Why It’s Good To Stay Single

34 comments
January 26, 2012 ‐ By Charlotte Young

 

The next time your mother or girlfriend asks you how long you plan on staying single, tell them to be grateful for your singleness. CNN Money reports that the nationwide growing number of singles is powering the economy.

These days being single is in. Women and men alike have stopped bemoaning their inability to find “the one,” and have embraced a new culture filled with single-centric fun. Only 51 percent of adults today are married, and 28 percent of all households consist of only one person. It’s a new record in US history, but businesses are thankful for it. Singles spend more than their married friends, earning a higher income with fewer responsibilities. The Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that singles contribute about $1.9 trillion to the economy each year.

There are about 18 million independent single women in the US today, compared to 14 million men. Women from ages 18 to 34 comprise 5 million of that number, but they are the fastest growing section of independent singles. “I absolutely love having my own apartment,” Marsha Figaro told CNN Money. Despite her traditional Afro-Caribbean background, the 33-year-old has been living on her own since her twenties. “I can do what I want, when I want to do it, whether it’s eating, watching Hulu, going out, or just going to sleep. I definitely want to move in with someone when I find the right person. But it would be hard to give up all of this.”

Businesses are picking up on the strength of singles’ buying power. Ads are popping up featuring single women renovating bathrooms, driving around with girlfriends, and buying their own jewelry. The real estate industry is specifically catering to America’s increasing single phenomena and designing apartment complexes with more studio and one bedroom options as well as lush amenities such as party rooms, spa and billiards lounges that single’s tend to enjoy.

But singles aren’t just renting apartments; they’re also buying houses on their own. Women make up 21 percent of all buyers.  “Our salespeople are aware of this demographic and actually actively go after it. I go on the road all the time and tell all of our associates not to forget about single buyers because they’re everywhere,” Jim Gillespie, chief executive of the massive realty company Coldwell Banker said to CNN Money.

As single life steadily becomes the norm, the days when people thought singles were unhappy and lonely are becoming ancient history. Singles are having all the fun and enjoying fuller, more social and well-rounded lives. As Figaro recalls when she first took on independent single life, “it was totally liberating.”

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  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_IXWG6EXEZ3FX6RA7BR3UGSIX3U Ralph

    Black Americans have been tricked, bamboozled and fooled by white liberals since the late 60’s to self destruct. Look at us now, a doomed minority in America that is about to be extinct in the coming years.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_IXWG6EXEZ3FX6RA7BR3UGSIX3U Ralph

    KIR12 said a mouthful of hard truths that most black americans steadfastly deny!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_IXWG6EXEZ3FX6RA7BR3UGSIX3U Ralph

    Staying single isn’t for everyone. Some people thrive being single, while some languish with anxiety and depression.

  • RV

    I’m a young, Black, single professional. It does have it’s perks but this notion of everyone liking the fact that they’re single just does not ring true to me. All of my friends that are single have conversations with me about how they would appreciate having someone special in their lives to share those “luxurious experiences” with. I enjoy being single but definitely do not intend on staying single. As soon as the right man comes along, I’m his. :)

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  • Br8keit

    What do they mean, “Despite her traditional Afro-Caribbean background?” What does her ethnic background have to do with her relationship status? So sick of these damn racists. People are always hating on people with African descent. It’s time for this nonsense to stop.

  • DamnThatChucker

    Women should not feel like they need to be in a relationship to be happy. Being
    single is fun becuase you get a better sense of who you are as a person and do
    what you want without worrying about your significant other but I can definitely
    say I don’t want to be single forever…But for the people who do kudos to them!

  • Jssusi

    When marriage is all on everybody’s list, i wanna be single. Now I’ve learnt from their failures, I want to settle down, cause I know how to do

  • DamnThatChucker

    Women should not feel like they need to be in a relationship to be happy. Being single is fun becuase you get a better sense of who you are as a person and do what you want without worrying about your significant other but I can definitely say I don’t want to be single forever…But for the people who do kudos to them!

  • http://www.facebook.com/jcsnmbr1 Stephan A. Baker

    im single and happy in jesus.  i’ll be led to that right woman someday.  the glass is always half full for me.

  • Phoenix Reign

    Why is marriage looked at as a fun killer?? I’m married and I enjoy it! Every minute of it! Im just there for my whinny 33 y/o friend complaining about not being respected in her relationship, being expected to do wifey duties without being the wife etc etc…I go out with my husband because he is more fun than my friend. We have a good time because we are both young spirited while my friend is boring and by her being a super Christian, won’t do the things we do or go the places we go unless there is talk of God. Now don’t get me wrong, I could use a good spiritual encouragement now and then but enjoying like incorporated with. Single friends bore me now, and unfortunately I don’t have any married friends yet

    • Phoenix Reign

      **enjoying life

    • Phoenix Reign

      **enjoying life

    • http://www.facebook.com/jcsnmbr1 Stephan A. Baker

      Good for you.  That’s the type of marriage I want.

    • F3ral Anarchy

      I dont think its a fun killer. i think the story is more based on black women being okay with the idea of being single and childless. 

      • Someday

        Personally, I think many of the black women who are single and childless have not chosen this path, but now that they are on it they sing it’s praises.  I have anl older single, childless cousin in my family who regrets not marrying and having children.  She actually encourages us younger girls to not end up like her.  And she encourages us to date outside of our race to expand our options (crazy, b/c this cousin is so pro black, it’s ridiculous).  She talks about who will take care of her when she gets older.  She is educated with multi-degrees nice homes, Mercedes in their garage,etc.  And lately I see many women like her who use the excuse that most marriages will end in divorce.  These same women are extremely feminist, against IR dating, and look down on those who want to marry. 

        • http://www.facebook.com/RosarioRed Rosario Stefania Scarsci

          I’m 21, in college. Frankly, I don’t plan on marriage but I’m not ruling it out. I honestly don’t think I’d ever want children. People say things change, I highly doubt. I wouldn’t mind marriage, but I’m not sure if children are for me. I’m really not the mommy type. Some women do choose these paths because deep down we know how we are. Being single can be fun, especially at 21. Men, any age, really do not want to settle down. I wish more women realized this. Men are not hard wired to want marriage and whatnot. It’s just something they do. Women crave that lifestyle. I would rather focus on having a good career, financial stability and a great home, but that’s me.

          • Sweetpotato

            Yes, a 21 year shouldnt be focusing on marriage and babies.  But I can only assume it’s your lack of life experience that makes you believe men are not wired to settle down. Many men choose to marry and have kids.  Dont let the high number of men who are deadbeats cloud your perception of men.  There are many out there who want to have a family.

  • KIR12

    Wow, all of these happy single/never married black women. At least that’s what they say. The feminist mantra (I want but don’t NEED a man) How’s that working out for you black women? Blacks have lost their sense of community and now it’s all about me and mine. I got mine……. mine went college. The funny thing is we never here on these blogs from the black baby mama who had 4 kids, one is a drug addict, another has a bunch of kids by a bunch of different men, another is in jail for assault/murder and the last one dropped put of H.S. can’t read and she doesn’t know where in the hell he’s at. Maybe this is a little extreme but not by much. Remember there was a time between 1900 to 1960 that the majority of black women had husbands, at some period black women married at a higher percentage than white women, almost every black kid lived in a home with a father and black illegitimacy was between 10-24%. These are facts. I’m not an ideologue. I’m not against Liberals and liberal policies out of some stubborn ideology. I’m against them BECAUSE THEY DON’T WORK. The current state of the black community proves this point. 72% illegitimacy, 50% dropout rates and 15 to 20% unemployment, crime out of control and families with 3rd and 4th generational welfare recipients and generational poverty. How in the world can a community build wealth in this environment amongst this type of dysfunction?

     According to 2011 data from the U.S. Census Bureau, 46 percent of Black adults have never married compared to 26 percent of all American adults. Black women between the ages of 35 and 44 have the highest rate of singlehood when compared to other women in the same age bracket. 31 percent of African American women by their early forties have never married as compared to only 9 percent of Whites, 11 percent of Asian women, and 12 percent of Latino women in the same age group.

    • Identified

      As a woman, I agree.  Liberalism has gone too far = damaging our community/ values.  The older I get the more conservative I become.  Im married, Im a mother and I see how these extreme shifts have changed us as a people.  With that being said, I must say that I dont have a problem with people choosing to be single.  I do wish that those with children (or who plan to have children) will choose otherwise.  For the benefit of our kids. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/jcsnmbr1 Stephan A. Baker

      Sad.

    • F3ral Anarchy

      those women you spoke of in your first paragraph probably cant afford a pc to blog from.  the article has NOTHING to do with the family but all with women being ok with being an adult, single and childless.   All those stats you put up have NOTHING to do with single women with no kids. 

      • KIR12

        Are you aware that black women had a higher marriage percentage than white women up until 1960? If you are, how can you make that statement.

        • F3ral Anarchy

          ok so they did. but again what does that have to do with the article being about why its good to stay single and childless?

    • http://www.facebook.com/RosarioRed Rosario Stefania Scarsci

      It’s not just about black women. You bought black into this. Remember that, not the article.

      • KIR12

        I thought this was a blog dedicated to black women.

    • Pahleeze

      And I’m going to keep it real with you….WOMEN are not to blame for everything. We have programs for our girls (ie Black Girls Rock, S.I.S.T.A) and most black women continue to excel in career and education and life goals. However where are the MEN??? What are you all doing for each other? Too many black men have this “if its not my seed then my heart wont  bleed mentatilty!” Yet you still continue to blame women? Ya’ll will write a book, make a movie, rap and sing a song, build a company but WHAT DO YOU GIVE BACK??
      BLACK MEN STAND UP! The community of women is still strong because we will help another sister but men don’t sympathize with one another. The community is in complete disarray because the men still don’t give time, money and energy to revitalizing the community. Yet you are waiting on women to do a little more…pahleeze!

      • KIR12

        Black women refuse to acknowledge that this is a SELF INFLICTED relationship tragedy. Yes, today, there are a lot of black men who are players, thugs/convicts and bums. But how did this happen? Black men did not always abandon their families. From 1900 to 1960 the majority of black women were married, almost every black kid had a father in the home and in some decades black women married at a higher percentage than white women. Remember, the black illegitimacy rate was between 10 to 24% from 1900 to 1960. These are facts not revisionist history. Today illegitimacy is 72%+. Which is incredible when you think about it. That’s an increase of over 50% in less than 50 years. Black women let the white elitist, Progressives, liberals and Feminist (the man is wanted but not NEEDED in the home) into their beds and homes do something that 400 years of Slavery, Jim crow and discrimination was unable to do. Destroy the black family. This was accomplished with their failed social engineering programs and policies and their agenda of the “New Familial Structure”. How can a boy learn how to be a responsible man without responsible men in the home and in the community, Osmosis?

  • RedButterfly81

    I’ve been single for over 2 years and I feel more independent and free now. Right now I’m focused on my daughter and going to school for nursing so I don’t have time to date anybody. I go out with my single friends on the weekends and yeah men hit on me, but I’m not ready for a relationship right now.

    • MISRA

      Sister!

  • F3ral Anarchy

    i can say that since my divorce ive never been happier!  :O)

    • http://twitter.com/Blk_M_S_Mom BlkMarriedSingleMom

      preach! but I don’t intend on being single forever. lol

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