Lies Women Tell Their Friends To Make Them Feel Better

December 16, 2011  |  

"Two female friends talking"

No one likes to be the bearer of bad news to a friend. And we’ve all gone through the anxieties of dating—of not being called back, of not being called at all, of having our date flirt with the bartender…and along the way, we’ve come up with some “explanations” for these events that have made us feel better. Of course, in the end, we learned that we were only fooling ourselves. But when our friend is hurting, sometimes we just want to fool her…I mean comfort her…rather than break the bad news just yet. So we say this:

"Man cheating on girlfriend"

“He was just being nice.”

Your friend’s man is blatantly flirting with someone else at a party, and to ease her humiliation you tell her it’s just in his nature to be friendly and that he probably didn’t even realize that that girl was interested in him. Come on—men have a mean radar for when they are being flirted with. They’ve spent their lives intentionally developing it. He knew. And he was flirting.

"Woman checking phone"

“Maybe his phone died, he has no service, he lost it or it was stolen”

A man has taken hours, or even a couple days to get back to your friend. Phones do get stolen. Phones die. Some places have bad service. But never do all of these things happen back to back over a multiple day period. Not to mention, he could just use Facebook or email if he really wanted to contact her.

 "Black couple in bed"

“Men go through dry spells too”

Your friend complains that her boyfriend hasn’t been in the mood to have sex for weeks. You tell her men go through dry spells just like women do. And it’s true—they do. I mean, I think maybe one man in the history of the male species may have once…Come on! Men are sexual creatures. One night he isn’t into it—okay. But a couple weeks? Something is up.

"Black man looking sad"

“He looked awful and he seemed miserable”

You tell your friend this after you ran into the ex who dumped her. When realistically, he seemed really happy, laid back and looked great. Also—it’s just immature for your friend to take pleasure from the fact that someone who rejected her isn’t doing well.

"Man explaining himself"

“Maybe he’s telling the truth!”

A guy dumps your friend and says it’s because he is just too busy with work, or just not ready for a relationship with anyone at all. You tell her those are perfectly valid points. But we all know how love works from first hand experience—you either fall in it or you don’t. And he didn’t. For the right girl, he would make time in between work and he would be ready for a relationship.

"Awkward first date"

“Maybe he’s not sure if you want it”

A guy your friend is seeing won’t lay a finger on her in public, or hasn’t asked her out again. You tell her maybe he is intimidated by her. Maybe he doesn’t know if she is into PDA, or if she is even into him and would want a second date. There are two reasons this logic is no good: 1) if (and that’s a BIG if) it is correct, she shouldn’t be with a man anyways who doesn’t have the balls to touch her in public or ask her out again if he really likes her and 2) It’s probably just not correct. If he likes her, he steals a kiss. He asks her back out.

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  • Kim335542341313254

    My friend just met a black man on Blackwhitemeet.COMit’s where for men and women looking for interracial’ship for a fabulous lifestyle
    It’s a nice place for black white sing’les, to interact with each other…no bounds or extremes in front of true love.

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  • SimplyComplex_87

    women need to be more real with each other. that’s one quality i appreciate in men…they’re straightforward and don’t sugarcoat ish.

    • pregnant*bombshell

      Not all men are straight forward. If they were there wouldn’t be the term, cheater. As jeezy said women lie, men lie, numbers don’t lie. That is so trust you have to beware of both sexes.

  • G88

    I’ve been the type of friend who tells you straight up “you better be careful or this will happen or you better watch out for him because everything you have told me about him shows that he’s going to dog you out” and you know what that got me in the end?…home girl got mad at me because i didn’t feed her the BS she wanted to hear and when he did dog her out she got mad at me…some people want to be lied too…even if you tell them don’t touch the fire because your going to get burned they still want to do it…moral to my story not all friends appreciate honesty, even if its from the ones who care about them….

  • Sassyonela1

    Real friends who have your best interest at heart don’t sugar coat it or lie!!

    • pregnant*bombshell

      Thank you! I was going to say the same thing. The truth hurts but it is what it is. The problem is: most women can’t handle it or would turn on the girlfriend.

    • Although true friends don’t sugar coat there is such a thing as being tactful. Not sugar coating things doesn’t give anyone permission to be rude. 

      • Girliusmaximus

        You are so right… I used to be an offender of this with my best friend until somebody came to me one day and told me I was being a straight up b*tch with my advice… Then my friend finally comes clean and tells me that’s why she never listened to me cause I sounded like her mom instead of her friend. So now I chill and come a little nicer…

        • i agree, but sometimes, theres no other way to say it. I come off as a b*tch sometimes when I give advice, but at the end of the day, its the truth. Sometimes, tact needs to go out the window.

    • IJS

      You know I use to until I realized it ws hurting them more than it was helping them. Sugar coating will just keep them on that love merry go round. If you know better, you do better. Tell it like it is.

  • Kimc352255554

    My friend just met a black man on Blackwhitemeet.COMit’s where for men and women looking for interracial’ship for a fabulous lifestyle
    It’s a nice place for black white sing’les, to interact with each other…no bounds or extremes in front of true love.

  • tastythoughts

    i hate men who act like their phones dont work but update their stats on facebook awwwwl day smh….no gurl he just aint right

    • tastythoughts

      u be knowin huh….bendito…

      • tastythoughts

        Smh. Apparently u like to buy so really whose the fool. But if it makes u feel like a man or woman to write like that knock yourself out. You don’t have an impact if that’s what your looking for sorry.

        • tastythoughts

          *yawn*

    • Sugar_Spice

      I don’t see how MN monitors the hell out of this site but allows you to post crap like this. This is a classy website & if you want to keep with this ratchetness I suggest you keep it movin to bossip or somewhere else.

      • Girliusmaximus

        Oh my GOSH. Half the stuff I post on a regular has to be approved by a moderator but this low life fool gets on here DAILY and posts this garbage. I agree with you 300%…

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    • Ki33253422434

      My friend just met a black man on Blackwhitemeet.COMit’s where for men and women looking for interracial’ship for a fabulous lifestyle
      It’s a nice place for black white sing’les, to interact with each other…no bounds or extremes in front of true love.