Ok … So I was asked to write this column with the idea of giving you my opinion on love, relationships, spirituality and stuff like that. Every week the beautiful ladies of Madame Noire send me a topic and I just say what I want and then they give it to you. So here it is.
My topic for this week was: ”How to Decode A Brother When He’s Talking All That Jazz” …
So I kicked this one around a little bit and decided to just answer a few questions that my female friends are always asking. What does it mean when he did this or what does it mean when said that?
1. He says he’s going to call and doesn’t …
Now I really don’t understand why anyone would do this but I guess it’s just to be cordial. I’ve never really taken someone’s number and not called. Men probably do it just to be nice or maybe it was a one-night stand and he wants to keep it cool. But if you meet a guy and he takes your number and doesn’t call you, he’s JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!
2. He says “nothing” when you ask him what’s wrong …
If so, it’s because most guys don’t want to be in an exhaustive conversation about their feelings. I’m not having a two- or three-hour long conversation about my feelings. I’m not.
3. He forgets your birthday …
Ohhhh … Don’t take it personal. Guys forget a lot of sh*t. It’s not personal though. Women are a lot more emotional about remembering things. I don’t remember sh*t … Sometimes I don’t remember my own mother’s birthday.
4. He says he wants to take things slow
He either got a chick on the side or … HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU! Ha! Most guys want to take it slow because they’re not really ready to just be with you. They’re still in player mode.
5. Do men ever outgrow player mode?
Yeah.
6. All the way fully?
Look … You’re only good as your last hit. It depends on the dude and it depends on the woman he meets. Most dudes don’t want to cheat. They just don’t’ find the right person that makes them not want to cheat.
7. It’s been a month of dates and he hasn’t tried to get me in bed …
You’re either really intimidating or you’re just a turn-off. Either way, you’re in the friend zone. OR he’s one of those dudes that’s trying to turn you out. He’s trying to wait for you to go crazy and just attack him like “TAKE ME NOW!” There’s always that cat that doesn’t like to make the first move and likes chicks to be on him.
8. He doesn’t try to kiss you on the first date …
Well he could just be a gentleman or he has some more sneaky plans for you. You can do a lot to a woman if you make her wait, because that’s her game.
9. He says he’ll be home at midnight and comes home at 4am …
Smell his nuts.
10. He says he’s not ready for commitment
Believe him. You have an honest one. You should really try to create a friendship with him.
11. He’s taking a weekend trip with the fellas …
Depends on his type of friends. If they look like macks, then you already know. If they look sweet, you already know. If you you’ve never met his friends, it’s either really his girlfriend or he’s probably trying to distance himself from you … Sounds like game.
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Check out Bilal’s new album, “Airtight’s Revenge” on September 14th and holler at him on Twitter: @bilal_oliver
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7/23/10, 11:08:am
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by anika lani, Madame Noire. Madame Noire said: Our Celebrity Columnist, Bilal, Teaches YOU How to Decode Men!: You would not believe the juicy-juicy that our sex… http://bit.ly/a9SPkI [...]
traluv
7/23/10, 11:29:am
SoulQuarian Bilal…how did you get this gig? I like your simplicity…keep it up and help us ladies stay woke!
starlight
7/23/10, 12:37:pm
lol…omg, i feel you on number 2. My ex used to say that all the time, and of course later it would come out,but i had to dig first. Men pls, just talk and be free.
No.9 had me dying…wow. I think there’s a song about that too ….lol. keep it coming Bilal
mktmaven
7/23/10, 13:29:pm
This is so awesome! I can’t wait to read what he says next time. Soooo looking forward to new music from Bilal!
londyjamel
7/23/10, 14:06:pm
hell naw lol i’m typically not with the generalizations of men and women–folks are folks–but this right here is legit.
i’ve been married 7 years and there’s not a formula. but this here… yessir lol
right on. if nothing else, it’ll make you think.
sweet gig lol but i ain’t smelling nobody’s nuts…
Ayman
7/23/10, 15:53:pm
Just for number 7 he may want to stay ” clean ” until marriage.
Number 8 he may be a shy guy.
Jaclyn
7/23/10, 18:26:pm
LMAO londyjamel on the nutz comment…ah come on..sometimes u gotta haha j/k I love, love this column and look forward to simple answer NOT the bs we usually hear..
Kool
7/23/10, 18:44:pm
Very interesting! Simplicity at its best!
The end of men? Don’t hold your breath | Uncategorized | Information about Careers
7/23/10, 19:22:pm
[...] Our Celebrity Columnist, Bilal, Teaches YOU How to Decode Men! « Madame Noire [...]
Ms Shana
7/23/10, 23:19:pm
I really needed these tips for this new guy i’ve been dealing with for the past month….He’s a hardworker and is always super busy and he always hit me with the “nothing” reply when I ask him whats wrong….Glad to get a mans point of view on situations….
Cotonishigh
7/24/10, 06:47:am
haha that was fun and true
beautifulprose
7/24/10, 12:33:pm
This is amazing Bilal. You telling the truth. Some things women should just know, other things are uncovering the mack in men. Love this Column.
traluv
7/24/10, 15:28:pm
Bilal, are you single. If so, why? If not, wut are the pros of having a “first lady”?
p.s. why didnt they call you for the Prince tribute on BET? I know you kinda on the underground a lil but I would have loved you sing the hell outta any of his songs, cuz besides Janae’, nobody did nuthin’. Big ups to Patti tho’…she’s old.
msbeauty
7/26/10, 15:33:pm
I really liked #10 it’s true!! As a woman,we get upset when the guy says that he’s not ready for a relationship. It’s better that we know the truth instead of being lead on. We only get upset because we already expect them to be ready. I’ll just stop pushing it because he is a great guy.
Call2wice
7/26/10, 16:05:pm
Nice, now we need the list of “He’s not that into you”.
Rozmo
7/26/10, 16:12:pm
Smell his balls ladies!! Stop playing and find out whats what….Irish Spring, typical sweaty, a lil tart lol, or I’ma hurt this nicc….LMAO
Singer Bilal Has Some Choice Words for Black Women | NewstalkCleveland - WERE 1490 Cleveland's Home for Honest News
7/27/10, 12:46:pm
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Singer Bilal Has Some Choice Words for Black Women | ZHipHopCleveland - Z 107.9 Cleveland's Home for the Hip-Hop Community
7/27/10, 15:35:pm
[...] SOURCE: http://MadameNoire.com [...]
Amaka7
7/29/10, 13:30:pm
This is fan-flippin-tastic! Can we get a monthly column Q&A regarding relationships, from more beautiful brothas like Bilal?