” album and was honestly appalled by
    it. That was a wrong move to let Bobby do that record. She was too great for that. Realistically, she wasn’t going to find a man that was her equal professionally but when she needed someone to turn to and protect her, I don’t think Bobby was that.

    It’s been said that Bobby and Whitney’s commonality was the environments where they were from. She was from the streets of Newark, NJ and he was from the streets of Boston. At the end of the day, she turned to the wrong people/places to be her savior as we as people often do when our only right solution is God.

    • Lsegundo25

      Enough Said!!!!

    • Lsegundo25

      Enough Said!!!!

    • Ngoziemereonye

      Love what you said, well put I tthink the writer of this article needs to write something better this article is rubbish!

  • Superfly78

    I’m sorry but this is some BULL S**T! Whitney made it very clear with her interview with Oprah, she herself was to blame for her drug use. No one else. Yes she was an icon. One of the best voices we’ll probably ever hear, but to say this person and that person was to blame. She was a grown woman… please take one_/

  • Skylineswkr

    Ridiculous! Whitney was talented and will be missed, but everyone wants to put her problems at the foot of everyone else’s door except Whitney’s.

  • Carebear

    I am tired of all them blame. I loved Whitney’s music and its sad what happened to her. But I believe people make their own choices. Bobby nor Clive put a gun to Whitney’s head and made her take drugs, and even if that is the case with someone, death is an extreme decision to make, but it is still yours to make. 

    • ThaTruthful1

       Those were my exact thoughts, Whitney has her own mind however she made some wrong choices(we all do sometimes)…There will never be another Whitney.

    • http://www.readywriterproductioncompany.com/ The-readywriter

      you better “preach”!!!!

  • Shemikamharris

    Excellent insight! I have shared the same theory with my friends. Well done.

  • Dee

    Stop looking for people to blame for Whitney’s demise you can’t blame anyone but Whitney not bobby not Clive just Whitney. As humans we were given the brain capacity to make our own decisions, allowing others to influence us negatively is also a decision WE make. At the end of the day it all comes down to choices. I’ve had people offer me drugs but it was still my choice to take it or refuse it and I did what I know is best for me I don’t drink nor have I ever done drugs of any kind.. Point of the matter is Whitney made the choice to dance with the devil , she made her bed so she has to lay in it

    • Goodnews

      Exactly…and this applies to all of us…only we can choose what path we take

      I

  • Mecca29801

    Wow. Never thought about the situation like that.

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