Totally Broke Moments You Think Are Fun When You’re In Love
If you’re broke and single, a lot of people don’t even need to know that you’re broke. You can just pretend you’re in such high demand socially that you’re too busy to join these friends for drinks or those friends for a movie when in reality, you’re at home, reading a magazine (that you’ve already read twice) because you have no money. But when you’re in a relationship—and one in which you live with your partner at that—you can’t really hide the fact that you live paycheck to barely next paycheck from your boo. And if he is broke, too, you become like a money-less superhero pair, coming up with ways to save the day on a few dollars. The great thing is that if you’re really in love, you can be happier doing nothing at all than you would be at some fabulous event with people you only feel lukewarm about. On that note, here are totally broke moments you actually enjoy if you’re in love.
Staying at the motel far from the wedding party
The bride and groom secured a block of rooms for their guests at a nice hotel for a reasonable rate. But you can’t afford a reasonable rate—you need the type of rate that comes from a motel room with questionable smells. So you and your partner secretly sneak off to that place after the reception, acting as if you’re going off to your fancy room, too.
Sneaking your own drinks into the pool
When you do stay at hotels, you can’t afford the $16 poolside cocktails. So you sneak your own beverages into the pool. Inside your cute thrift store beach bag is actually a mini cooler with a six-pack.
Stuffing the hotel mini fridge with groceries
You also cannot afford the $20 tuna sandwiches by the pool, so you go to the grocery store before checking into your hotel. You stuff your mini fridge with sandwich materials and lunch food for the duration of your stay.
Sharing a stuffed Lyft Line
You’ve survived and even enjoyed some pretty ridiculous shared Lyft Lines. Sometimes you share them with kind, social, well-adjusted humans; sometimes you share them with another couple who is in a drunken brawl. You never know what you are going to get besides the discounted ride.
Taking the bus to a fancy event
You’ve taken the bus to some fancy events. You’ve stood on a bus, holding the train of your gala gown while your partner held his coat in the air so as not to wrinkle it, to attend a wedding.
Scouring the Internet for delivery coupons
You never order delivery before looking for coupons. Without skipping a beat, you set up your laptops, side by side, and the race is on to find coupons that apply to your pad thai and dumplings.
Eating at odd hours to get happy hour prices
You’ve had dinner at 1 am to get the happy hour prices at the sushi restaurant. After a drunken night at the bars, you’ve stopped in for the super early bird prices at the breakfast place, taken the food to go, passed out, and consumed it when you awoke at 2pm.
Shopping around online for better condom prices
Even sex supplies have to be a bargain when you’re broke, so you shop around online to compare condom and lubricant prices before making this important purchase.
Staying in funny little AirBnbs
You’ve stayed in someone’s garage and the room of someone’s child who has left for college but really hasn’t been redecorated since they were a little kid. You’ve slept among stuffed animals and storage boxes to save money on accommodations.
Surviving the dollar store
Some couples spend their Sunday afternoons strolling the charming Farmer’s Market, but not you two—you two charge through the crowds at the Dollar Store and debate the legitimacy of discounted energy drinks.
Circling forever to find free parking
You don’t even touch the topic of valet, or that $12 per night lot. Nope. You’ve both worn your comfortable walking shoes because you know you’ll be parking at least a 10-minute walk from the venue to save money on parking.
Gambling on expiration dates
Neither of you likes to waste food. Okay, neither of you can afford to waste food. So you’ve carved the mold off of otherwise-good cream cheese to make your morning bagels.
Talking sh*t about your rich friends
Talking sh*t about your rich friends is a favorite past time. You love to tease the ridiculous things that they waste money on.
Viscously setting alarms for free trial expiration dates
You’re all about the free trials, but you cannot afford those automatic payments to kick in, so you diligently set several calendar reminders and put sticky notes everywhere to ensure you cancel that HBO Go trial on time.
Staying in to do nothing at all
When you’re broke but happy, the beauty of your relationship is that you can enjoy yourselves, staying in and doing nothing at all. Somehow, that feels like a treat.