Reasons Why Black Women Don’t Date White Men

January 4th, 2012 - By MN Editor

Interracial dating has been one of the biggest conversations within the black community. Black men have made it no secret their liking to white women. Regina King recently raised the argument that we as black women still have not become completely comfortable dating outside our race. I recently did a survey on a group of black women regarding their reasons for not dating men who are not of color. Through my findings it seems as though black women aren’t actually opposef to dating outside of their race. Part of the dilemma lies in women of color thinking that men outside of their race won’t be attracted to them. Below are the 5 top reasons black women are apprehensive about going there with a white guy.

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  • aster won

    this article is garbage and wrong on just about every aspect, imo.

  • smps76

    Not sure what “white” really means anymore. I am a “white” guy who is half Mexican. I am married to a Puerto Rican that has some black ancestry. We have a beautiful child and to be honest, I’m not sure why they’re racial barriers in dating (assuming you aren’t biased or racist). You see a person you like, go for it and try and meet them. If you’re lucky you’ll have something in common, but to stay away from people of another race based on stereotypes? I don’t know. That to me seems like a sad reason to miss out on meeting some very interesting people. Just an opinion.

  • http://twitter.com/KhurrumM Khurrum

    I think it might be a factor of whether or not you were raised in heavily black culture. Black women who mostly hang out with white people likely find relationships with white men more easily.

  • Dolmance

    I normally wouldn’t answer this because it’s kind of a woman’s thread, but I feel like i must say something. I’m kind on in years, but I had a long relationship with a black woman back in the early 70′s, who told me there were a whole lot of white guys out there that just don’t notice black women. Anyway, she was beautiful. And she was offended. I checked it out. Those white guys were either racists or gay or both.

    Obama’s President. Now we can all date each other. It’s a whole new world. And we’re never going to get rid of our racial insanity until we all start getting with each other, for real. And then we’ll all look like Brazilians and our descendents will be very, very happy about that too because Brazilians are very, very, very good looking.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacklyn-P-Everage/738315726 Jacklyn P. Everage

      No disrespect, but I have no desire for all of us to look like Brazilians. I like the features and the beauty of African Americans. Not hating on Brazilians or anyone with that look. I just love my self, my heritage, my culture, and the legacy of my people. Nothing wrong with looking and being African American.

  • dave

    When I was in college I saw a movie called Birth of a Nation it promoted racism and surpisingly the streotypes of black men in that film are the same they use today. Even though it was created in the 1930s and times have changed I guess….I was still disgusted because they depicted black men as drooling animals who craved white women. Since I experienced racism going to a white school and now that I saw it in films. I decided until racism is gone for good in America I wont feel comfortable dating a white women. I’m not sure about black women but do you really feel comfortable dating white after seeing millions of racist tweets and race riots of 2012.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ashley.yellowdy Ashley Yellowdy

    Um, that’s not true that most Black men are married to White women. Where did this person get their stats from? And this whole thing is based off of only 6 Black women? They couldn’t do a larger study? It doesn’t matter to me regardless, since I have dated mainly White and Latin men since I seem to be the most attracted to them (especially Latin men), but that marriage “fact” is WAAAY off. Look up the statistics on interracial marriage in this country, and you will see that over 90 percent of Black men marry Black women.

  • http://www.facebook.com/liya.nouvelle Liya Nouvelle

    I am African ,and I will tell you that Africans are one of the most educated group in the U.S. Education is very impt to us. I think black women need to stop holding themselves back these things are listed not imp that the author listed to hold you back from dating white men. There are lot of white men out there open to dating black girls. Don’t waste you time waiting for black men who are dating white girls.

  • NicPal

    Number one is the truth but the irony is in earlier centuries especially those that (African Americans were in slavery European American women were thicker and in addition made their clothing fuller to model after African American women bodies because they were intimidated by our “thickness” in certain areas) I could go on with that ideology but that would be a dissertation so I’ll just end it right there. In addition; if you look at art from the 16th, 17th and 18th centuries you will see pictures of European American women who are just as thick or thicker then African American women. Its just interesting that being “skinny” is the pattern of today but maybe 200 years ago in this country it was not. Just food for thought:)

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacklyn-P-Everage/738315726 Jacklyn P. Everage

      I wouldn’t call this European American women “thick”. If they were, they wouldn’t have been modeling our body types. I would say they were much more of a healthier weight, but they were always known to be “slender” built–not very curvy or full in certain areas.

  • Matthew Sarad

    But ladies remember… pick the right guy. Men can be disrespectful users. If you target men with college degrees you will usually get a higher quality person.

  • Matthew Sarad

    If you’ve walked the streets of Hollywood lately you’ll see a lot of white men walking down the street with black women. It’s increasingly popular. White men like black women… black women can have better overall attitude toward men.

  • DTGallday

    most ignorant list ive ever read in my entire life… no lie

  • Latrice

    “Black men have made it no secret their liking to white women.” This is such a broad generalization of black men. What sort of ‘study’ was conducted to come up with this nonsense? I can’t speak for my entire race or gender, but my only qualification for dating is that the person (regardless of race) treats me respectfully and that I enjoy his/her company. Of course, it is only natural that aesthetics play a role, but attractiveness comes in all races. I don’t think most black men think “Yeah, gotta get me a white woman” and purposely reject black women. I think they like the person, there is an attraction for various reasons regardless of their race. It’s 2012, we need to date whomever we want and stop self-segregating in all areas of our lives.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacklyn-P-Everage/738315726 Jacklyn P. Everage

      I may disagree with your push to tell other people that we need to date whomever we want. If people want to self-segregate, that is also a choice. We don’t need to swirl. If that is your choice, that’s you–no need to push it on everyone else.

  • Tom

    I am a Latin American male who dates all races. My last two girlfriends were Black women. Before that, Japanese, and before that White. As far as Black Ladies hair goes, I love the different combinations that these ladies can do with their hair and have no problem with them deciding to go natural when they need a break from the amount of effort it takes.
    The only thing a “non Black” male needs to adjust to is the fact that if your girl changes her hair, you had better notice and give her a compliment because she went through a lot of trouble for it. Praise her for her efforts and tell her she is beautiful. Hmm, I think that applies to all races.

  • Keelay_17

    Jesus Christ. People have the freedom to love who they please. It’s just breaks my heart that nobody can do that without being ridiculed about it. Society has gotten to a point where the judgement never stopps. At the end of the day it’s left to us to do what we believe, even if others don’t agree. I am a young black female, and I’m from NYC. I honestly don’t see why race matters in dating or in anything.

    • youngblackman

      Why are you even here then? Go read a “colorblind” blog dominated by the rich whites in NYC.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/NMJYFT6OYFTITFMJ2WJVBV2FAA Rehana

    I hate that term. It’s just my preference. The look, the eyes, the
    confidence, and sometimes the cocky/flirty attitude catches my
    attention.I
    am beautiful woman and I love good man…..inter racial romance is my dream… so I
    joined —blackwhitePlanet.С0M—–it’s where to- connect with
    beautiful and excellent people! I just feel more natural and comfortable being around them.
    When a black woman rubs up against me I just melt. Anyway, keep an open
    mind cause we are out there. More than you think.

  • MadameD

    Black woman here who’s happily married to a handsome white man. He is the first white man I’ve dated. I normally dated black men and I’ve dated one or two hispanics. It just so happened that the man who was made for me happened to be white =)

  • Starsky

    I am a white male & I think some of the reasons are not stated here. At least in my experience, alot of it has to do w/ how family perceives you, even when you get along great. If you are confident, a productive person, have a good physique & have a little bit of respect, I find most black women can be very attracted. In fact, it’s easier for me to talk to black women(most of the time anyways) then white women & I don’t know why, but it always turns out that way.

    Also, I don’t buy the “it’s tougher because I’m black thing”, it *can* be, but saying that as a universal maxim sets up for failure. Life is tough, period. It hits very hard & it doesn’t care who. If you disagree, I’d like to hear from you!

    I also think one of the reason *some* white men are unattractive is they act black instead of just being themselves around women. I really don’t know why because this is stupid. The greatest impediment I have found to relationships, is either family, specifically males & if it’s a predominately black neighborhood & your the only white person there you can get some stares, but once again mostly from the males & women don’t seem to have a problem. This is just my personal experience.

    • Starsky

      Oh & also, I like the hair(although I prefer it long, I like straight hair, “nappy”, just something other than super-short hair….& I think black women pull off short hair better than most others), the butt, & *prefer* women who take care of themselves physically, in good physical shape, that says something about the mindset. That is in a purely physical side, but I like someone who is fun & enjoy listening to them! It’s also ok to be pick on the other side. If I were a black woman I wouldn’t want a white guy if the dude was a whimp, lacked drive etc. Its ok to have some baseline requirements & if the guy gets butthurt about it, then maybe he isn’t for you!

  • mike p

    Mike P I have dated white woman and black woman. had more fun and a better time dating black woman I don’t know why but I felt like I could be myself. as for their body I love all their curves and how they look and their hair it doesn’t bother me. its their hair let them ware it how they want. as for education I barely finished high school. but I do have a good job that I like. I got into a triad. so anyone can do anything they set their mind to. I feel. but it is hard to meet a good black woman to ask her out. wish I could find one. been looking

  • W.

    I am a black caribbean woman. My fiance is white american. This article is straight up bull! lol This is very wrong. My finace DOES appreciate curves, my culture, and my hair. Secondly there are many educated black women that hold bachelors and masters degrees. This article is bias and weird.

  • Kurisupisu

    The last I heard was that love was color blind…………