Would You Want Your Mother To Walk You Down The Aisle On Your Wedding Day?
A new report in Us Weekly claims there is a possibility that Meghan Markle’s mother could be the one walking her down the aisle for her wedding to Prince Harry.
According to a supposed “insider,” the 36-year-old former Suits star who is set to wed on May 19 could very well have her mother, Doria Radlan, whom she’s quite close to, escort her on her big day.
“With the wedding, they both want to do things their way,” the source told Us. “While they will always be mindful of traditions and the views of their elders, the day is ultimately about them and what they want to do. The day of the wedding itself will certainly hold a few unconventional surprises.”
The source continued, “I’ve heard that Meghan wants her mother to walk her down the aisle, which would be a sweet moment.”
Sweet? For sure. Controversial? Maybe so.
The star’s father, Thomas Markle, is alive and it’s assumed that he should be making an appearance on her wedding day. Markle has never said that she had a strained relationship with him, though she’s always been vocal about her relationship with her mom. Thomas and Doria divorced when Meghan was six, and he currently lives in Mexico.
When tracked down by the U.K.’s Daily Mirror while simply trying to pick up a pack of cigarettes and some beer at the store back in December, Thomas was asked if he would be present to give away his daughter at St. George’s Chapel in Windsor Castle in May. He told the reporter, “Yes. I’d love to.”
Even Meghan’s brother, Thomas Markle, Jr., volunteered to escort her. He told the Daily Mail in that he didn’t know if he would be invited, but he would love to be present.
“I don’t know if she gets to invite who she wants. But she’ll reach out if she wants me there, she’ll call me,” he said in December. “She knows where to find me. But that’s up to her, there’s no pressure. I wouldn’t mind seeing my little sister have the biggest wedding in the world. That would be incredible.”
He continued, “If my dad doesn’t walk her down the aisle, then I will.”
Looks like neither party will get the chance.
As with most weddings, it was assumed that Meghan’s father would walk her down the aisle because that’s tradition. But said tradition is rooted in the old idea that a man’s daughter is something of property. To marry her, you have to ask her father for her hand, he has to “give away” his daughter on the wedding day, and in the vast amount of big ceremonies, he has a dance with her even after her first dance with her husband. (Not to mention there is the bride price conversation in some cultures.)
When you really think about it, the mother of the bride doesn’t really get nearly as much love on the big day or in the engagement process. She might get to wear a certain outfit and help her daughter get dressed, but that’s about it.
So why not let your mother walk you down the aisle?
Quite a few of us are actually closer to our mothers, and in some ways, by default. Mothers are often the nurturers who make the home. Fathers, on the other hand, are seen as the ones who provide for the home, and that’s likely why people tend to act so impressed and swoon when a man watches his children, plays with his children and runs errands with his children — alone. Studies have also shown that of both the mother and father-child relationships, the “mother-child relationship quality continues to shape overall levels of emotional experience in daily life.”
And yet, fathers escorting their daughters down the aisle is the custom. And if not the father, some type of male. A brother. An uncle. A family friend. A male mentor of some sort. I’ve even seen women who barely had a relationship with their fathers bemoaning over whether or not they would show up to walk them down the aisle on their wedding day. But rarely do we consider our moms.
With that being said, I think it’s a nice idea for Meghan to be escorted by her mother, if that is truly what happens on her wedding day. While it could ruffle feathers, as long as her father knows the plan beforehand so as not to disappoint him and his expectations on the day, it should be a beautiful moment for all. Especially for Meghan. This is not only because she will be saying “I do,” but also because if she goes through with it, she will get to stay true to her own desires on her day, as opposed to going the conventional route for the sake of “tradition.”